Yeah yeah yeah baseball SEABASS GETS THE CANES ON THE BOARD IN VEGAS!

This is the first season since I moved to Toronto that I didn’t go to a single Jays game. They were last place last year. I didn’t even know they were any good this season until like August. Meh. Go figure. I like seeing my city - and my country - happy. 🇨🇦

Okay, okay, *maybe* some of that good Blue Jays mojo can flow in the Leafs direction?

There’s some pretty important baseball being played in this big ol’ building I drive by 10 times a week or more. I just think that’s neat.

WHY WOULD YOU WALK INTO A GAME SEVEN SITUATION LIKE “WHAT WE NEED IN THIS ELIMINATION GAME IS SOME OF THAT TORONTO MAPLE LEAFS MOJO,” VLADDY?! WHY!?!? #WANTITALL

Weirdly enough, I’m wearing Northbound Leather on the right, but not on the left

What’d you do over the weekend? “Played hockey, watched the Jays, went to a friend’s housewarming party…and y’know, some other stuff…” (The other stuff)

Imagine having Seth Jarvis on your hockey team

I haven't had the capacity to keep up with moderation lists for a bit, but this one is really obvious, so I'm stealing some energy from Future Me: a list for the extremely obvious wave of inauthentic accounts following today's newly-created US gov accounts bsky.app/profile/did:...

Here’s some premieres of provinces with NHL teams with 1 or more losses, because some of us Caniacs live in Canada 🇨🇦

Go Canes!

THE /Canes ARE THE LAST REMAINING UNDEFEATED TEAM 🔥

Shayne Gostisbehere now has 4 straight games with at least a +2 plus/minus and one point in each game to start the season. The last player to accomplish this was Wayne Gretzky in 1988.

🐖 > 🦆 🐖 > 🦈 🐖 > 🔔 🐖 > 😈

I bet you feel a lot less shame when you’ve got buddies in the box with you.

It was nice of my kid’s league, the American League, and the NHL to coordinate starting times so I could watch all 3 with the perfect amount of overlap.

Oh, my bad… GOALIE FIGHT 🥊 #carolinaculture 🙄

GOALIE FIGHT 🥊

He might *say* he doesn’t want to get trucked by a 225-pound power forward, but look at what he’s wearing! Everybody knows he’s basically *asking* for hard contact, wearing an outfit showing all that padding.

Ooh! “What to Expect When You’re Expecting The End Times”

If you see me with a dumb grin on my face today, it’s probably because I came up with “Maybe the Real Apocalypse Was Inside Us All Along” as my sermon title for this Sunday.

The Thanksgiving surprise that happens when you open social media, see a few posts from down in the States, and realize Columbus Day is still a thing, apparently.

First base, second base, third base, flared base

So there was a guy with a, ummmm, *toy* on his shirt in the stands right behind home plate a minute ago when the guy with no jawline hit the homer.

“I once saw Vlad Sr. in an exhibition game at Knights Stadium, back when he was playing with the old Montreal Expos. He got hold of a fastball and hit the thing damn near to Pineville…” Is the kind of true statement that makes me feel like I should probably be more concerned about bone loss.

Funnily enough, this is the first year since I moved to Toronto I haven’t been to at least one Jays game. Clearly the baseball gods are savouring my absence.

If you’re a quarterback or a starting pitcher, I’m just gonna call you Bryce. Because that’s probably your name. That’s called “playing the percentages.”

Family stats from the week: 6 arenas visited 3 games played (3-0-0) 3 practices 2 games working the scorer’s table No skating for me - my league was off for Thanksgiving #hockeymom

I’m a Caniac and it’s Bo Time! Ma’am, this is a Tim Horton’s.

Ok, so he’s only gonna score 123 goals. Fine, I guess.

It’s world mental health day and I slept 11 hours and 14 minutes last night.

Me: K’Andre’s on pace for 164 goals My kid: Yeah, well, so’s Seth Jarvis. I bet K’Andre doesn’t finish the season at 164, though. Me: Uh, yeah - probably not. My kid: But Jarvis will! 🙄

Man, we took the lead and my radio feed hasn’t gotten there yet.

The Canes are absolutely dominating shinny at the rink across from my building tonight.

Tired: PK stick drop count Wired: Canes hit post count 🥴🫠

#CarolinaCulture is a clunker of a hashtag, but as a maybe 6th or 7th-generation North Carolinian, I’ve always said that Raleigh (& Charlotte, where our other pro teams live), are 2 of the most personality-neutral cities in any league. So I dunno? Can’t fault them for trying to counter that.

Toronto Etobicoke Mississauga

The “away” games in the ALCS are gonna be in either South Vancouver or Northwest Windsor 🇨🇦

OKAY BLUE JAYS!!!

I’ll say this, though: since baseball is so mind-numbingly, excruciatingly slow, when a cute player shows up on camera, he may well stay there for like 3 or 4 minutes at a time.

Every time a baseball team I semi-follow makes a postseason run, I’m like “dammit I’m gonna have to watch baseball, aren’t I?”

3 weeks into the season, and I’ve already had one goal waved off on account of this rule. When it happened last weekend, one of the refs skated over to the bench and said “I want to see you take that shot again.” I *will* score from outside the blue line.

Y’all I will #RaiseUp and #CauseChaos before using that new hashtag. Better #TakeWarning.

Someone at my pharmacy calls me about once a year to ask if I still have my uterus.

Oh, for sure, bud. ‘Cause every time I go home to North Carolina and attend a sporting event, I look around and think “wow, it’s like a Lady Gaga concert in here.”

A source confirmed to me what Frank Seravalli has reported, which is that the Hurricanes will not be signing Michael McLeod or Carter Hart.

Hell yes

Awesome

My email to all the Canes major players, plus about 10 corporate partners.

Re: The petition on Change.org with 1700+ signatures. Legal action? What’s going on?