one time i did something embarrassing and my friends started making fun of me and i cannot explain it but, i somehow shifted the collective animus to one of them and to this day everyone still associates the embarrassing moment with that person and not me. they saw me do it idk what happened

if none of the males in your group are performative then this musical is going to suck

i almost forgot to row row fight the power

now that he's back let's cancel jimmy kimmel for the man show

kimmel is an anagram of milk me

waittt what if autistic ppl just got extremely good at fucking in the last ~100 years

what if it just got a lot easier for autistic ppl to fuck in the last ~100 years

eeeeesh sorry my bad bro i think the perfect truth of existence is just a bit over your head

bouncing on it annoying style

social media is a thought dumpster you just dump the thoughts you’re not using and then the algorithm does some stuff and you get ads

if you spend enough time in public looking like you’re thinking about stuff people will just start calling you a thinker

virtue signaling is sick af bro like hell yeah tell me about those virtuous deeds i love hyping up the virtues of my homies

watching the rapture and shaking my ass so you know i agree

the bible says that it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God you have to liquidate everything and send it to my throne acct. i will take on all of humanity’s sins

guy who accidentally overslept and missed being raptured with the homies

i have an idea to save the economy. give me a lot of money and i will spend it. huge injections of demand across industries of all shapes and sizes. i can do this

yesterday at the liquor store fox was on tv and the banner said “Trump: Charlie Kirk will live forever” and i accidentally chortled and a woman glared at me

shaking my ass for the rapture

growing cute hips from sheer force of will

girl who calls all her hobbies taken together a "research programme"

I would always beat the shit out of my dad on his first phase but then he would transform into the pig beast Ganon and I was too little to know that I could hit his energy balls back at him with my sword

extremely likely that i’m autistic but we made it this far so whatever 🤙

when I was a kid I used to make my mom rent Rainbow Brite vhs tapes every time she went to the library sooo there may have been signs

booty gotta look good for the rapture

tbh at this point i’m like how bad could the rapture be let’s shake things up

pasta e fagioli

i don’t think it’s fair that ppl always complain about the male gays in movies

btw i would win the long walk for sure

watching the news and shaking my head so you know i disagree

the saddest thing is that every person is incredibly talented and almost none of us will ever have a chance to do something meaningful with it. imagine if we celebrated everyone and all of us had the mutual autonomy to determine our own impacts without fear of poverty

what if instead of the current wild west of intrusive and manipulative advertising we just had a highly searchable and filterable database of all registered companies by good/service and you had to actively decide to look for something in order to see it

in fairness to paranormal investigators, gravity and wind are both kind of like ghosts

you tellin me a whale curdled this blood

wait everyone in the superman movie is so fucking hot

17yo kitty with lifelong trust issues just had her very first belly rub 🥰

self-serving convictions and punch card ambitions in pursuit of stature swallowed by attrition ponzi scheme tradition the mirror’s constructed variation stunted image as the measurement of lords and i’m just a framework for absurdity

setting you up for a call and response and getting mad when you interrupt me

sorry i’ve never had to remember anything before

Have a good weekend friends,

what’s the most obscure game that you consider at least 9/10

just slammed through a run of aladdin (snes) for the first time in at least 10 years and it only took ~an hour. still got it 😎

i have steam library blindness. i can’t tell the difference between one game in my library and another

You’re safe here, I’m a Shane Gillis republican. Only for the night though and then you must be on your way. These are dark days

[empties water bottle into the lake] “Go, you’re free now.”

it’s especially funny rn that americans have spent the last 100 years imagining themselves as principled, heroic cowboys standing up to the status quo

the only thing that can stop a bad guy with a death note is a good guy with a death note

a cunty girl makes due

give me the death note i can be trusted

They just tear-gassed us. They tried to run us over in a van holding a peaceful protester. They shot us with pepper balls. They dragged another protester into the facility.

i’m sitting here in full color! the third reich was in black and white!