TreVeyon today is what makes playing Pats RB Roulette in fantasy worth it, because on the off chance you actually guess right it’s like

I was sentenced to a full day of hard labor today and missed the entire game but if that’s what it takes for the rookies to actually remember how to football, I will do my job and take one for the team

Kyle Williams!!

Man, another game this weekend for the Pats that’s just like my freshman year No Boutte

It’s very important that you check your fantasy lineup second thing in the morning on Sundays. First thing in the morning you check and see if you’re playing against Jonathan Taylor

Asked him “are you sure you’re not a Xenomorph, buddy?” He said (generic snoring sounds)

That’s right. The University of Connecticut Football Huskies have achieved what I have dreamed of ever since I moved to SEC country: “please don’t embarrass me in front of my friends”

The first draft of this read “James is simply exalting and rejoicing in the beauty of God’s creation, broh”

You could feed me the exact same joke “Zohran is already cleaning up the city!” when a new subgenre of New York scuzzball cries I’M LEAVING every day for the rest of time and I’ll laugh and clap like a seal every time

Elon has never experienced this and neither have his biggest fans but now they can create these visuals with the help of a computermachine

Lol remember when MAGA’s whole shit was Keep Ur Politics Out Of My Sportz

This is the precise kind of thing that the NFL is really great at just not responding to and eventually getting him to forget about, and I am a little surprised at how many people are acting like it's going to happen

People copping out on plans cause it’s raining is so funny. Oooooh yeah I was going to come out and see all you guys and have a great time but what if my little sockies get wet ☹️

There is such a clear line from hunger to rioting all throughout history that it must be deliberate. They want an excuse for military occupation and if we won’t provide one, they will create one.

bring back maligning racism as the mark of a stupid person. prejudice is the mark of an idiot. if you believe that shit i bet you also don’t wipe your ass

Piss all over the toilet seat and don’t wash their hands ass motherfuckers

Man, another game this weekend for the Pats that’s just like my freshman year No Boutte

Under no circumstances do I “gotta hand it to Chuck Schumer”, but I think he gets that MAGA sees *any* level of compromise with Democrats as unacceptable beta cuck weakness and they think they can rule by the sword. Hey, if they keep walking into the bear trap, why not set it again?

Almost had a stroke listening to some old After The Burial and hearing the lyric in Your Troubles Will Cease and going “oh NO is this where The Contortionist got their name??”

Dog is doing the devil’s work for me (forcing woman to downsize the collection of 537 throw pillows in our house by assassinating them one at a time)

Farewell to one of the GOATs www.404media.co/nancy-pelosi...

Stop saying the cop was assaulted by a sandwich You have to use the passive voice. The officer was impacted by a sweet onion chicken teriyaki of unclear origin

A game show that shows you the first 15 seconds of a commercial with all the raw ingredients getting chopped and mixed and cooked and you have to decide if it’s for a new meal prep delivery kit, or dog food

Lock and load those slingshots with 1/2 price grocery store egg salad boys, we’re going ICE hunting

Rep. Yassamin Ansari has set up a table and this sign outside Speaker Johnson’s office.

It just occurred to me that the real Faustian bargain we made for 20 years of absolute dominance with Tom Brady is spending the rest of our lives perpetually involuntarily aware of everything Tom Brady is doing

I never really gave Big Whiskey And The Groogrux King a fair shot because when it came out I was in my “not Converge? Not interested” phase, and now I am pleased to report I’m enjoying it quite a bit

It just occurred to me that the real Faustian bargain we made for 20 years of absolute dominance with Tom Brady is spending the rest of our lives perpetually involuntarily aware of everything Tom Brady is doing

Today is the first I have ever heard about leftists despising Parks and Rec and if this describes you it is imperative that you discharge a 12-gauge directly into your modem and go outside

I can’t shake the feeling that they’re going to make Bill wait a year. Did I hit my head again?

It wouldn’t be an Athletic Football Show reunion episode if the Coach of the Year convo didn’t start with “I think we have to mention Kyle Shanahan”

Even Boston sports radio in the prime of the 2nd Brady Dynasty didn’t cope with success this hard

Now what we have here is a classic American bourbon, infused with the tantalizing flavors of honey, lemon, and echinacea……….ok it’s Bulleit and I dropped my cough drop

This is worse than the worst thing ever attributed to any “Bernie Bro”. The Democratic leader literally refusing to say WHETHER HE VOTED FOR THE DEMOCRAT.

so the Cowboys essentially traded Micah and Mazi Smith for Quinnen Williams, Kenny Clark and a move up roughly 20 spots into the back of the first round of the '26 draft. they got no extra picks out of it

So, nobody’s offering more than like, a 6th for Breece and a 7th, is what I’m hearing

Think about how many brands and entire companies Twisted Tea has outlasted

I guess one way for the Jets to fix their perennial quarterback debacle is to simply accumulate enough 1st round picks to draft all the 1st round quarterbacks

We still play the Jets twice in the next 6 weeks lmao

Patriots RB room getting the push notification that Quinnen Williams is no longer in the division OR the conference:

Jacoby Brissett should win Comeback Player of the Year. Not cause he was hurt or anything, he was just playing for the 2024 Patriots

If Mamdani wins I will leave New York. I will go live in one of the other 5 houses I have, perhaps the one in South Florida, or the one in Paris, or Napa, or Cabo, but I will definitely leave New York. I will keep my apartment, though, because it's awesome and New York is great. But I will leave.

Next time someone asks you to describe the energy that you bring to the organization, show them this pic of Pop Douglas

Ok I’ve said for years that Trump does not actually know what a tariff is and thinks it is just telling other countries “give me ur money”, but seeing his little acolytes like Greg who may be evil but definitely isn’t dumb use it the same way is amazing

I don’t think I wanna spend the kind of draft capital that it would take the Patriots to acquire a real BAMF on either side of the ball tbh

I honestly cannot think of a guy who I thought was a certain type of guy who turned out to be completely different once they got here than Stef Diggs in recent memory. Maybe when we traded for Aqib Talib? This guy rules

Oh baby, the libs would be SO owned if you, one of the chief viziers to the godking, loudly announce that you and your boy are the ones ruining everyone’s holidays

Defector comments are truly the cream of the crop cause where else can you go to read a blog about Jayden Daniels and see his injury described as “Cronenbergian”