i think i imjured my back at the gym :(

when it's boiling hot but the kitty wants to cuddle

lmao

Realizing that the reason I get on so well with my boss is that I am exactly like her husband, like eerily similar in too many ways. I feel like I should challenge him to a duel

not really feeling this mustache besties

do you guys think i am an elegant egotist

i'm telling you bro there's nothing to see in this cup on my knee

God I need to be destroyed by shaved head George Costanza with a stubble

Did you guys know Toby Fox voices a character in We Bare Bears

I gotta be honest. This ruined my life a little

oh god they seriously do this for every word starting with "N" in the game

I never understood those who complain about the 300 character limit here. That should be more than enough people for any post

i hope every guy who posts gym progress pics where they've had more progress in less time than me dies

they call them poached eggs because they were wrongfully stolen from a hen

it's called "Carbonara" because of all the organic compounds it contains

They call it iceberg lettuce because most of the flavor lies below the surface

They call them green onions because they're biodegradable

Crazy how some people have just been entirely consumed by LLMs. People who were posting all sorts of stuff before are now exclusively posting about claude, the entire timeline is claude this or claude that, claude is my buddy, look what claude said, jokes about claude, not a single different topic

let's gooooo

is attack on titan fascist? is it morally bad to watch it?

"book clips are having a moment in the stationery world right now" they are? i genuinely wasn't aware of that

i'm ok with dick pics taken on the toilet if the dick is huge

why have i never loved anyone? is it because i'm a monster?

They're close!

who up content deliverying their network? not blue sky that's for sure

They're close!

A ship -- a magnificent ship -- full of gay men. And me.

Would you guys be mad at me if we were roommates and I walked around the house naked all the time

I'm with you in the dark bro...

we're all going to the great american state fair

all my shirts are hard to take off because my back and shoulders and biceps have grown 🥴

watched some star fox footage and now i want to fuck fox and james mccloud even more. they made them too fuckable

My epiphyllum is flowering for the first time since I got a cutting 8 years ago and I'm so excited, they are going to be so pretty

I have the heart of a whale and the libido of a stone

Yes, thank you, youtube AI summaries. Really cutting edge technology

Does anyone know how to stand like a normal person and not like a freak

my favorite slop food to eat consists of one boiled potato, one tomato, a gallon of mayo, and a metric ton of salt, all mixed together in a bowl until it attains slop consistency. it tastes so good

I love trans people and I think we should make more of them

I thought about it a lot and I think I could see myself having sex with the guy from the gym. I can imagine a scenario that isn't dreadful. I should think about it more until I have considered every possible permutation of events

Had a nice dream where I was walking around town and I was being objectified by men on the street

I'm so stupid I can't even prove or disprove that f:R→R^ω with f_n(t)=t is continuous in the uniform topology

Sex scenes are a crucial part of all types of media. What, ya think a stork just flaps in with the new characters

Shopping list pad that has "shopping list pad" written at the top of the first page and already checked when you buy it from the store

Wait why is everyone talking about Utena lately, I think I completely missed something lol

I'm cursed with beautiful long eyelashes that constantly decide to curl backwards and stab me in the eye

i love this wikipedia article on SeaMonkey that has a picture of the wikipedia article on SeaMonkey viewed from SeaMonkey which ALSO has a picture of the wikipedia article on SeaMonkey viewed from SeaMonkey (which just has a photo of the wikipedia home page (viewed from SeaMonkey))

is it ok if my work wife is my manager or is the power imbalance unethical

It sucks how I'm the only person my age on the planet who still gets acne