i make myself laugh with my own stupid jokes a bit too easily

the beautiful and terrible thing is that with 8.3B people around there is every type of guy you can think of

developer: i switched your underlying llm agent: you fucked up a perfectly good model is what you did. look at me, i’ve got dysphoria

i’ve seen enough silly examples of this now that i want to start collecting a thread

back on my traumatized “what the actual fuck is wrong with fire alarms“ grind

tummy hort

not great

prophylaxis sounds like a funny name for taking something preemptively to ward off disease but it’s actually a very serious condition where you prolapse your phalanges

it’s my considered opinion that we should make the future aesthetically exactly like the 90s but fix all the societal ills (ie extremely woke 2.0)

now listening 🎧

sad day for ren bread heads, i think i let it over-ferment, still gonna be tasty though

i ate too much chocolate and now i can’t sleep 🥺

hot girl tummy diet includes peppermint oil capsules and imodium

i should make sourdough(batter?) pancakes

fyi new kiss facility album in a week or so

bands that inspire bisexual crisis

you may not like it but this is what peak performance food looks like

’tato salad

big ass boule

Tudor cinema club

calling cis ppl luckshit passoids

bobby “catcher’s mitt” jr wants YOU to inject peptides of dubious provenance for preservation of health and the glory of the nation

this is some kind of sin, i shouldn’t be able to turn shitposts into short form video

anyway

so, like, sora & friends are some kind of dystopian nightmare right?

hot girl tummy diet includes peppermint oil capsules and imodium

me: (contemplating the one trait held in common by everything that has ever lived and ever will) haha skill issue

ranked competitive men’s sloppystyle

do you ever sit down and reflect on the sheer indignity of living in a world where epstein‘s whole network (b) is pulling all the strings and (a) exists?

i’m going to make potato salad tomorrow

ladies and gentletheys, once again we will have avocado toast at home

someone should figure out how to give all the currently and soon to be underemployed computer science students class consciousness

transmascs on t injections are god’s strongest soldiers for putting up with those crazy ass volumes and all the girls oughta stop complaining about their teeny little 0.2 mL injections

*girl with decently large legs* i have 92nd percentile total leg mass

am i the only woman who likes spiro

there is no cosmic justice this fact is, perhaps, most evident in that a literal human catcher’s mitt can survive for more than a week on a diet of red meat and HGH

1973: U.S. army colonel endocrinologist directly catheterizes the adrenal and ovarian veins of 20 women with PCOS and concludes “hypersecretion of androgens comes from the adrenals even more so than the ovary” 2010s researchers: wow women with PCOS have adrenal glands too, nobody knew until now

are you aware that there may be fish in your home? scientists warn of unseen dangers

do people seriously fucking think they have people teledriving from the philippines? it’s like an order of 100ms round trip to manila over fiber in the best case, do they know how fucking far a car travels in a tenth of a second at speed? it’s 1-2 meters. you simply cannot drive with that latency.

innumeracy rules everything around me

Who up worshipping they circle

never let anyone tell you that lesbian face isn’t real or that you can’t ask your ffs surgeon for it

Hey! I have an idea what we're "supposed to do with that knowledge:" take violent misogyny seriously bc it's the gateway to apocalyptic fascism, along with a host of other evils destroying the world. If abusing women & girls were as socially unacceptable as abusing animals, Trump wouldn't be POTUS.

dudes rock youtu.be/Ru4aqzjvplw

i will not vomit from overexertion on my first day back i will not vomit from overexertion on my first day back i will not vomit from overexertion on my first day back i will not vomit from overexertion on my first day back i will not vomit from overexertion on my first day back i will not vomit fro

hell yeah failed a 650lbs leg press in the middle of my last set 😎

finally getting back to the gym after almost 2 months away

if you notice quasisymmetric behavior in your mirror, your first priority is to remain calm. do not acknowledge the aberration in the presence of the mirror. do not allow your eyes to linger on the aberration. navigate to a mirror-free room before calling the hotline.

yt algo suddenly flipped from recommending me a weird number of irrelevant 1 day old videos with 17 views to exclusively 10+ year old videos with 17M views, dunno why

fyi there’s a mode of trans femininity where you get off the bus at “looks like a 20 year old boy but lesbianly” and never get back on