socal electrical utility companies aren't the way they are because of profit-driven behaviours or just gross negligence. it's because i keep chewing on all their damn wires

get your mind into the butter

Modern medicine had the perfect opportunity to give people elixirs and potions but instead put everything in pill form. I don't want to take two paracetamol with a glass of water, I want to crack open a vial and dramatically down the contents.

you're telling me an entire drum of bass composed this song?..

my heart is black with hatred and my ass is turgid with lust

e-girl, e-boy, & e-waste. the three genders

gazing at gazebos

sipping and slurping my fizz and foam

you'll never witness me being out of pocket. i'm staying squarely tucked in there

better to be a house cat than a mouse rat

filling myself with flan about it

i tend to unload when not nearby anyone else.. and if left alone for too very long, i'll just despawn

getting a husband stitch on my zero-depth neopussy

bodyaches too painfully intense.. need a complete bodyectomy

things would be vastly different right about now if humans could just lay eggs

getting my hair braided like challah dough

please come pick me up.. i have a pussyache

pathetically succumbing to my terminal illness (tummy hurt)

giving my squirrel bf a nutjob

americans would maybe be a bit less weird and xenophobic about MSG if it had a more marketable name . something like Salt 2

what if the climate is changing for the better, actually

i still exist. sorry

hi

planning on haunting a gameboy cartridge someday

pleepy slunt

there are only two real genders: linux transfem, and ketamine transfem

i took a picture of you before you posted this, thanks.

that decade-old "planking" fad was actually just a collective indulgence in our animalistic & instinctual need to sploot

i'm medically diagnosed with disc rot

freezing batteries

Lightly tap A to perform a smaller jump

microwaving ice

there are only two genders.. either you're born from an ussy, or you're generated within a vat of glowing liquid

feelin like a freak (gay) of nature (furry)

splooting cutely

the lords (state of california) give their toughest battles (jury summons to a distant courthouse in a big city) to their strongest soldiers (an agoraphobic & pathetically anxious little thing)

i'm honestly kind of good at taking medicine .. i don't even need it wrapped in cheese most of the time

i haven't been having the energy to speak much, recently,.. so

truly the worst part of being something that uses it/its, is realizing just how few people actually know the difference between "its" & "it's"

i love to culturally appropriate my own culture. i love blueberry bagels

i just know that my dear boywife will age well into being a lovely boybushka someday

eating a bowl of dirt

frotting but with tails .. like, rubbing tails together, and its frotting.. . but like, tailfrotting. ..

"spheroid" is a slur. just like "femoid"

genitals were not intended for reproduction, nor for any kind of sex, really. they were actually meant to just be a fun stimmy toy for your partner

this bitch again..

i'm not a puppygirl just because i howl and awoo at full moons.. i'm actually just appropriating their culture

not sure that i'd ever be willing to date someone who wouldn't want to live in a video game sewer level with me

tgirl, tboy, & tbell. the three genders

wanting to mutate in a way that lets me eat wood