Weird behavior alert! I had done laundry before friends arrived at my house (including the hand towel in the bathroom.) I forgot to replace the towel and my husband's friend washed his hands then tried to discreetly wipe his hands on a clean blanket instead of asking for a hand towel

Wishing Curtis Sliwa all the pussy his heart desires

more like government slutdown the way chuck schumer is serving 🥵

Has this boy for 8 years now

My spouse has some really cool job perks #tigers #detroit #detroittigers

Got the mayor of Hazel Park in this tiki karaoke bar rn

Anyone who wants to play animal crossing, let me know 💖

Jubilee pitch: “Julius Caesar vs 20 Roman Senators”

Made a new desktop background

If you’re under 30, you weren’t even born the last time Andrew Cuomo lived here. This is your city. Vote like it.

When a drug-sniffing dog retires they should let the dog finally take drugs

Husband and I at the carnival 🥰

Trying to keep my velcro dog away for 2 seconds

I think Ncuti Gatwa is my favorite doctor

I love at the end of a match (fighting/wrestling) when they go to declare the winner and they all hold hands

He likes being wrapped up

Oops 😬

If you listen to Kanye, we're not friends anymore Tweets from the past 19 hours TW: sexual assault, fatphobia, antisemitism, homophobia/f slur, abelism/r slur, use of the term bitches Part 1/4

Women want me. Fish fear me. Fish want me. Women fear me. Women are fish, fish are fish. Phylogenetically, all vertebrates are fish.

Had to explain to my husband that an assorted cheesecake platter is a staple dessert for holidays (he's never heard of nor seen one)

there was an insurrection in roku city

Dog

Bo is short for bobert

I sent this to my friends because they're sick

Quote this with a title screen that is iconic to you

"you have dysautonomia"

Find the dog

Dog laying on other dog

I’ve said it many times before and I’ll say it many times again; being dyslexic is a wild ride of reading words that aren’t there and then they magically change.

Waiting for Halloween next year where people dress as a combined Luigi

Buoy electrolyte drops offer a 35% discount for people with chronic illnesses but the only way to buy anything with the discount is by signing up for a 1 or 3 month subscription. You're not able to customize your order to your needs or buy individual bottles with the discount. It blows.

My spouse is at his company work party and they hired Pitbull???

After 6 years of Mac as my top artist, we have a new sheriff in town

Mac Miller (1yr) and Clark Kent (7yr) ❤️

Hasan Piker rightly pushes back on the idea that the Democrats simply need their own Joe Rogan, telling CNN "It's 100% a policy thing," calling for "real left-wing economic populist messaging instead of purposely avoiding that stuff because they're terrified of upsetting their corporate donors."

not to be too harsh but what’s the use of transgender representation in congress if they will immediately give in to fascist demands. genuinely what’s the purpose to this at all here

My finest achievement