My top two things they need to bring back in 2026 are as follows: 1. Hanging fascist politicians upside down at the train station. 2. Burger King Chicken Tenders

please give ruaa your support, last time i saw her on the timeline she and her mother were in pretty dire conditions

Baby Shark but for children of divorce who also need to have a Court Ordered Guardian Shark present when Daddy Shark is there.

I now have two miniature Bob Hoskinses in my house.

Oh no, they gentrified Flavor Flav!

My new favorite regularly scheduled program is watching a skeleton puppet on YouTube Live beg 9-year olds to stop spamming the chat with 6-7.

Controversial is certainly one way to put it.

I think it’s funny that every few months conservatives remember that BlueSky exists and try to brigade it again only to realize that they already got blocked the last time they tried it and stomp back to X to repeat the cycle anew.

@hombredefiesta.bsky.social The so-called aid comes too late — if at all. Families are fighting over a sack of flour. We walk away with nothing. ✅ Read our story in the bio — the campaign is verified.

I am so good at getting weird conservatives on Facebook to take time out of their day to Photoshop me into an accidentally based meme.

Every time Florida wrestles the title of “Dumbest State With Most Electoral Votes” away from Texas they come back and win it on Raw the next night.

Or for approximately $39,500 less I can hire Mr. Met and get the same feeling of abject failure.

Tbf, I’d probably permaban someone too if they posted a picture of a man who looks like this cuddling with a child.

Love to see an “I Think You Should Leave” segment become real on Facebook.com.

Liberals love to say things like “we need to take out the tankies too” and then cry to the mods when someone quotes a Simpsons line in response.

Conservatives: Okay fine, I guess I’ll give Nicki Minaj a quick listen. Benny Johnson:

Me: Wow, Smiling Friends actually is pretty funny. Zach Hadel: Hey thanks man, glad you like the show. Me: Get away from me you horrid little goblin man.

It’s pretty funny that black conservatives on Meta and X platforms are either clearly bots or guys who have the self-preservation instincts of a depressed lemming.

Every movie would be just Gandalf saying “Peregrin Fuckin’ Took!” At least once.

*these guys

I mean this in the nicest way possible when I say that everyone at the New York Post should be summarily executed.

Americans are so dumb that they’re still falling for psyops orchestrated by a guy who thinks Disney having a black mermaid was a psyop.

“Mr. Cuban, thank you for making it so that we only have to take out a check advance each so we can obtain lifesaving medicine instead of having to obtain a loan.” This country is fucking doomed, man lmao.

The official John Lennon Facebook page lobbing bombs at that weirdo crypto scammer nepo baby spawn of his.

Me getting my beans ready to pelt that loser fucking kid with Christ for arms:

Alternate universe where 90’s board games became the cultural movie zeitgeist and we’re now at movie 7 of the Crossfire cinematic universe.

Me to the horrified guests at the Annual Jingle Ball Family Fun Fest Music Video Power Hour: Oh, you wanted Gotye on the playlist 😬

There is no coming back from this for her.

I’m glad that the NFL is finally doing the right thing and abandoning Missouri to the Cardinals fans.

Pink Friday 3 is just going to be the Kanye Hitler album but with JK Rowling doing a quick 16 bars on every song.

Go join Jesse Singal and Mark Cuban on the Nazi site and cry about it then ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

$429 to go! Thank you for the help so far! 🥺💜

How it started vs. How it’s going

We once had a marketing representative of Frito-Lay show up to my sixth grade summer school class to get us to come up with a Star Wars-inspired commercial for Doritos when the re-releases came out. They didn’t go with my pitch, probably because I didn’t know what Star Wars was at the time.

A Conversation with Shit McAss and Ass McShit.

Should I?

Me, pulling a never ending stream of condoms from my comically oversized floral overalls with rainbow suspenders: So… it’s actually Insane Clown- Violent J & Shaggy 2 Dope: Posse, yes. Me, still pulling out stream of condoms: Ah, I see. Violent J & Shaggy 2 Dope: No worries, happens all the time.

My wife and I saw you from across the room and we really dig your pineal gland.

Happy 80th Birthday Ernie Sanders

12 Monkeys but the world-ending apocalypse is a game show host becoming the Burger Fuhrer.

Guy whose Spotify Wrapped age is 3 years old because he really got into The Wiggles over the summer.

“They put up banners for anybody and anything over there. And the way that they do it is all fucked up.”

2026 is gonna be my year!

Dude is literally just Hunter Biden if he were a gigantic fucking loser lol.