If miracles happen and voter will actually overcomes the gerrymandered and stolen Dem seats in the midterms, Trump will say “We changed the map, they must have cheated to win the maps we changed”.

If professional sports teams take a single dollar from taxpayers to build a stadium, all locals paying tax should NEVER have to pay a cent for a stupid app or Chanel to watch the games. MLB doesn’t care about local fan bases, but expects us to keep paying to be fans.

HOLY COW!!! @cubs WALKOFF!! HOLYSHITHOLYSHITHOLYSHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Best spots in the Sphere show was the graphic reproduction of CK5s robot light rig. At least from the house. Good stuff!!!

Dummy’s who think their employers are “paying” their healthcare. Hey buddy!!! That $1100 a month they pay could go straight into your check. More than offsets an extra 10-15% tax hike for socialized medicine

MLB parks don’t have a box office anymore. Just a little old lady telling u to get your tickets online. Really wild.

Where is congress right now?

Incredible baseball stat. Exactly half the teams that opened yesterday lost their first game. 161 more to go. China up folks.

Seeing pics of unmasked ICE agents in airports made me figure out that they aren’t hiding their identities, they are hiding THEIR STUPID FACIAL HAIR. OMG…. Like every one of em has a bad goatee or beard.

The poor people of Venezuela must be sooooohappy right now. Good game boys. Good game.

Fun fact… Israel has nationalized healthcare for everyone!! Oh…. They also tell us when to go to war with countries that are minimally dangerous to 99.999% of US citizens. HAPPY WAR TO ALL, and to all a Happy War!!!!!

"One Long Pair of Eyes"  Recorded at Acheron Studios in Nashville, TN 

My Social media algorithms ALL think I’m a HUGE hockey fan because I’ve been reading so many posts about the USA Bros and Kash McParty director. Make it stop please.

FU to anyone crying about just landing lawns or 300s. Booooooo!!!!!!!!! #phish

Women’s Pro Hockey should b bigger than the WNBA.

Everything I know about bobsledding, I learned from Cool Runnings.

Here u go @emilysue.bsky.social My son in the hat playing a free show for ya. Sry my camera is kinda crappy.

So Bondi has a list of an “immigrant crime” in every dem district so she can play gotcha to totally unrelated questions? Such a genius. 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮

If u just kinda like Bad Bunny. PLEASE check Manu Chao.

Gonna tell the kids this was the 2026 Super Bowl alternate halftime.

On my 5th season of The Crown and a little let down. At what point does Paddington show up to hang w QE2?

So excited to find out what MAGA gets offended by during Olympic opening ceremony. The suspense is LITERALLY KILLING ME!!!

My reminder to please google “PAM BONDI STEALS DOG”. You’re welcome.

The entire world is laughing at us for electing an uneducated clown bully. Thank you for your attention to this matter.

My YEARLY REMINDER that Intuit/Turbotax straight up bribes congress ti NOT have a FREE tax software for all Americans like EVERY OTHER country does. Thank you for your attention to this matter.

Well… Henry Ford was an admitted antisemite who liked Hitler, so suspending an employee who truthfully called Trump a Pedo Protector really tracks.

semi-regular reminder that ICE was only created in 2003 when you are asked to imagine a world without ICE, you're basically being asked to remember where you were when Lilo & Stitch came out

Krusty Noam keeps calling them the “brave men of ICE”. If they’re so brave. Why r they wearing fucking masks?

Clicked on the Melania movie trailer for some sick reason. Now I feel so much shame.

NFL Announcers shouldn’t politic close plays under review to obvs influence the challenge outcome. #jaguars #Bills

Thinking about Bob Weir…. He looked like such an old man to me at the end of the Jerry days to me back then. Realizing now that he was 8 years younger than I am today. Travel well Bobby.

I just can’t deal w Bobby dying AND the dirty Packers taking the Bears outa the playoffs on the same day. I need a miracle.

50% of ICE recruits believe professional wrestling is real.

Didn’t have Minnesota being the start of the next civil war on my Apocalypse Bingo Card.

I like my presidents who don’t fall asleep while they announce an unjustified kidnapping of a foreign leader.

We r living in a real life SNL sketch.

SPOILER ALERT…. Tonites gag involves Jarred from Subway.

Where is Pam Bondi?

Can we get a constitutional amendment that disqualifies anyone who is an Asshole by all basic metrics from holding public office? Seems pretty basic.

“Trump signs order classifying fentanyl as 'weapon of mass destruction'”. As a paramedic who gives fentanyl as a primary pain med, what does that make me?

Reading a bio of Joseph Kennedy. During the FDR admin, even the smallest bit of misinformation released was considered an impeachable offense. SO WILD!!!!

I miss the days when our parents told us orange juice was healthy and that you couldn’t start a healthy day without a huge glass of it. Ugh. I hate it now.

If u really focus on Kash Patels tiny suit, it makes it waaaaaay easier to ignore his fucked up looking face.

Phish Sphere announcement freaks me out…. In the 90s, as a 23 years old barista, I could afford to fly, lodge and see a full Grateful Dead run at the silver bowl… As a 55 year old with a great paying career, I can’t do more than couch tour this one. Life is strange and youth is wasted on the young.

I don’t beat my children, but I do kinda yell at em when I find out they still use Spotify from time to time.

Are Comey and James going to get an uncontested 250MM settlement from Bondi for vindictive prosecution?

Now ask MBS about the Saudis and 9-11……. Seriously.

Bills fans have become the most annoying fans on the planet. How’d that happen?

So do we all get fired from our jobs if we shit talk Cheney?