I'm watching Invasion of the Body Snatchers again, just for the very last shot of the movie. Donald Sutherland had it going on.

Yer ma's got dugs like Boris Karloff's knees

A norse

Do you reckon that Queen Victoria ever sucked anyone off?

Yurra Prick

The answer is: Aliens

Guess what film I'm watching from the description: It's been so long since I saw it I'd forgotten Paul Reiser was in it.

Deacon's Beacon, twinned with Theakston's Cheekstons

The King owns every duck who knows how to fuck in the UK

Gregory Muntjac-Camel (Belgium)

Tugnuts Chugnuts KC

Might change my name by deed poll to Yankden Wankden

I've been.dobbing you all in to the FBI for various misdeeds

Danny Welbs for England

ANGEBALL!

You've got to want to suck seed

Keir Starmer is worried about setting a precedent that will get all far right scumbags banned from football matches in England. Which would have a terrible impact on crowds at Chelsea.

My favourite solo Beatles song is Run of the Mill by George Harrison. So that's another little thing you've learned about me.

Two fascists walk into a bar. One fascist says, can you stop doing a genocide? It is getting bad optics. The other fascist says, good idea, I'll nominate you for the Nobel Peace Prize.

Egg

Canadian privateer Al Pease was born #OnThisDay in 1921. Pic: his Eagle T1G, at Mosport in ’69, looks cool, no? Er, yes, but actually Pease established an unenviable record that day: he remains the only driver in #F1 history to be black-flagged for driving too slowly. #AnorakFact

NOMINATE EARLY AND NOMINATE OFTEN

Vote for @samwhyte.bsky.social

Horse butts

Come on you mackerel bastards

Forest Green's kit was designed by Lilo Lil

Oh Sussex, Sussex by the Sea! Good old Sussex by the Sea! You may tell them all we stand or fall, For Sussex by the Sea!

Oh, here he is, alright Windsor Davies?

NICE SHOES, SAVAGE, YA FANNY

Worthing FC's ground is a 25 minute stroll from my house. So why am I shouting mocking jibes at Robbie Savage from the sofa as though he can hear me?

Worthing draw Smokin' Jack Wilshere's Luton Town away. If they beat Forest Green. Which they will, because cannibalism is rife in BN13 and they're not getting out of this one so easily

We're recording a readers questions special podcast tonight lieblings, so we're going to need your questions to make this happen! Drop them in the replies and we'll get on them tonight :-)

Now is the time for marching, Now let your hearts be gay, Hark to the merry bugles Sounding along our way. So let your voices ring, my boys, And take the time from me, And I’ll sing you a song as we march along, Of Sussex by the Sea!

I'd love Worthing to build themselves up to a point where I had to make a difficult decision about whether I supported them or Albion. It wouldn't be difficult. Ive put up with so much shit from Brighton over the decades that I'm doomed to follow them forever. But Sussex pride should not be denied.

My wife just left for the ground in her replica shirt, she's become a Worthing FC Ultra

People watching Worthing v Forest Green in the FA Cup tonight, please remember Worthing are the Mackerelmen and their mascot is Mackey the Mackerel

Working on a song about Forest Green Rovers. Trying to make Forest Green Rovers rhyme with shit

In ASDA you can get two 14-inch pizzas, a side, and a litre of coke for a tenner. This isn't clever or witty or anything, but I think everyone should be told.

“What’s the charge? Eating a seal?”

Bananas are so popular as to be ubiquitous and universal. I detest them, both their taste and texture are hellish. Sausage Party is a film I got 10 minutes into before angrily giving up. Few films have angerbored me into submission. Walking In Memphis by Marc Cohn is the worst song ever written.

The new supposedly Instagram friendly brunch place by here is not getting great reviews, hard to understand given the photos I'm seeing of their food

Paul Simon is 84. Seen here with Art Garfunkel.

A night of fabulously strange dreams seems to have purged my system somewhat, I'm able to think clearly for the first time in a week.

Encephalopathy is just shit, it's shit shit shit.

As always a reminder that prints and stickers do exist and I am willing to post them to you for a price, also available in my wife's shop in canton, Cardiff, the UK's fourth coolest place to live in, not my words, the words of Time Out magazine

Going through old stuff to try and motivate myself to make new stuff

30 days of FUCK. I am crocheting a FUCK a day for 30 days and make a Throw of FUCKS. #Fuck #Crochet #TwinMade #30daysofFuck #Sweary #Swearing

Morning loves, words and pictures from Slough Town vs Enfield Town yesterday, where sitting in a cemetary offered some perspective on losing a football match. unexpecteddelirium.substack.com/p/the-weeken...

I cannot stress this strongly enough: Support your local theatre, café, bookstore, bakery, and library. We breathe life into these places when we support them. They need us, and more importantly, we need them.