When I saw this the first time I laughed so hard I couldn’t breathe. It still hits me.

We’re in the realm of grammar normally only used by time travelers

There are now 10 toilets in Space International Space Station: 4 Crew Dragon Docked at ISS: 1 Soyuz Docked at ISS: 1 Tiangong Space Station: 2 Shenzhou Docked at TSS: 1 Artemis II on way around Moon: 1 This will be the first time a toilet has left low earth orbit!

WE USED TO BE A COUNTRY

Oh damn there’s been a murder in the Supreme Court

For no reason, I’m reminded of the formal session of the Paris Parlement called a lit de justice. Louis XVI called one in 1787 to try to force through some reforms. Lit means bed. A big bed with fluffy pillows. Guess what the king did during this ostensibly very solemn demonstration of his authority

The pope has explicitly said God literally doesn’t want to talk to you because you fucked up so bad

“The mastermind must be some kind of Star Wars Episode I The Phantom Menace”

Golden retriever runs 15 feet after owner mimes throwing tennis ball

Average union soldier memoir: "at first I was like I signed up for this war, but is it really worth it? Then I saw the reality of chattel slavery and I had to be physically restrained from slaughtering every white southerner I encountered"

protesting in this outfit is a real “heads I win, tails you lose” moment when it comes to the optics

I mean, he’s not wrong

genuinely fascinating that we’ve hit a point where the full monetization of the internet and ai bot takeover has led to a majority of people wanting tech minimalism

another banner day for "if you didn't know sports were real, ESPN headlines would be crazy"

In terms of percentage, my PS5 has outperformed any other investment I’ve made since I bought it. Including my house

The people yearn for high quality animated East Asian fantasy stories. Netflix, renew Jentry Chau you cowards

A cold automaton with an austere, artificial appearance and soulless gaze made an appearance at the White House. Also a robot was there

Sometimes history just needs a little push

I can’t get drunk in 10 minutes of dicking around on my phone, nor does ESPN have entire shows dedicated to the best, quickest ways to get the most drunk

If you negotiate with yourself too much, you’ll go blind

No way in hell this was 5 years ago

I check Facebook like once a month and every time it’s a trip

No, way!

Drinking from this and eating a personal pan pizza I got for reading a bunch of books

THE VOLCANO GOD DEMANDS GOPHERS

This whole family needs to be on a watchlist

Well for one thing Ramadan and Easter don’t overlap

This is the leader of the guys insisting people be fired for being insufficiently mournful that a white supremacist died

Man, I hope so

I think this is a crucial point. It turns out there are in fact things that are *much* worse than hypocrisy.

“Undoubtedly the worst American diplomatic gaffe in post-war US-Japan history.” And Bush puked in the lap of the Japanese prime minister!

just really worth emphasizing how totally unnecessary and pointless and above all avoidable the Hormuz Crisis was

Literally said “he did it again!?” before I realized this is another one

Wait, the tariff ruling is what’s set up Robert’s latest round of boo-hoo people are so mean whining?

This, generalized, will be the thesis for the chapter on this period in the US history books

Happy St. Patrick's Day, New York.

And if your hand is bigger than your face you have AIDS

Happy St. Patrick's Day, or, as the Irish say: King Leopold and apartheid can suck it

Was talking with my wife recently about how we missed the innocent days when one could have actual debate about who was the worst president. Buchanan? Andrew Johnson? Wilson? Reagan? Someone else? And now it’s not, like, even close

One of my more small-c conservative-coded opinions is that we badly need to reintroduce a notion of virtue as a public good and conversely vice as worthy of ruthless public sanction Prideful ignorance is a vice that should result in, I dunno, banishment or something

The only Irish saint I venerate is St Brigid, who turned water into beer and performed miraculous abortions

It’s literally freezing this morning. Tomorrow it’s supposed to be 80 and by the end of the week it’s supposed to be in the mid 90s. Ah, Texas

I asked my preferred candidate for city council her stance on the Falkland Islands dispute and her silence has me reconsidering my vote

The old Texas School Book Depository

republicans are in charge of everything and they are getting everything theyve ever wanted and doing everything theyve ever wanted and the world is on fire and the global world order is collapsing. is there a correlation? who can say

Happy tyrant assassination day!

There's a hauntingly beautiful irony in these morons thinking that carefully crafted American hegemony was actually weak and woke, and they would be the ones who would do Power and Dominance properly, and immediately bringing everything crashing down