Me: can you sing wheels on the bus? Baby: wheel wheel wheel, dat a bus! Me: perfect

Update: the listserv is now doing the thing where they've convinced themselves the duck NEEDS food and water and a kiddie pool. (She does not; mallards typically nest decently far from water, and this one is right in the correct range.) Ugh.

The best part of the week so far: there's a duck nesting at the community garden, and the guy with the plot she's in started a listserv for duck updates, triggering a reply-all fiasco of people requesting to get the duck updates.

I am working on my HABITS. I am FLOSSING. I am eating OATMEAL. I am taking LITTLE WALKS. This is exhasting.

Me: does adobe sign let you do a post-signature url redirect? Claude: yeah it's in Account Settings → Send Settings → "Redirect signers to a URL after signing" Me: it does not make sense for that to be an account level setting at all. Are you sure? Claude:

The baby is drinking milk and watching me pour more bottles for his lunch box: “another milk!” He’s too smart.

Copilot was not “enshittified,” lol

The baby all weekend: “it stuck it stuck it stuck” at anything that won’t bend to his very limited fine motor skills; “it hot it hot it hot” to anything perceptibly above room temp

My kid looking at a picture of a classmate: "Myle. Myle. More!" Apparently we like Myles!

Is it like a law in Philadelphia that every block has to have one house with a bunch of people who don't know how to live in a society hellbent on ruining everything for everyone, or

My toddler any time we pass someone's driveway on the push bike: [yanks handlebars towards private property] "up up up up up!"

Me: “mama’s coffee” Baby: 👀 “mama cock-ee” Me: “yep exactly”

The desire of managers to use AI to find employees to punish for something, anything, is gross. If someone's not "submitting enough pull requests per week," their manager should already know if that's because they're working on something huge and complex, or doing nothing.

@upmasingh.com thank you for organizing a meetup, I'm gonna try to make it to this one!

Whereabouts of missing Rep. Tom Kean (R-N.J.) remain unknown, but he’s trading stocks again. From today’s @notus.com newsletter:

The panic of trying to figure out how you’ll spend your one free hour per morning sans-baby and job. Cleaning the bathroom ain’t it.

why are people arguing about bluesky this morning? it’s a rainy day. you could be out there getting drenched and falling ill

I wonder how many times I heard the word “truck” today. I estimate eight hundred thousand

Just got bashed in the face with a giant bubble wand tube

The baby is learning “it’s hot,” which he chooses to pronounce hee-haw

Husband: “hey, what does mama say?” Baby: “mama.” Husband: “what does dada say?” Baby: “mooooooo.”

I can only assume based on how I feel every day that if I had one of those fitness wearables with a readiness score, it would simply tell me that I am dead

So impressed with our little guy, who has more and more words every day. His teachers always say “he’s talking so much!!” when I come pick him up, and he loves to bring us books to read out loud. Today he tried to wrangle a spatula out of the dishwasher and reported: “it stuck.”

SpaceX just disclosed $4.7 b in revenue in the last quarter which obviously gets you to a $2 trillion valuation

81% in and his lead has been widening. Congrats rep Rabb! We’ll miss you in Mt Airy but I’m sure we’ll see you around.

I will say, as someone currently represented by Rabb…he’s the only politician I feel like I’ve really ever seen on these Philly streets. You run into the guy. He once talked to me for quite a while about septa funding. You get the impression that he doesn’t feel like he’s above anyone.

I don’t understand how it’s possible to have a clean house and a job and a kid. Do you just not.

The baby: outside! Me: outside, I know Him: outside! Me: I know Him: outside!! Me: I know Him: I know

The ceo desire to automate the mother

Told the baby he was being very good this morning and he replied “yeah? Yeah? Ok.” Pretty sure he doesn’t know what any of that means, lol.

We have decided in this particular instance that harvesting all your data might get us sued if our product tells you to drink bleach, so here, court-proof AI chat! apple.news/ALNMaFgxIQGK...

I can't believe y'all are posting about good omens still. Jesus.

The baby puts his little hand on the wall. Me: wall! Him: wah! *runs around touching every wall* wah! wah!

Somehow, not kidding, I found a folder in my gdrive “shared with me” called something like “contents of trash bags (graphic)” and a bunch of image files. The way I did NOT click on any of that shit and removed myself. What the hell.

Every day I lose a teeny little bit of faith in everything.

The baby opens a book about farms. “Apple. Baaaaa. Dog. Milk. Tra-tor.” He hops when he sees a bunny and rocks when he sees a rowboat. Geez he’s learning fast.

What I’ve learned about Reddit is that someone is always finding a human jawbone somewhere, yet having no idea what it is.

Spinach, mixed lettuce, arugula.

The toddlers are getting vicious, man. Mine got bit, and then scratched the shit out of my neck on purpose (would not let him throw all the mulch out of a parking lot mulch pit) and also passed me a 24-hour stomach bug that had me tied to the bathroom alllllll day Wednesday. Fucking woof.

Was a rough week both personally and professionally, so I’m going to engage in a little community garden therapy.

The baby awakes. “Book. Paci. Milk. Cookie. Truck. Dada.” He’s right, too.

Me trying to learn everything about the hantavirus before my cousin tell the group chat you can cure it with black seed oil

Thrilled to have spotted a dude wearing a Sad Dads shirt at daycare. This daycare is great because every one of us is like 38.

Have reached the stage where, when I enter the baby's room in the morning, he yells MAMA!

We grew pole beans in the yard last year, and every time the bay finds an old one in the grass he yells BEAN!!!! even when it’s actually a pebble

I have encountered my fist AI kids video: various toy trucks needing to be towed from somewhere they got stuck. Someone sang “the firetruck is covered in soot and ash, help!!” while the visual was a truck stuck in a lake, lol.

I know everyone has seen this already, but the fact that he gives it a female name the instant he thinks it’s conscious and sucking up to him is fucking disgusting. I just wanted to say that plainly.

Guys it finally happened. someone asked about the black bird with red wings and I got to tell him its name

Baby language: currently pronouncing cracker as “cra-quoir” and it’s perfect.