You take 45 minutes to complete a task because you're old and tired, I take 45 minutes kuz im watchin Toxie MF Sinclaire and typing in chat while dog walking your task for you. We are not the same o7

No! Babe please stop packing up your things!!! I promise I'm really really good at playing upright bass, I've just been experimenting eith microtonal music lately. No, I promise I know what the notes are supposed to sound like!!! WAIT NO PLEA-

Shoutsout Taro Sakamoto for giving fat weebs like me a guy to cosplay without having to be the "fat" version of x character. Huge day for conventions everywhere 🗣

If you ever catch me with uncuffed pants please check if I'm wearing a suit. If not that is an impostor and you should run very far away. I will die before I get a pant leg hemmed.

ℑ𝔫 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔊𝔯𝔦𝔪 𝔇𝔞𝔯𝔨𝔫𝔢𝔰𝔰 𝔬𝔣 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔉𝔞𝔯 𝔉𝔲𝔱𝔲𝔯𝔢, 𝔱𝔥𝔢𝔯𝔢 𝔦𝔰 𝔒𝔫𝔩𝔶 𝔐𝔬𝔦

Does an advanced application of heavy chalance take away from my enigmatic nature? Absolutely. Will I still try my heart out at everything I do? Absolutley.

The speakers at this very upscale cafe are so blown out its making piano man sound like fuckin sperm swamp, and frankly I couldn't think of a better ambience for my casual study session.

The best part about chainsaw man getting popular is that its an immediate test of who has media literacy.

And I love you, random customer!

As someone who has been a smoker and a non smoker, I cannot fathom how people could ever think smoking wasn't bad for you. I then have a cigarette after 4 months and understand that people are stupid and minty leaf burn so good.

Wishing the inventor of the Frappuccino a very good choke on a cream charger.

Every time I watch the blood and thunder music video I always get jumpscared by the two sisters of battle making out about a minute in.

Forgive me father for I have sinned. I yelled "YEAH!" When a band asked if I knew the song they were about to play, when I in fact had no clue the song had been written, much less recorded and performed live.

God I love eating food at a place that looks fancy and is expensive. Especially when my "Spanish omlette with chorizo" tastes like textured water and costs 35$ dollars. Nothing like it!

Magic is everywhere for those with eyes to see. That is why I will be selling magic seeing eyeballs for the low low cost of $27.64 starting tomorrow. The surgery to have them installed is performed in house by trained magical clinicians. Please inquire about procedure cost.

Nothin like ripping a few quick ciggies before hitting the gym for cardio day😤(I am any%ing lung cancer)

we all know this classic way

To the guy shadow boxing in the mirror after every set at the gym. I love you. Please never change because you're my hero.

Some people browse marketplace on their bathroom breaks. Me? I browse investment opportunities. (checking the price of an Australium Professional Killstreak Frontier Justice to see if I can get it for 45 dollar instead of 50) I buy low, sell high, baby😎