I’m afraid to say I’ve finally taken my blog down. The UK safety act is too much of a barrier and I don’t want to either sanitise the blog or put age checks in. I’m going to download all the writing and may yet turn it into a book. A memoir of my exploration of kink and the growth that came from it.

Thought for the day. It’s a male paedophile scandal, yet the only person in prison is a woman. It’s an American paedophile scandal, yet the only people shamed are Brits. Just how wide and deep must the cover-up be over there?

Every now and then one of Ferns’ posts from the past hits a spot. Like this….. I like bruises too. Bruises I’ve been given. Bruises I’ve caused. Mmmm

Five jobs I’ve had: 1) Bar man (all over the shop) 2) Cider delivery (Brum) 3) Supermarket worker (Oslo) 4) Ski instructor (Scotland) 5) Intercepting other people’s radars 🤐

If I still have any followers who voted for Brexit, feel free to unfollow me and crawl into your own little hole. And take your 90 minute non-EU customs line with you. I know this is less tolerant than my normal fare but that’s just how I feel at this point in time.

Airport breakfast. Going skiing ⛷️ for first time in 6 years. We’ll have to see how my repaired heart gets on living at 2,000m. Travelling with one son to stay in the hotel Where the other is head chef!! Nice.

Travel, Beach, Job. Travel is definitely in the plan. May have to include beach travel in that. But “Job” That’s a funny one. I told my therapist the other day that I’d realised my life revolved around avoiding boredom. That’s too low a bar now I’m healthy again. I need to do something.

Happy Christmas to any and all who remember me here. Starting the day alone for the first time but made a proper breakfast. Family Christmas dinner at my brother’s later. 3 dogs and a baby so should be fun. Let’s meet in the New Year.

Just got cold called by someone who had my name and number and wanted to talk about my Painaspleasure. com domain. WTAF!

Posted without comment.

More amazing guest blogs from dudes on #InternationalMensDay... this piece from @bibulous1.bsky.social#InternationalMensDayabout exploring kink in his fifties

So. While I waited for an adult to talk me out of it, I turned 10 years of blogging into a 50 minute Edinburgh Fringe show about a boarding school survivor who went exploring the kinky underworld and ended up finding himself. Now what???

"She had been captured by the secret police while checking a dead drop for messages from her spy." This time last year, a deliciously creative #kinky scene between @euclideanpoint.bsky.social and @bibulous1.bsky.social 😍 www.girlonthenet.com/blog/kinky-i...

NEW: I’ve been lucky enough to play the Dom to some wonderful submissives. @missksting.bsky.social let me Dom a Domme! painaspleasure.com/2025/09/13/d...

Malta, I am in you.

NEW: I’ve been lucky enough to play the Dom to some wonderful submissives. @missksting.bsky.social let me Dom a Domme! painaspleasure.com/2025/09/13/d...

How it started. How it’s going. This is me - a month or so after my heart op and now. Cardiac rehab is working. 💪🏻🏃‍♂️

I just looked up nipple clips on Amazon (left mine in a dungeon a few weeks ago). Reader, I have questions. * Why for men/for women? I thought nipples were nipples. * Beginner? Fair enough I guess. * Adult? Of course adult! Eww * Nipple clippers! WTAF? Dear God, Nooooo!!!

I just looked up nipple clips on Amazon (left mine in a dungeon a few weeks ago). Reader, I have questions. * Why for men/for women? I thought nipples were nipples. * Beginner? Fair enough I guess. * Adult? Of course adult! Eww * Nipple clippers! WTAF? Dear God, Nooooo!!!

Personal trainer (over video): I’m glad you got back from your lunch in time. Me: I managed to get an Uber Her: So you’ve just eaten! Feeling OK to exercise? Me: Sure. No problems! Her: What did you eat? Me: Errr. Lunch was more of a time for our meeting rather than what we were doing.

I am now “my alarm went off and I couldn’t think why I’d set it till 2 hours later so wasted my cinema ticket” years old. Not a welcome development.

Here’s a hot bit of audio for your Saturday morning.

Conversation overheard as I walked past 3 men sat having a beer outside my local: “When I got nicked for doing all those Bang & Olufsens….” Winchester may not be all it seems.

I was belted yesterday. For me the belt is a fast track, do-not-pass-GO, trip to a dreamy trance-like subspace. The pain of the impact is in perfect balance with the intimate connection with the Mistress. I didn’t want it to stop, and when it did I just wanted to stay still on the bench. Breathing

Apparently, if you’re trying to lose weight, as I am, Non Scale Victories is a thing. Are a thing. Cos pleural innit? To take a non-hypothetical example, if someone is spanking you and says “your trainer is doing a good job, you have a nice muscly bum,” that is a NSV! Who knew????

OK why did nobody tell me about this Nata shop in Camden high street?

Me??? I’m just trying to decide what to wear to a beating. As you do. Old post on this subject here. painaspleasure.com/2017/08/16/m...

Had a session with my occasional therapist today, hoping she would be the adult I’ve been looking for to talk me out of doing this show. Her: “Oh my God. That’s amazing. You must do it. All that validation for who you are and the journey you’ve been on. Fantastic!” 🙄 Hmmmm

Whenever I find myself in front of King’s Cross I give this colourful hotel a nod. A significant part of my blog took place in its rooms. I played out all sorts of kinky scenes here. Explored new things and new people, and gradually became comfortable with who I was. Sighs.

Thinking about turning the story that runs through my blog into a show for the Edinburgh fringe. I’ve written an outline and 2/3 sections. I think it’s quite good. I want to learn a section to perform it in front of others. Just to see if the idea has legs. I can’t do it. So maybe it’s a daft idea 😞

Something hot for you. I’m having a shoulder/back massage while I’m playing poker (so far so normal) Masseuse I don’t know. Near the end of my time she digs her fingernails into my back. I lean into it a bit so she does it again. How did she know???

Oof. This was special. Quite intense. It left me feeling renewed but also physically strong though emotionally fragile. I’m sensitive to everything; the chill in the morning air, the taste of the raspberries on my yoghurt, Jacinda Ardern’s emotion as she describes a family tragedy in my ears.

I am a bundle of nervous energy. On Hampstead Heath I feel everyone must sense it. I feel so alive, adrenaline humming. I think through what’s to come: The dungeon. The Mistress. The sensations. The emotional release of it all. God, I need this. @hellomisshunter.bsky.social

Thought for the day: it seems that these days we only get this kind of retail in the very wealthiest places (this is Hampstead) or in poor areas with ethnic minority communities who want to shop this way. I think that’s a shame.

I’m still doing the cardiac rehab fitness programme. I’ve recovered from the op and can do everything I could do before the heart problems started. Now it’s about winding the clock back further just for the joy of being fit. Also I want to go skiing in January.

Gulp. It’s today.

Have a session on Tuesday. One where I will both submit and be submitted to. I will both inflict pain and have it inflicted on me I expect it all to be rather intense. Bit nervous actually. About both aspects of it.

Love everything about this (yes, I enjoy impact play)

I was flogged yesterday with a heavy flogger. She kept checking in because I was new to her and it wasn’t her flogger. But by the end it felt like being hit with a cricket bat, making me thump into the cross. Her hug pulled me out of a dreamy subspace. Mmmm

So I’m in a London basement with five other men watching the cricket. As you do. The only difference is that every so often two of us get taken into the other room for a beating. It’s kinda weird and kinda normal at the same time

With the assisted dying bill in parliament today, I thought I’d repost a link to this. There’s a bit of distance now from my parents’ very different deaths, but this post still represents how I feel about the subject being voted on today. painaspleasure.com/2023/12/20/g...

NEW. I recently visit Lisbon and came back with 10 seconds of video and a memory…. painaspleasure.com/2025/06/17/f...

NEW. I recently visit Lisbon and came back with 10 seconds of video and a memory…. painaspleasure.com/2025/06/17/f...

When I’m 80 I’m gonna be this guy but with a rental Maserati.

Enjoying this wall art in the posh Mayfair flat where I’m playing poker.

I’ve just got back from Portugal. Have some Fado. I’ve been listening to it for years but now I’ve seen it live. Amazing. I mean really stunning.

I’ve just got back from Portugal. Have some Fado. I’ve been listening to it for years but now I’ve seen it live. Amazing. I mean really stunning.

Well that didn’t take long.

Lisbon, I am in you!

Prison? Young offenders institution? No It’s a primary school. When did we start having to do this to a primary school? Sad