Too horny to think 😵‍💫

Doubled up boypussy last night healed me.

One time I made the Shangela/Mimi Imfurst fight out of LEGO.

Happy ‘Blast “Cut to the Feeling” with the Windows Down’ Weather, Seattle!

If you stay fool, you don’t have to April Fool.

The moon did a cool thing

Me? Ow.

post a non-religious picture you think of as holy

Too horny to think this morning.

I miss the time before Tesla‘s.

When will my husband* return from war** * season 4 of The Gilded Age ** be released

This is where culture peaked:

Meg Ryan Phillippe

Pit tax

I want garlic bread.

It’s maddening to me that these words rhyme.

Craving a cutie drinking my piss.

Would you look at the time?! 🕰️ It’s time to play with my cock.

Pam Bondi says if we persecute everyone in the Epstein files, the whole system would collapse. Me:

Being in a holding pattern for one of the most important moments in American history is such an utterly bizarre thing to be living through.

i wanna be naked in a hot tub

Me, to Sabrina Carpenter guest starring on The Muppet Show:

How do I tell my algorithm of ads that I filed my taxes a week ago?

Also? Let’s say the quiet part out fucking loud. It was never homosexuals. It was never drag queens. It was never trans folx. Every one of their accusations is an admission.

The Moira’s Rose’s Memorial Garden 4856

Filed my taxes.

Wood Morning 😵‍💫

It’s my birthday and all I want is for THAT thing to happen…

Pre-birthday threesome and piss play.

faggots against fascism.

If you insist…

You guys, I love playing with my cock.

Meanwhile, at “the Board of Peace”

Oops I came.

damn my kink really is just when you’re nice

That Officer?

Not my house, but I know my way around

How long do I have to wish people a happy new year in work emails so I don’t come across as rude?

What the fuck is wassailing?

I’m sick. Send butt pics?

What are the most and least twerkable Christmas songs? I say: Most - “Carol of the Bells” Least - “Silent Night”

This year, I am doing an advanced version of The Little Drummer Boy Challenge: If I hear Christmas music, I lose.

me too, Marge. me too.

Take me back…

I finally figured out my review of the changes they made in Wicked: For Good…

this is a work of art

🌽

How is a recycling bin ALWAYS full?!