I’m writing my first book! It’s called Stop Giving Me Wine and Letting Me Use My Phone

Cumsessions 🤌🏼💦

I want MTV back. There should be an app similar to Spotify or Apple Music where you make a playlist but then it connects you with the music videos for each song and then you can stream it to your tv for parties.

“If you read a copy of The NY Times today, that would be the same amount of information that someone would receive in their lifetime 100 years ago.” In their LIFETIME. 😵‍💫 I go back and forth every day and every day I’m closer to deleting all social media for this exact reason.

“I’m over these white farm boys with rosacea.” - Tara venting about Penn State quarter backs for the last 15 years

If you don’t talk to me in an uber you get an extra tip 😇 (Honestly sometimes I really enjoy the convos and talking to people from different walks of life. But I still value my peace lol)

A Stevie and Lindsey album, a new Taylor album, and a new Kid Cudi album all happening in the next few months! Gonna be a good fall 🍁🎶

I feel like my Blue Sky timeline is what used to just be a group chat amongst friends many moons ago

Vacation is great. The ocean is healing. Family is amazing. Day drinking is fun. But the BEST thing about the beach is…. OUTDOOR SHOWERS!!!!

I just wanna talk about the Idaho trial with someone without feeling like a complete psychopath

My chiropractor cracks my neck every session and it always reminds me of Blue Crush. So I like to lay there and pretend I’m Anne Marie and I just got ROCKED by some waves

I couldn’t focus on anything the whole show except for this guys wing span

#phish #pick5 Ghost Ghost Ghost Ghost Halfway to the Moon *Booth Love encore

The Beach Boys loved nitrous I know it

The Spins by Mac Miller is an absolute anthem

I need to hear an evil Ghost this weekend

Set break vibes

CPS is laying off and I got the cut today. Feels weird. Always thought I’d have job security as a teacher. I’ve been feeling pulled to find work outside of education so I’m choosing to view this as a sign from the universe. Teaching is not what it was 10 years ago. Anyway…(continued)

The full moon in paintings 🌕 ⋆⭒˚.⋆

Portugal has been amazing but I miss broccoli and Kula

Moving to the Azores so I can drink pineapple wine and introduce sea turtles to Phish

Kristi is in the bathtub Making soup for the ambassadors And MJ is in the hallway Singing to the troubadours

Fuqqqq me upppp

HOLY SMOKES ALERT. This stuff is fire.

Portuguese people are wild. I’m just watching this hot girl fuck around with a soccer ball and ~lazily~ do perfect rainbow flicks. ::taking deep spiritual notes for next lifetime::

If I had to measure I’d say I just ate a pint glass of raw fish and I am stoked

JIMMINY CRICKET 🦗🏏 IT’S ALISSA’s BIRTHDAT!!! CRANK DAT. BIRTH DAT ASS OVER TO CHICAGO SO WE CAN ADOPT MORE SEA CRITTERS AND HAVE MORE CUDDLE PUDDLES AND HISS AT THE MOON IRL. ILY!!!Have the best day and night ever! You are the COOL kind of cancer and I hope your emotions are all happy ones today🌊💙🦀♋️

I wanna go back to EF and I wanna go back now. Literally cried during the end of Zeds Dead. They have no business finishing their show with Pure Imagination > Imagine. Everyone was hugging and crying because WHO WOULDN’T BE! 😭🥹🖤

Monday Mood😴 #WolfConservation #HappyMonday

Turtle Mutual Aid:

My girl likes to party all the time. (I’m the girl. It’s me.)

Last day with students today. Flex day tomorrow. Kinda wanna get Reiki this weekend

MJ: “Did you just get a text message about a new piece of clothing from Anthropologie?” Me: “Yes.”

This sweet woman had a little flower stand of bouquets she grew, picked, and put together herself! Like a lemonade stand but for flowers! Genius idea 💐 I’ve always wanted to be a florist but I’m not a business gal. This would be a cool little side hustle!

Biking is incredibly stressful for me and I wish it wasn’t so 😅🥲 But I’ll walk an hour on foot to get somewhere! I can control my legs pretty well

We found a Jesse in the wild

Time to…SPREAD EM WIDE

@icculus.bsky.social Otherworld is so good 😱😱😱 just listened to episode 1 and I’m immediately hooked

ISO a sunscreen for the summer that is: 1. Clean (rates green on Yuka) 2. Rubs in (not about that zinc life) 3. Doesn’t break the bank I feel like all the recs on Yuka are all zinc and I’m not THAT scared of the sun (I tan easily) Just wanna do my part in protecting my skin

Find yourself an MJ 🖤

Heaters don’t count in Europe

A day in the life 🙂‍↔️

This is weird but I’m gonna drink the whole thing

Saxophones are cool cus they sound amazing in every genre of music

1. New Girl 2. Gilmore Girls 3. Vampire Diaries 4. Always Sunny

Everyone better be blasting Fleetwood Mac today! 🫵🏼 Magic exists because of this woman🖤🎶🔮✨HBD queen