we must go back in time and prevent this Event

cannot fathom how deeply impure someone’s heart would have to be to hold any hatred for The Doobie Brothers

i’m like if frank zappa traded talent for not being a libertarian

this is tonight :)

their are few things funnier than parents hitting it out of the park (yard?) on pitches from their kids

the amount of people on tiktok that think being in the gifted program in grade 3 means they're magic is alarming

loot that drops after defeating me: 1. well-loved pack of marlboro black 100s 2. pocket bible (unloved) 3. at least three plant cuttings that i meant to propagate 4. i would say a guitar pick or something but real bassists use their fingers 5. a single dangly earring

i will buy into any horror movie if you can make a truly uncanny face

i wonder how much supernatural shit goes unmentioned because people know better than to talk about it

run clubs seem like polyamory with less enjoyable cardio

thought about getting peacock to watch the hockey tournament but literally every game airs while i’m at work

it’s beautiful out and you’ve earned it. walk to the gas station and buy yourself a dick pill today.

at least my friends know what to expect of me i guess

chatgpt cannot go to heaven so it should not be used to write a sermon

“ambient music is just background noise” sorry you can’t appreciate subtlety

every band needs to get more ambient now

do i really need another black screenprinted gildan t-shirt

crashing in

hey remember when we traded mikko rantanen for no fucking reason?

i <3 our dogshit powerplay and inevitable first round exit

i /know/ blowing on food that hit the ground just gets more mouth germs on it but i’m far more comfortable with my own mouth germs than floor germs

“fanduel live odds update” literally kill yourself

two Avs on the canadian national team? i might care about the olympics this year

remembered we’re playing in kansas which means it’s significantly more frowned upon to stand outside smoking weed after load out. 🍅🍅🍅

Hi everyone, with no eviction moratorium happening in Minnesota, mutual aid organizations like @supplydepotmpls.bsky.social could always use more donations (I mean they always could be, but the need is getting ever bigger): linktr.ee/sanctuarysup...

surely if you’ve got enough money for a high production music video someone on the team is creative enough to think of something better than “stare at the camera and look cool”

the new Searows album is exactly like what a late january album should sound like, laying on a cold couch in the dark wondering when it will ever be warm again

There is No Mathematics to Love and Loss by Anberlin

the rest of my week got upended by an email at 8 am, there will be consequences but i haven’t discovered what they are yet

don’t pay attention to nerds debating rn. you don’t know what those words mean, I don’t know what those words mean. we’re all probably all wrong. donate to mutual aid!! thats enough, you can go straight to bed after.

it’s so funny that rice says to fluff with a fork. rice is a spoon food, idiot

Top Gun

apologies to Willoughby Tucker but Ilya Rozanov is a much better embodiment of “pretty boy, natural bloodstained blonde”

realizing i’ve been out of something for weeks because i clicked the X instead of the check on my eternal grocery list and it simply feel to the wayside

leaving <10 seconds on a communal microwave is a sin worthy of the seventh level of hell

heaven forbid the timing is off gaslightdiver.bandcamp.com/track/if-you...

this is this weekend :)

yeah that makes sense, because of the linear progression of time

ten years ago today no one clapped

ICE are slave catchers and y'all want better trained slave catchers? Y'all want slave catchers with better rules? Fuck out of here

if nothing else, i am glad my mom fully understands that i will call out bullshit when see it

learning it was a full moon last night makes me feel so much better about my behavior

It's an odd feature of constitutional law that passwords are protected by the 5th amendment but fingerprints aren't. An actually actionable bit of opsec is to not use fingerprints for authentication on your phone.

sometimes it’s a date, sometimes it’s a new person you can unabashedly send reels to

retracing my footsteps to find the lighter thief

i need to be carrying stickers on me at all times

last night’s fit

i know i should cut myself off when i start fiending for the vape but at the point i’m fiending for the vape i am not exercising good self control

remember when the panama papers came out and we found out every rich person on earth was committing tax fraud and then nothing happened