Not thrilled to be wet but I'll take it given the rest of the weekend has been like

Me: Is it gauche to bring a +1 to a dinner I'm not attending? Also me: Vyl is gonna be there. He'll figure out that you're puppeteering your friends to arrange for your OTP to be in the same place at the same time. Then he'll giggle about it and clap.

Alright @anthrocon.org! The After Dark Writing Track shenanigans continue at 10p, DLCC 310-311. The time, we're talking about "General Adult Writing" with my alter ego, @tjmindewrites.bsky.social, and @beaujackal.bsky.social! Two dogs and a jackal share how to get naughty things published 1/2..

Coming up at 4p for the @anthrocon.org writing track, "Who Are You?: All About Characters" with @utunu.bsky.social, @tyfoxface.bsky.social, and @beaujackal.bsky.social. Join us in DLCC 310-311 for this look at all the wacky types of people that can pop up in stories!

There's this dynamic of people indignantly saying "well you lost yourself a CUSTOMER" when they can't get a badge and it's like "Good? That's what?? An attendance limit?? IS????"

I should just ask the clarifying question every time. “When you say ‘seafood’ do you mean actual fish or spineless bottom-feeders?”

I’m at it! ‘Bout to do an Anthrocon. Stop by if you’re in town! My writing panels this time should be: Fri 4-7 and 10-11 Sat: 9-11 Sun: 11-12 I’d tell you what they are but the schedule won’t load right now >w<

Desire: a bulb on people's profiles that tells me if it's okay to say "I think you're wrong about something." (Maybe red for "I would prefer not to be corrected"; yellow for "Sure, but be nice about it"; and green for "Tell me I'm an idiot.")

Me: @sildar.bsky.social you said "Goddamnit Beau!" when I was only like a third of the way into that joke. Sildar: Yeah I saw it coming and I already hated it!

Them: "Oh! Y-you really mean- uum, hhhhgngh *bottom noises* Me: Oh yes that's EXACTLY what I mean~ Narrator: He had no idea what they were implying, but he believed earnestly that when you see a weakpoint light up THAT bright you hit it even if you don't know what it does.

I guess if you brat hard enough you do become a villain~ Oh man I wonder if "hero who fights just to lose and get the bad ends" ever runs into "villain who's doing it just to experience horny justice" and they have an and-they-were-both-bottoms deadlock.

Identity crisis? Or identity opportunity~

"Awww my mom said my fit is wack..." Incredible sentence to overhear, please do not tell me the context it would ruin The Magic.

Adding this caption to pictures of your fursona.

Rude way to request a hypnosis session

Misread a sentence as containing the phrase Bisexual Lightning and now I may have a superhero idea.

The results are in! We had a wealth of amazing entries this time, definitely check them out~

Ya love to see a guy gettin' GOT

If you're gonna tell a joke right when someone cums, make sure it's a banger. Really swing for the fences if you're gonna commit to that move.

Always a relief when someone else bleets my bullshit so I don’t have to remember to

Watching everyone crying and loving or raging and hating the TADC finale and me just being like "yeah it was good". Like, yeah I enjoyed the show and I'm glad I got to share it with my friends. But it's striking how unmoved I am by comparison.

"Anything you need to tell me, bro? There's a tooltip that says 'anomaly' pointing at you in my HUD, don't hold out on me bro." "Don't worry about it, that's normal." "It by definition is NOT."

Me in a meeting: That's not true. Most of them are alphanumeric but for the 'powertrain lineup name' field on the HMI you can put emoji in it. Boss: I'm gonna... actually not investigate why you know that. M: I pasted a poop in there and it still passed QC. B: Literally asked you not to tell me that

Really just couldn't beat phpBB forums. Anonymized, categorized, low pressure. And the only people there were the ones invested in being there. Not just a random soup of the entire planet on every platform.

"Oh you have a womb tattoo?" "Yeah, and just so you know it's not like, cursed or magic or whatever it just lets people know I'm a slut." "... That's a kind of magic, I think." "🤔... 🙂"

Prompt: So do you wanna run this sequence in beginner mode? Me: Don't patronize me, Linux. I know what I'm doing. P: ... M: ... P: So- M: YES run it in beginner mode. P: Alright, let's do it!

*researches it for like 90 seconds* Okay so looksmaxxing is just like "Okay dudes the women are hogging all the good body dysmorphia so we gotta step up our game."

Okay so what's the deal with the Lego heist? *list of dozens of 3-hour videoessays* Well I don't wanna know THAT bad damn.

love getting older and continuing to be proven that weirdness isn't what equates to immaturity, instead all of the cool people around me only get weirder AND more grounded. i feel sorry for the folks who allowed normative society to burrow that idea into their brain and let it solidify.

Electric chair: Fun idea, terrible execution

"Broooo you still haven't gotten that thing fixed? Your drone has had a cracked screen for like three years." "Hey it works fine! Plus they don't cover repairs. They'd just swap it with one of the later models and I really don't like how big and clunky the DR-700E series are."

*Tapping commands on a sheepdrone's visor* "Hehe, eweser interface~" Three of my ribs are broken as I am brutally headbutted in the sternum. "Damn, really gettin' lambasted over here."

As I exclaimed it today, I realized that "Really? During PRIDE month?" is just gay "in front of my salad".

Workers reportedly treating the pool with bleach and Ivermectin. #injectingpool

Yeah but he's not "electable". There's not the "political will" to do that. Work from home, UBI, healthcare coverage. There are so many things we've proven that they could just hit the switch.

Gendeer affirming snacc

I dunno how the takeaway was "Simpsons predicts the future" and not "We have descended into a nightmare realm that is beyond parody. Worse even than the cruelest jokes our forebears could possibly have conceived."

I don't really follow Games Announcements so I'm finding out what's coming out next primarily through spikes in e621 keywords.

The nib is by far the most sensitive part of the stylus, so take care when handling it.

I'm medium-rare on it myself, but I've nonetheless gotta give it to funny-number-meme on sheer market penetration. My retirement-age mom said it the other day. She had the tone of voice, she did the hand movements. She even added "six-seven, your mom's eleven!" Unhinged. What reality is this?

Wow, so true. Hey everybody check out how I also think this! <3

Got things to do but it’s too late. I have been captured.

Maybe I'm Lupin? I love scavenging food. I'm confused by social etiquette. I'd rather do a wacky caper than do something properly. I have a treasured bf who's a slightly different canine than me, more femme than me and his nose doesn't work. I rely on him for his charisma and emotional intelligence.

This is 10% luck, 20% skill 15% concentrated power of will 55 burgers, 55 fries 55 tacos, 55 pies

The feeling of seeing the new guy explain something you taught him to someone else. UUUUNG stick that straight in my veins. Not only did he learn, I now don't have to explain that thing again.

Every time I've had the courage to send someone I'm commissioning a stickman they have fallen over themselves with gratitude. I promise you that the person you are drawing stickman for will love him.

Whose idea was it to put “weather is nice so everyone is hosting events and being gay” right after “six month leases are up so everyone is moving at the same time”? I’m so tired >w<

Just used the term "villain(esse)s" in order to foster more gender-inclusive evil. Perhaps I'll find a way to cram NBillains in there next.

Them: Can you make an iced hot chocolate? Me: *dialup noise for 12 seconds* Oh chocolate milk. You can say chocolate milk it's ok. On God I was not trying to be mean I legit jammed up at "iced hot" for awhile there and had to parse it out.