No one watches Eurovision at my work so I have no small talk this week

Okay I’m listening to all the 2026 Eurovision songs for the second time and there are some strong contenders but Switzerland is my favorite atm I love it so much

Friend once said anyone who says T. rex is their favorite dinosaur is basic and I can’t stop making fun of him for calling my toddler basic

Tween Lynda did not like this movie teen Lynda was OBSESSED.

Wait, it’s Eurovision week? Nooo, I’m legit too busy to watch 😭😭😭

Suddenly remembering Hot Jasper from Emma Stone’s Cruella

Introducing the kids to one hundred and one dalmatians in my ongoing effort to get them to want a dog

Gosh I wish I watched the mariners game today that’s so many runs

I learned which teacher in the pre school room my son doesn’t like when I read the names on the teacher appreciation cards this morning. “Not Teacher X!” He shouted. So sorry, bud, she puts up with you being a gremlin so she’s getting a card.

So we’re watching the frozen play Disney + was promoting and folks it is bad

I’ve started playing Wordle again every morning, but with my 7 yo, and I have to tell her what every word means and how you sound it out

There’s a promotion to get MLB hats in PoGo at baseball games and really all my hobbies are colliding.

Back on my bs (crochet and baseball)

Hate having to figure out what to wear in new settings. Like, it’s May 3 and it’ll be 80 degrees today and I’m going to a baseball game. Do I even have shorts? If I wear my cute jeans will it be sweltering?

Making progress on my summer dress project.

I love when people jump and catch even if it’s against my team it’s just so cool

My toddler nonchalantly let himself out of his crib for the first time, then casually brought two dinosaurs and a giant snake downstairs to show them off, and I’m letting him stay up as long as he cuddles and watches the baseball with me.

Randy Johnson flash backs!!! This is a fun weekend.

Sport content bluesky remain the best bluesky honestly all of yall would be happier if you posted more sports

I don’t follow basketball at all but this is cool love sports

Okay all toddlers are in bed and are no longer here to turn off the Mariners game

I’m getting too many emails but also I’m struggling on what to unsubscribe from turns out I have curated too many notices re: things I’d actually pay money for

Girl Scouts won’t stop making up apps they want me to download. It’s like, ma’am, I want zero apps.

Oscar Isaac was in the Criterion Closet and he’s the first guy who I think properly understood that he gets all the movies for free and just overloaded the bag

“Linda” - but somehow also an informational interview request?

the Sacramento zoo has 6 BABY CAPYBARAS

My four year old is asking for a birthday cake where dinosaurs play baseball and honestly I can pull that off

Me trying to get my kid to tell me about take your kid to day: “Can you tell me about your time at dada’s work?” (Spoiler, I made him send me photos of approx 5 million activities) “It was so fun. I even got to go to Red Robin!” (The only thing she wants to talk about)

Take your kid to work day is the best there are adorable kids everywhere. I am so jealous because I’m busy and my husband is taking the kid to work tomorrow and is gonna get to do all the fun stuff!

This is an incredible tweet.

I bought a tent from Cabela’s and their follow up marketing email is intense I am not their demographic. At best I can be a nice REI girl but I am not gonna hunt elk with a high intensity bow and arrow.

It's their boat, they signed a lease and everything!

It’s so funny when the vet writes a prescription for my cat using my last name. Like, what, you thought we were related? Do we look alike? This is just a little guy who lives in my house and eats my food! I call him Mr Banana but that’s not his real name or anything!

Did not realize how much of parenthood would involve bullying my kids to wear clothes

This Is Just To Say I have turned off the AI features that were in the update and which you were probably hoping to monetize Fuck you they were stupid so unnecessary and so annoying

Beautiful day for a crochet event at the Mariners

My 3 yo keeps saying “A is for crocodile!” And he won’t accept alligator is right there.

“I enjoy watching the TV show The Pitt” - this is what all you The Pitt fans sound like 🙄

I hope Dr. Robby adopts the baby

My kids are so cuddly lately it’s super sweet

It’s Tax Day! It’s been determined that many of you owe back taxes as you have not shared enough photos of your pets. Please submit payment of one (1) photo PER PET to this thread.

this is what teenagers in movies looked like during the iraq war

“Linda”

It’s profoundly ignorant to suggest that the Pope should be fighting crime on behalf of the Catholic Church. Anyone who was remotely familiar with Roman Catholicism would know that that’s what Daredevil is for