how to talk to your child about a blueberry muffin that had very few blueberries in it

It goes like this - the pee, the piss, The minor fart and the major shit, The baffled king was having diarrhea.

Truly. They have antipopes to worry about.

(watching porn) “Does that hurt the horse?”

mad respect

If maga people want to drink the pool water we should let them

sure fine we all have to ride Scott Pelley’s dick now

it is insane that Shakespeare probably never did cocaine

Matthew Lillard criticized the industry for prioritizing celebrities over voice actors in animation: “The ability to carry a film, as the lead of a film with only a voice, is a power very few people have. The idea that they keep hiring crappy celebrities to carry huge films is killing us.”

New “Dick Poop” just dropped

It’s the most sketch packet time of the year!

It’s the most sketch packet time of the year!

We don’t talk about this one enough. Wiggum is walking a tightrope only he can see.

Scared Straight Speaker: I BET A LOT OF YOU THINK ITS A COOL IDEA TO “CATCH PRINT”

We need a National Registry of Perfect Jokes

I volunteer as whatever

there’s really only one acceptable pose for a dragon at rest

when I like a Dream Pop song

whatever else is going on, a candidate saying this and a governor who'd say this are a step up

"Anthropic is the clean coal of AI. And clean coal doesn't exist" - Karen Hao speaking at Hay yesterday.

Climbing Documentary Participant: As soon as Tim broke onto to the scene, we were like “Damn! This dude’s gonna die AWESOME!”

The most creative thing about AI is the beautiful and unique way each slopeater screams into their collective void. “Ideas, thoughts, and general things.”

I hope the intersex pope is doing well over in the conclaverse

Terrible price for a quarter. Can find them much cheaper.

can anyone recommend a most healing balm?

not sure this means she’s actually trained to do anything

Introduced my children to the croupier who will care for them in the event of my death

imagine how good it must feel to get murdered here

few things scarier than the faces a man who is sorta good at bowling makes while bowling

i can only assume this is french for ‘why is john travolta dressed like curtis sliwa on his wedding day’

Inventing a full pseudoscience out of Bootlicking - gotta respect the neo-liberal hustle

When I ask ChatGPT if I should seek out a mental health professional or continue planning a mass shooting with its guidance

“W - as in ‘dowager.’”

We’ll never know for sure what kind of gamer John Adams would have been, but here are our best guesses

Thank you Mark Zuckerberg for spending hundreds of billions of dollars to give us this perfect encapsulation of the usefulness of generative AI

Guessing these clubs were made before 2007

his full name is Fabio Majora

MLB is playing with pink bats to celebrate Dog Penis Day

big weekend plans (hometown visits!)

So Mark Zuckerberg’s best pitch for using Meta AI is generating your own versions of Kurt Cobain’s suicide

I used to fear the Hantavirus - then I saw what it could do for the economy

I would guess most Fremen women don’t squirt

this is the one they recommend

please respect my brother’s gayness at this time

Darth Vader getting drunk with stormtroopers “I ever tell you guys I used to pod race?”

There needs to be a national reckoning about the diarrhea I am having.

Goodbye, get lost, and we'll see you soon.