For some reason I'm listening to football songs in the middle of the night and you really do have to respect how little effort went into rewriting the lyrics of Whole Again for the Southgate version. Go on girls. Give us absolutely nothing.

Some books recently

Reckon the worst thing about being born in 1992 is that until the day I die I will think 'motherfucker' when I hear/read the word riverside.

Resolving not to resolve to much because resolving leads to sadness and time is arbitrary? Here's a poem about how you can't fix your life with social media vibes: youtu.be/3R_FYKfn72Y?...

Some of our Books of the Year choices include Sarah Hall @faberbooks.bsky.social @emilycotterill.bsky.social @traceyrhys.bsky.social @anthonyshapland.bsky.social @lucyrosecreates.bsky.social @jay-griffiths.bsky.social & @clareshawpoet.bsky.social thelonelycrowd.org/2025/12/14/b...

Huge thanks to Taz for including Significant Wow in his books of the year. He describes the collection as 'an edgy, streetwise, alternative lens of self-hood' 💚🖤

One of those very normal poems I've written youtu.be/3R_FYKfn72Y?...

The 'I really liked the way that he respected me' bit in the Sugababes song 'Push the Button' is surely the most unintentionally devastating moment in 21st century pop culture. Like what a tragic thing to have written down and then sung Jesus Christ.

Thank you Mamdani for allowing me to learn that it is *discomfited* and not *discomforted*. Truly the people's champion.

In a devastatingly rude move Waterstones have put my pamphlet The Day of the Flying Ants on clearance! Does mean you can grab it for all of three quid should you feel the urge: www.waterstones.com/book/the-day...

I am so absolutely god awful at describing what Significant Wow is about. I might just get some pictures of this collage of brands printed out and hand it to people by way of explanation. emilycotterill.com/product/sign...

Notes made to myself presumably in the pursuit of poetry: - thin legged dads - sick in your hands on the backseat - on the days we know there are jacket potatoes for tea ???

I hear that Joy Division t-shirts are in the news thanks to the Aussies I don't know how often Anthony Albanese is drunk & he's about as far away from me as it's possible to be. That said I'd be a fool not to post this poem from my collection Significant Wow www.serenbooks.com/book/signifi...

I wonder what Ernest Hemingway would have to say about the number of unused baby shoes for sale on Vinted. Is this a poem or???

Remember, if you are going out in the hail showers today, pop a child's xylophone on your head for added fun.

Won £25 on the Premium Bonds but am gutted to be reminded that the email you get no longer says 'Good News From ERNIE About Your Premium Bonds'. That's a poem out the window ffs.

'They'll chisel fucking poet when they do you and that, yer cunt, 's a crude four-letter word.' 💔

Breaking up with Dan for saying 'the sort of shit you listen to, Britpop where the guy can't sing... PULP!'

Perk of being a dual income no kids person over 30 and not in London, brands are desperate for your cash and have no single clue how to speak to you. It's hilarious. It's joy. It's fodder.

Enjoyed speaking to the Swansea & District Writers' Circle last night. It is impossible to look good in a mid chat photo especially when you've spent six hours in the car that day 🚗 📚

Significant Wow spotted at The Bookshop By The Sea in Aberystwyth ❤️ 🌊 📚

Do I know anyone who knows an East Mids based poet who might be interested in reading with me at an Alfreton event?

Do I know anyone who knows an East Mids based poet who might be interested in reading with me at an Alfreton event?

Who wrote the line Gilmore Girls where Paris says she is an Anglophile and then references Neil Kinnock? Have they been held accountable for their crimes??

Went to the East Midlands to see old friends and came back with a current affairs poem.

Went to the East Midlands to see old friends and came back with a current affairs poem.

Looking forward to speaking to the Swansea and District Writers' Circle in September 🍂 swanseawriters.co.uk/september-20...

Fully thought Corbyn was sporting a dangly earring in this photo and honestly I'm here for it.

I maintain my anti-yarn-bombing stance but these lil guys, right by the rec that is the main inspiration for this poem, really did have me on the ropes for a moment.

Looking forward to speaking to the Swansea and District Writers' Circle in September 🍂 swanseawriters.co.uk/september-20...

26 year advance praise for Significant Wow. Buy your copy now, it's what Mrs Walls would want. emilycotterill.com/product/sign...

Answered the phone right at the end of Helter Skelter, so when I hung up Ringo Starr screamed 'FINGERS' at me...

If John Boyne doesn't believe in the T then *he* should have withdrawn from the longlist for an LGB**T**Q+ prize and then none of this would have happened to him?

I haven't done this yet but I think it's becoming increasingly important that I do.

Google AI serving up a piss take of the French is a hell of a thing 🧄

Have just typed up a poem about nicking glasses from pubs. Really tempted to name it Kiss The Alderman after one of Bob Mortimer's iconic beers. It's this kind of channelling really-quite-old-now internet content that's going to help poetry re-enter the mainstream right?

Discovered some early masterpieces 🎨

Please say their lawyer is like a little hedgehog in a suit with a briefcase

Popping over to LinkedIn for my daily dose of analytically redundant arguments from the 'woe is me' side of the private school VAT debate.

I'd neglected to do an update and so the shop on my website wasn't working. I know that's the only reason you hadn't bought 5 copies of Significant Wow directly from me and HOORAY because now it is fixed and you can do just that 🎊 On you go ⤵️ emilycotterill.com/product/sign...

It's low on the list of reasons that Amazon are awful but the fact that *they" invented their *own" event called Prime *DAY* and it's now 4 days long or whatever drives me up the wall.

Being in Cardiff the past few days one thing has become very clear to me: the real winner in this Oasis situation is whoever owns Adidas. Like DAMN.

I know it's not the point but this new party chat has reminded me of the world's most pathetic Nandos and I thank them for that lol

Thinking about the time in Year 1 that a boy called George claimed to have finished all his maths in about 10 minutes by copying all the sums from the board and insisting we didn't have to write in the answers.

The Daily Telegraph: here’s Britain’s answer to Rage Against The Machine 9 months later: We regret to inform you that Britain’s answer to Rage Against The Machine are political

Gazpacho is one of the main revenge dishes.

The way random Americans on talking head documentaries just completely randomly start chatting about Jesus always blows my mind. Absolutely chaotic.

Only 1500 John Major Toby Jugs were ever made. Make sure you hurry to the UK parliament shop

It's a resounding 'yikes' from the Whovians.