My mom has completely lost the plot. Read me for filth for drinking a frap because “dessert isn’t breakfast” and then proceed to serve me a slice of frosted lemon cake for breakfast

Just watched one of my dayhab clients think long and hard to come up with the worst insult she could think of. Apparently it’s calling someone “a mean old chickenhead” and I’m not remotely disappointed in this information.

Look yall I’m trying to follow Jesus but my main instincts are to flip tables to rebuke stupid people so I’m not sure I’m sticking the landing here

So squishy

Me: I’m in a really good mood- I should call my mom and say hi! Me later: I am an idiot and my good mood is ruined

“Beware the old men in a job where men die young.”

Why aren’t we talking about how hard the drums go at the end of No One Mourns the Wicked

Today I learned my rat, Bubbles, has been faking a recurrent ear infection because she likes her flavored antibiotics. I am no longer the smartest living thing in my own home

Hello, Police? The ASPCA commercial is emotionally abusing me again

Beau is stoked about his Christmas gift.

Happy Christmas, folks. Be good to each other.

Just gonna leave this here.

My toxic trait is that I would try to pet the animals instead of making freaking GORGEOUS sketches of them.

Good morning blue sky .

Jingle bells Something smells Where is my cat and what has she fucking done now

last christmas i gave you my harp the very next day you gave it away what the hell you expressed interest in learning concert harp

Why so grumpy, Juni-cat?

There’s something about seeing your worst bully leading worship that inspires some very non-Jesus-approved feelings in my crusty lil Grinch heart

Brutal hippo attack caught on camera

I think I’m real tough stuff until I have to tell my sweet client with IDD that we can’t go to the much-anticipated Christmas party tonight (cancelled bc of flu). If anyone needs me I’ll be crying in the supply closet

Beau is refusing to participate in existence today. Fuckin’ genius

this is your seasonally scheduled reminder that Mannheim Steamroller slaps, actually

If today is hard for you for any reason, I’m sorry. You deserve better and I hope you get it soon. Maybe tomorrow, maybe next week, I don’t know. But at some point whatever’s weighing you down is going to feel lighter. Sit it out, you’ll get there. ❤️

This is Juni. She’s pretty cool.

I’ve decided to take the leap and become a full-time mumbling, incoherent wreck

I swear to god I could lose an object while actively using it

My cat just informed me that she will be raising my rent. I don’t know where she thinks I’m gonna get that much catnip and churu

Anyone have a spare void I can scream into?

“Did you scrape your nose?” No Janet I’m wearing this cotton ball and washi tape on my face because it brings out the annoyance in my eyes.

My pen collection has reached catastrophic size, so unfortunately I’m going to have to get rid of some. Just kidding I’m buying more

10% chance of flurries? Sorry, I’m afraid I have to cancel everything

Saw a cyber truck this morning and it ruined my whole day

Our worship leader may love Jesus but apparently he fucking HATES sopranos

My mom just found out that “yes, I went to church and took communion” means I went to Target and had a Starbucks

I’m watching Anna Lapwood on YouTube- the sheer volume and power of a cathedral organ never ceases to amaze me. I want be able to play a whole building too

Dyslexia is fun- I just spent hours confused about why South Korea was instituting marital laws

My iPad will repeatedly correct Jeroboam to “Jerry Bomb” and Rehoboam to “Rehomed” but doesn’t catch the 50 bazillion times I typed “teh” instead of “the” someone please explain