Had a couple of students wearing Notre Dame gear during a final exam today. I expect they think if they get an A on the final, it should nullify any Ds or Fs from the beginning of the semester.

Holy mackerel what an album.

Why does anyone on this earth care who the 12th best college football team in the USA is? Get a life, losers. #BringBacktheBCS

Woof, SZ. #Crew96

This take could age like raw milk, but here goes. I'd much rather the #Crew96 hire Damet than Curtin.

Can the most openly racist politician in the western world survive allegations of racism? What?

FOX having the American FIFA TV rights has always stunk to high heaven and their coverage has been predictably awful the entire time. But snagging Rebecca Lowe, easily the best studio host in all of American sports broadcasting, for the World Cup gives me a modicum of hope.

My kids instantly complain every time I turn on a podcast in the car. But my 7yo listened to @tonyreast.bsky.social’s Locked On episode today and said ‘I actually like this one’. Take note pod industry - the children yearn for Pacers content.

This western conference final between MLS.com’s preseason predicted bottom two of Vancouver and San Diego is a real shot in the arm to the concept of ‘championship windows’ in this totally random league.

I think Milos Kerkez might be the worst professional soccer player in the world.

People like to complain about paying for streaming services. But on the consumer side, the Substackification of written content is so much worse. The product(s) you receive might scratch your niche interests, but its quality is lower than what used to exist largely because of audience capture.

ScottsMiracle-Gro Field is such a comically embarrassing name for a stadium that I love it. #Crew96

A few things can all be true at once. 1. Nancy is the best coach in #Crew96 history holy jeezus you’re dim if you disagree. 2. Celtic is a *much* better job than anything in MLS. Nancy would be certifiable to not take it. 3. It sucks, but no one knows what will happen next season.

I regret to inform you that the morally correct position is to root for Miami against the sportwashing petroclub that Don Garber allows to play on a U10 sized dirt field.

lol Evander

Nick Hagglund would fit right in as a #Crew96 CB (derogatory). #VamosMiami

Today we all bleed pink.

Why hasn't the Ohio Democratic Party recruited Pam's ex-boyfriend @morganhughes.bsky.social to run for governor? He's a well known lib and has a deep reservoir of content where he repeats various slurs on a podcast he makes with a bunch of other white guys. @acesradio.bsky.social #Crew96

Automatic yellow card for taking your shirt off is easily the dumbest rule in sports.

I will clutch no pearls over the MLS schedule shift. Aligning windows should increase the quality of the on field product and the business end of the season will not be competing with football. I will miss being able to go to games during the summer though. #Crew96

The reactions to this are pretty dumb honestly. Who cares about the price for the best tickets to the final?? The actual injustice is having to pay hundreds and hundreds of dollars to gain access to upper decks during the group stage.

Extremely appropriate ending to the season - our CBs being absolute passengers in the most crucial moment of the game. #Crew96

Big question for the second half: how many times can Evander hockey check our guys before he gets called for a foul? #Crew96

That Indiana-Penn State game woulda been pretty cool had there been *any* playoff jeopardy riding on the result. Ah well, nevertheless. #BringBackTheBCS

Ok so this picture rules. #Crew96 #TIFOSWEAT

I wonder, if I went on strike from getting a haircut until @footballweekly.bsky.social goes 5 consecutive episodes without complaining about the handball law, would I end up in the barber's chair before or after that Man United fan? @maxrushden.bsky.social

Voter #49 in my precinct at 8:21 am.

#Crew96 #HellIsReal #TheyKilledHarambe

I’ll admit the vibes are currently good. But the Atlanta 5-4 game is still in my head. #Crew96 #AllezColumbus

This is all I can think about every time I see Hugo Picard. #Crew96

Reminder to all those in the #Crew96 universe tonight.

Dodgers fans don’t deserve good things. But what a game.

The thing that is finally going to do me in is people referencing "championship windows" in MLS. They don't exist. It's the most random league in the universe. Please read all of the pre-season commentary on Philadelphia and San Diego, the #1 seed in each conference.

It’s inevitable someone will say it. So it needs to be established that any #Crew96 fan who is so riddled with Messi Derangement Syndrome that they say they’re gonna root for FCC in the second round belongs underneath the 9th circle of Hell. With Anthony Precourt. For eternity.

I will be trapped in a meeting during the first half of #HellIsReal tonight. This should be illegal. #Crew96

My 5 and 7yo went to sit in the car while it warmed up this morning. Little did I know that my phone was close enough that the Bluetooth connected and they were listening, unsupervised, to @acesradio.bsky.social. See you all in 4-6 years after I serve prison time for child endangerment. #Crew96

We legitimately had a perfect thing going and decided to throw it all away.

yikes orlando

I mean this as earnestly as possible. What a player. What a man. He is one of one. #Crew96

Bro are the #Crew96 good? That was actually pretty fun.

One last banger, Darlington. That would be very good and cool. #Crew96

Cape Verde! 🇨🇻🇨🇻🦈🦈

Can’t co-sign this enough. The ability to not pay attention to your kids at the playground has been one of the most freeing parenting experiences. It’s very obviously good for both kid and parent.

It’s so embarassing when you accidentally type your password into the username field and see your password naked.

One of the best to ever hack it in this league. Deserves every flower that comes his way over the next few weeks. Oh captain, my captain. #Crew96

I mean, it’s the first time since Leagues Cup the squad didn’t look like a festering pile of garbage. Unfortunately, simply not being terrible doesn’t result in wins all that often. #Crew96

The full list of #Crew96 players that *absolutely* need to be active participants on the field next season: Rossi WAA Moreira (gotta be better though) That's it. And I am completely aware of every person I've left out.

Defying belief, these numbers are somehow even faker than the bogus MLS club valuations that get kicked around.