my papa :(

dad just died and now the damn tarot readers are on my fyp could this week get any worse

it was expected but it still feels too young to lose a parent

just joined this club!

is it an angel number or is it that i leave work at 4:30 and commute 14 minutes away

one time in high school my best friend did the sugar free gummy bear challenge in english class and our teacher (actual saint) got so pissed off that she made us line up in the hall like children for bathroom breaks for like a month.

meeeeeee!!

took a vyvanse to do schoolwork and all it did was make me write down the payments i’ve made via mychart.

8 years ago i did psychedelics for the first time and threw up dry animal crackers in a speedway men’s restroom

i made pizza dough with my yeast infection and now i have white spots on my tongue.

breaking: alt couple purchases home

purchasing a home outfit

if my cat was human he would definitely wear a “real men wear pink” shirt and blue cargo shorts and be sticky

cats are so fucking cool and if you hate them you’re a sick freak

i’m surprised my cat hasn’t ran away today from how mean i’ve been to her. i wouldn’t let her get inside the dryer or eat avocado.

i close on my house today

i am never giving up kerrygold butter or medical pedicures despite having a mortgage.

good pussy will have you laid up like “damn the little ones are totoro too”

i’m taking sexy photos of myself while my husband cleans.

if you’re so evil then what’s the worst thing you did???

i think i’m disgusted by all men right now

my son, Rad, enjoys mapping fences and coffee breaks

i picked this radish out of a cover crop because he looked nice so he’s going to work with me today. happy government opening!

sprinkle sprinkle

#1 thing to text your manipulative situationship: i’m pregnant

the most unnecessary side effect of menstruating is diarrhea.

can we please normalize playing with legos without instructions……

a journey through cat scent girl cat: air dried laundry and lilac and a coffee shop with a hint of flaked salmon boy cat: fish pile with poop on it

i love just dance i want to play just dance everyday i love when i get a new high score

always remember that they exclude you bc you’re that girl and they’re jealous

people don’t need to be sober to receive food, shelter and kindness.

“venus ruled signs are the prettiest signs in the zodiac” nice try

guys i want more attention but im already in a masters program and got married. should i try asking for prayers on facebook

UK UofL game tonight cats by 1000 and i’m drinking a trillion beers and smoking cigarettes in the house

my artist finished up my web and he said “yeah i can totally touch it up for you whenever since the knee is a difficult spot” sir, you are never going near this tattoo again.

we survived on half of our income for 40 days for what?

if you hate snow like this post and i’ll deliver an 80° lavender summer sunset to you

snow is like what if depression and car wrecks and death would be weather and yall mfers are like “i 🙂❤️love snow”

certified winter hater. fuck winter and idc give a goddamn about christmas either argue with the wall

really into the christmas spirit already. slid on black ice coming into work then ate a christmas tree cake. fuck ass season.

going to girlmer now (girl gamer) (stardew valley)

the tattoo for reference

got a tat 2 on my knee it hurt really bad like ow owwwwwww

happy friday from the girls

would you rather be locked in a room with a man who is a drummer or one who is a car guy

🧙‍♂️🔮

btw i’ve been on gov shutdown so i’ve been approaching Ben Wyatt status for a couple weeks.

the gynecological survey revealed that my pussy is too fierce so they must remove my genes from the pool

smoking on something miscellaneous