weird internet experience: having people tell me theyre glad i stoppes being friends with someone theyre friends wirh becauze they thought their friend was grooming me. never said anything about it while we were friends though. this has happened multiple times.

i want the same affect with chamberland. theres no reason to be segmenring them into good or bad. save that for a different story. this is about people who make the wrong choices.

everyone should strive to have a fear and hunger esque fandom. anything more and its fail.

*realizes ive drawn sugar with a belly button* FUCK.

VENUS a mini comic about girls night uniting us all 1/2

i had the childhood of one of those human weapons but instead of torturing me into being good at killing they tortured me to make pictures and be decent at art analysis

talking about chamberland is always so funny. yeah you know. how theyre all aliens. something ive totally mentioned before

Rape World

i should draw. sugar at the begining of his story and sugar at the end.

my dads a transinclusive homophobe.

the thing is i feel like ive handled a lot of my rage ans anger symptoms really well. however. that has become to warp around. i am good at handling my temper with other people face to face or socially. on the internet about my nerd stuff though. uh oh!

has to hold myself back from losing my mind to nerd rage

speaking of which i should do some mock up posters and advertisements with sugar.

At the begining of Chamberlands, Sugar doesnt know how old he is. He works full time as a model and a "mascot/persona" for Chamberland in a way I can only compare to ryans wold. He knows very little, he can't cook for himself or clean. This is the version of Sugar I draw the most.

sugars growth as a person actually makes him less human and less of a character to me and more of a force of narrative. my characters act as forced of narration.

i think one of 5he main reasons i have a hard time talking about my ocs whether it be chamberlands or birdlime is because those function more as Characters than they do a timeless oc. and most of my "ocs" fit as this, none of them have static identities they can be characterized as in my head.

somwtimes i get very freaked out over random things before realizing why. my entire adult life ive never gone outside with my hair in a bun. why? a deep fear that i will look "inhuman."...? only just now realized its a correlation between being an ex ballerina and being dehumanized because of it

isnt it strange that cringe has become such a quick signifier for certain things that theres a cringetober prompt going around that lists "cringe" things to be into as prompts. hey? whats going on?

ive stopped drawing a lot of different faces because i love the big round nose too much but its so awesome that i cant stop

i think i prefer the term "otherkin" than just "kin." kin sounds like 2018 to me. otherkin sounds like 2014 to me, and thats usually what im talking about.

making a pumpkinbrrry for halloween

how i felt and acted growing up.

i want to try and revamp him.

thinking about this image an ex of mine drew of my old fursona. and how ive been broken up with not once not twice but three times because i liked homestuck too much. 😅 sorry

they gotta stop teasing me with hauntswitch man theyre gonna have me hooked for fucking ever arent they

brushed orby

its funny how orbys design was made to be the epitome of cute that people like to hurt and the first drawing i did with them was about how cuteness wouldnt be so bad if people didnt use cute aggression as an excuse to cause pain. everyone wants to cause it pain but it will survive

woke up to someone making animal abuse jokes on a piece of fanart i got of Orby. they were a minor, but man it made me really uncomfortable. i just wish they made the joke on any of my other designs. jokes about animal abuse are generally socially acceptable for contrarian reasons but it just makes

ill be honest im extremely paranoid about how my art is percieved too, i complain a lot about artists not letting teenagers bully their art and leaving it be, but i do think their fear is like. justified. i see things like homestuck and willwood and the reception they get and get very scared.

like talking to my boyfriend about the epilogues is so eye opening because to be honest man i thought they were fucking hilarious. the fact that they were posted on ao3. the taglist. the weird dog dick breast milk incest shit like they hit every beat of what people were doing to THEIR characters

a lot of people my age really, really hate hussie. and one of the major things thats always followed with criticisms i hear is that they hate their audience. and thats one ill never understand as a criticism. of fucking course they do? are you kidding me? have you ever once created anything?

APARENTLY HAUNTSWITCH HAS BEEN CONFIRMED TO BE IN PROGRESS RECENTLY!? OK THAT I KNOW I WILL BE ANNOYING ABOUT

my point is though that at least in the communities im in (very niche homestuck blog-style tumblr communities) is that many of these people have been playing a specific character for YEARS. like i'm not really an outlier when i say that i've been rping mituna/psii for 13 years, that's still less

kinning, DID and roleplaying like all intersect in multiple ways but they hate eachother.... guys...... we are all the same...

ive been so happy since angel got me my bedframe. happiness increase. im taller now

... and he wouldn't mind doing that whole getting-electrified bit again, either (commission for @toonsntractions.bsky.social) [Originally posted February 16, 2024]

to be clear forever that when im speaking about kinnies, i am speaking about spiritual kinnies who were writing about their kin memories and making shrines to themselves and shit. i am not talking about the regular teenager "kin means identifying with" type of kinning. i hope thats clear.

my ex was super into those specific art critic youtubers and also people like lavandertowne (does she count) and would regularly post my art online with his other friends to make fun of and i think about that a lot because he's given up art now after realizing he cant make it in the industry

sometimes the internet and transness get conflated a bit too much and people start writing things that sound like the opening to a transhumanism future metaverse tedtalk.

i hope that people know when i make a joke about my ego and feeling superior to people its meant to lighten the blow of whatever im saying. a lot of the time i tack it on to remind people im a judgemental asshole LOL.

tumblr artists obsession with the "blorbo fandom" is a runoff of the sites mass kin psychosis from 2013-2018 and has caused adults to develop a feeling that if there isnt The Character to latch onto than it isn't art "for them" and is art "for the artist" so they leave it be and don't look with

*remembers he dies in a mine shaft and gets so excited i start screaming and barking like a stressed dog*

yearning #OurPermanentVacation #opvcomic

what was that article i saw earlier this week that was like "build a bear was saved by the new 'kidulting' trend" its like im actually gonna blow my brains out.

my keyboard was fucking up really badly while watching the homestuck pilot and i punched the fuck out of it to try and get it to work bc i was so upset and shortly after karkat punched his own and it broke in two. well.