This would only cover 12,500 tolls at $2 million each, or a hundred days worth at pre-war rates. So really Prez Biznessdeals nailed it, awesome job there, baldy.

More DOJ misconduct, this time in their efforts to extort medical info from a hospital. DISmotherflippingBAR these bastards!

Serious question, has anyone ever done an Action Comics #1 homage but it’s someone hurling a giant dildo at a giant ass?

While Kilmar Abrego Garcia is notable for being absolutely none of the things MAGA claimed they'd be targeting - dangerous, here illegally, a criminal, etc - I note that there are TENS OF THOUSANDS of others who were also rendered out of the country just as illegally. Their freedom matters to me.

the pole or the hole, classic Sophie’s choice.

Reading this post on Truth Social is almost certainly how Don Jr found out.

the DNC has a mandate from the public to change or die, and they keep voting for die.

I can't believe it's already been 16 months since I posted this. A lot has happened in that time, notably season 3 of Squid Game.

For each comma in this statement, imagine he's looking at a card somebody just handed him.

What the fuuuuck? So Nick Shirley is somehow now an org that gets put into the MSN normie news feed as if he's a real news source? This is actually worse than if they started including StormFront articles, because those Nazis have beliefs beyond just being lying scammers (crossover though there be.)

A great summary of today’s revelations in the dismissal of the “Broadview 6” defendants (including Kat Abughazaleh.) tl;dr The government’s conduct was so egregious that there should be disbarments throughout the DOJ resulting. The career and financial ruin of Trump stooges is deserved ASAP.

When I was 5, my mom was seduced into leaving my dad, who I adored, by a hot-headed prick who promised her a life of comfort. When I was able to articulate the question “Why did you leave daddy?” she answered “I did it for you, honey.”

Thanks to science, we may hopefully find out if it’s possible to simply *simulate* electrodes to the balls.

Standing on the National Mall with hands outstretched and a beatific smile, swaying as we mainline Christ: God’s perfect lambs, juicy and delicious

He says, "He's a person I've known for a long time." About his son. Like, mid-sentence he actually forgot who he was talking about, so he tried to bullshit his way through, after complaining about the "frake news."

If a problem you send somewhere else stopped existing, this would be a great strategy.

Replace "move to the CENTER" - a nebulous and imaginary concept - with "move to the RIGHT" and you would see answers that are dramatically less goddamned useless.

I advocate The Luigi Solution.

Dispatch from the future: Wow, they're saying it was the lowest-attended World Cup by a super lot! That's crazy, can anyone explain this?

User got blocked for this post. 🥺

About fucking time ANY elected demanded impeachment for one of this punk’s crimes.

Found a guy

Gov Jared Polis told a Colorado Sun event that his decision to give clemency to Tina Peters "will be remembered fondly." He was later interrupted by protesters carrying an enormous banner reading EAT SHIT POLIS coloradosun.com/2026/05/19/j...

“Prosecutors were split in whether a crime was actually committed here” IS IT A CRIME TO BE IN LOVE NOW?

Government by piss baby.

This suit better get an unprecedented number of amicus curiae briefs.

There has never been clearer proof that you can be stupid as hell and still become obscenely wealthy than there is right now.

Kyle Starks speaks the truth! It really does have those books. But also, it’s a ludicrously good value - 49 TPs for as little as $18!!! Half of them are even good! Buy this bundle now, god damn you!

Pequod’s Pizza, thin crust pepperoni, circa 1995. Pequod’s is still a Chicago institution, but at their peak, this pizza has the best pepperoni I’ve ever had on top of every inch of their pie. Tragically, the quality and quantity of the pepperoni is not what it was.

There’s a lot about my country’s people that I just can’t explain, simply because I think much differently than most people. Some complacency here, I think, is that most who have never gone hungry have still now never done so, and cannot imagine being caused to do so. Ask again when it HAPPENS.

Inspired by @presentcorrect.bsky.social, here are the smattering of distinctive binder clips I collected during my mere decade of office supply acquisition, plus a big copper paper clip. Why not?

They're not even bothering to *lie* that this money won't be going to cop-killers, cuz it's expressly for use in financing yet more Trump-loyal thugs to attack our own government and citizens exactly like you and me. They've declared war on us. We're not allowed to even SAY we should fight back.

Congratulations again to @sanders.senate.gov on standing by your impeccable endorsement for Maine Senator. I’m certain that this is the last ever negative revelation about this mutt. I still endorse Platner over Susan Collins, since those are the only choices.

Dude is too washed to bother hiding his baldness anymore.

was i bullied in middle school? lets see: - wore a bathrobe to school every day - had the word “homo” instead of a mouth - parents were both charles manson (long story)

The man who bankrupted a casino has now also managed to produce the first football world cup nobody wants to attend, there has never been anyone else who ever possessed this level of ability at failing

This Bullshit is getting contested.

Assassihunk? The decimating angel? America's TV boyfriend? No, it's "Ambassador" for his habit of being cool and comforting to new arrivals in the joint. What a mensch! Here's the story, just in case you're pooping. www.themirror.com/news/us-news...

I put qualifiers back in my handle so that my ironic intent is easier to grasp. Because I care. I'm not being ironic about that, I do! Oh wow this is going pretty badly.

I hated disney plus’s new special, which had lots of fight choreography in service of a morally repugnant plot. Jon Bernthal co-wrote it, loses respect points.

When Trump "settled' with Mike Flynn for $1.2 mil, I bet Roger Stone asked where's his, but Trump's Sec of Graft told Stone to file a lawsuit if he wanted the free taxpayer money. Stone was all like "But that's haaard!" so Trump was forced to make this catch-all slush fund. Then they gay kissed!

"Laws on the books" = stuff Trump posted on Truth Social. Same thing pretty much.

Hey, remember that time last Tuesday when Don Trump's combover blew away?

For a while I had been trying to write a song called Helicopter Club where the club’s third rule was you had to do a helicopter with your dick. I just couldn’t make the scansion work though, so I ended up making the song about something less meaningful. m.soundcloud.com/johnpontoon/...

I hated disney plus’s new special, which had lots of fight choreography in service of a morally repugnant plot. Jon Bernthal co-wrote it, loses respect points.

The TV special “The Punisher: One Last Kill“ is a MAGA fascist wet dream. Here’s the plot: Frank Castle lives in the fictional NYC in Trump’s head where madmen will shoot you if you dare to try to shop for bread. Frank is sad because he killed all of his personal Bad Guys. Then their surviving 1/4

The Biblically-accurate plank is what they forced the unicorns to slide off of.