Stop telling your boyfriend you love him, it only makes him worse,

Some of you are the very opposite of me and I believe this represents you.

You’re trying to watch a movie together then you look over and she’s scrolling her phone, you ask what’s happening and she says “they found a spider mega city in albania.” twenty minutes earlier she denied everyone being twelve.

Manifesting

Conor post your portfolio challenge.

babe the pope went woke for your sins you need to stop behaving like this

fork found in fork factory next to schematics of fork

We now offer a skull measuring service for a reasonable fee.

I did it

Who else hates sleep?

I know this is unpopular but a last minute Jays loss could lead to Ontariens learning how to burn cars which would be a spiritual growth experience for tgat whole country which would be good. (Québec is its own country under occupation).

smoking kools and listening to AM rock and roll

Went looking at my old angel posts

Do you know why I’m expensive, because things break around me unfortunately that’s why my life is cheap would i pluck the wings off an angel, probably if it asked politely, so many tiny feathers all kitten soft all kitten smell

Some times I’m having a bad day until I remember

high enough to eat a sandwich, too high to get one.

Oh you met our son, no young Clobert isn’t legally an imbecile but he is an insufferable idiot. There was a period in his youth where he insisted everyone call him “rock clobster.” Well we confiscated all of his reading materials from the orient and that fixed it. Unfortunately he’s a pervert now.

Shameful erasure of adult women who survived tummy aches.

Weird dream, was hooking up with the younger brother of a college roommate who showed with their wife? then someone started making some weird american “delicacy”, large beef hotdogs with melted cookies wrapped around the outside in the kitchen and I was like I don’t think I’m eating and I’m topless

Jocktoberfest

Is this really a situation for “B Little”?

what’s two times 8?

America’s first general strike

I seriously do think one of the best things about baseball is that every game threatens to be eternal

Baseball is female coded because it’s about the pauses.

I saw that cat

« In every little Honda there may lay a Peter Fonda »

My main function in life is reminding people that damon albarn or whatever has broke dick.

If you wake up at 2am on a work night get high and immediately start listening to sad girl music.

Nice skill issue, how long have you been dating him? Oh I’m sorry was I being ableist against losers again, I’m trying to put my mean girl era behind me.

There is so much valuable information on the internet.

Smoking a joint in bed levels of wellbeing and work life balance.

Listening to a guy learn about remote viewing from chatgpt… this isn’t going to help me fall asleep

In France you’re not allowed to do this, that’s how we stay normal. If adults want to do something “cool” they engage in our traditional hobbies like pulling off heists at the Louvre.

I’m going to make your spouse haunted for halloween, I just want you to be emotionally prepared.

Your economy fact for the day. When a line goes up, that’s growth.

If your man is still mired in positional warfare find yourself a woman who believes in initiative.

Maybe america should have a holiday about different person born in territories that once belonged to the republic of Genoa, you know want a Napoleon Day holiday just admit it already.

babe, babe are you listening to me? I said the Pope is coming to dinner tonight and he’s woke so babe I need you to promise me really promise me you won’t say anything problematic, no podcast talk babe they say this Pope is woke ok babe

The Girl From Ipanema is really about anorgasmia.

They don’t even have real freedom liquors in america.

I’m so happy americans aren’t real and are just an amusing distraction created by The Archons.

Sipping on ibuprofen.

I’m so glad tomorrow is Friday.

How many days do we have left in this week surely no more than two hopefully.

You could be comfortably lit and listening to mid 80s rai tracks right now.

The future belongs to those who can make bathtub gin.