Happy “this would’ve been Game 7 day but it’s not because the #Canes won it in 6” day to those who celebrate. #SoundTheSiren #CauseChaos

"I'm losing my voice and I really need to pee." Sometimes the t-shirts make themselves. www.nytimes.com/athletic/736...

Professional law firm attire. #CauseChaos #SoundTheSiren #Canes

I’m busy crying. I love all of you. LETS FUCKING GO CANES.

BREATHE. In for 4 Our for 6 Chug beer. Repeat breathing. #Canes #SoundTheSiren #CauseChaos

Alright #Canes fam…. Take a breath. Calm your mind. Stretch, and hydrate— I don’t give two shits if you shotgun a Bud Light. Just hydrate. #SoundTheSiren #CauseChaos

Okay #Canes fam, set those intentions, manifestations, and goals for the second and third periods. #SoundTheSiren #HockeyWitch #CauseChaos

Okay. One hour to go. I’m fine.

While I appreciate the suggestions I was looking for how to actually do it 🤦‍♀️ It’s probably really expensive……

So…. I’m thinking we should get him something special for his birthday. Thoughts?

Watching the #Canes win is the same thing as watching porn. I don’t make the rules. #SoundTheSiren

ONE MORE GAME WE JUST NEED ONE MORE GAME OMG BUSSI FOR PRESIDENT

#HockeyWitch #Canes

BITCHES WE BUZZING

So it began with tarps off, then dicks out, so by way of extrapolation, these flowers are #Canes fans?

Absolutely - we go with the undrafted goalie who never played in the NHL until last October. What a wild sentence to type. I LOVE YOU BUSSI LFG.

HUG BUSSI EVERYONE HUG THAT MAN RIGHT NOW HUG STAAL HUG EVERYONE.

Can someone please put that goal on a loop — forever? Thanks.

You know what I need to happen to Mitch Marner? I need him to be deeply concerned and lost in thought about whether or not he left a stove burner on. Or if he locked the door when he left home. Just 100% all consuming thoughts.

Okay — I upgraded from sage and think I have enough Palo Santo for the second period. #HockeyWitch #Canes #CauseChaos

We got a power play goal. ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE. Like chaos. More chaos please.

Just as I was screaming at finding no news online, my girl came through. #Canes #CauseChaos

What do I need to do to buy a goal? Do they want money? Airline miles? Hotel points? Free (albeit illegal I’m not a lawyer but close enough, been with them 20 years) legal advice within the state of NC??? A sandwich? A new sofa? #Canes I will pay you for a goal.

Instead of waiting for intermission I’m gonna go water my outdoor plants now…… 🤦‍♀️

Someone give the marketing team a raise. They just won the internet for the month of June and nothing can top this (pun absolutely intended).

I understand Martinook brought to life everything we’re feeling, but it’s still not too late to go crazy. Last I checked you can’t have a negative score in hockey. We’re at 0. It can’t get any worse, it can just get more insane. With less penalties. ✔️

Can we go back to #CauseChaos please? And I mean FULL CHAOS. It’s game two and we’re floundering. Change up every line there is and just go fully mental. Why? Because currently whatever we’re doing now clearly isn’t working, so fuck it.

How Stella Got Her Groove Back To The Future

I’m shutting the house down, turning the TV off, and preparing for iPad in bed mode. I’m not going to sleep, but I am begging the #Canes — for the love of all things unholy, win this thing in regulation. I’ll buy you cookies - you don’t want me to bake them.

I’m gonna need more #Canes to choose violence.

Okay cool so Ehlers woke up today and chose violence. Word. #Canes

Technically, it's not. It's 10:42 a.m., not 8:00 p.m. I'm at work pretending to do my job. I have no idea how the hell I'm going to pass the time today. It certainly won't be in a productive manner. Once I'm home I'll probably stress clean.

I’m thoroughly enjoying the Syankley Cup Playoffs. #Canes

It’s possible I’m vibrating with nervous energy at a frequency only dogs can hear. That’s fine. Go #Canes.

I haven’t figured out how to declare eminent domain over Colleton County in a South Carolina so I guess I’ll go home tomorrow.

WHHHYYYYYYYYYYYYY

Dear Freddie: I love you very much. Please don’t turn into a pumpkin. We need you. A lot. #Canes

I’ve never seen In Flames (Swedish death metal band). They do a lot of festivals and tours I can’t make time-wise, but I want to see them headline. So I told the universe that if they played any solo shows in the US this year I’d fly to where they were. Anyway, she listened. 🤘

Problems I rather enjoy having: I still haven’t washed this shirt since R1G1 because I’m a superstitious bitch. Took it camping over the weekend (because priorities even if I’m watching a game in a tent) and it smells mildly of campfire. #Canes

Permanant. Permenant. Permanent. Fuck yeah, nailed it in three. /flex

Things that epitomize Monday: a client e-mails me this long ass story about how they have a warrant out for their arrest. That's fine, I'll e-mail them back a time to come in. But NO - no, not at all. They end the e-mail with, "no need to reply I'm going to call you in a few minutes." 😑

*sweep sweep* #Canes

FISH FISH FISH FISH FISH. ❤️🖤🤍❤️🖤🤍❤️🖤🤍❤️🖤🤍

I’ve decided to burn some Palo Santo in the hopes of getting rid of the scourge that are the Senators. #Canes #HockeyWitch

Thank almighty fuck I love you Hall. I love hallways. Halls cough drops. Hall closets. I LOVE ALL HALLS #Canes

I am willing to pay a lot of money for any Hurricane there to shut this crowd the entire fuck up. Just the whole way utterly silent. Please score a goal #Canes so that we can send these pieces of wet lettuce to the golf course.

I suppose it’s too much to ask for a shorthanded goal now yes? #Canes

0% surprised it was Stankoven. But thank you. I love you. You are perfect to me.

I am asking literally anyone to get a goal for the #Canes and shut this crowd up.

Saw this on my workout today. 1. Outstanding message. 2. We really don’t use the word “holler” enough. 10/10 sticker on a pole.