Goddammit drunk poppins ate the chicken I was saving for breakfast

lol jk

sorry im too interested in making bad playlists for my wife and bff to get more followers at this time 💝

@potzer.xyz manages to span the demand of ethereal hotness, empathy and cherished wit at all times their aura will blind you

a woman told me where to find the most beautiful sunflowers as she uncoupled a brace of stimulants and threw away their paperwork, trusting me twice over.

a man with moonstone eyes said what the world needs now is George Carlin as he took three vials of my blood

i dont have a think for feet i dont honestly

i've decided i'm as funny and interesting as @fairygodmegan.bsky.social and i deserve twice their followers. proceed.

Many people are saying:

There’s a double meaning in that.

Dye-drate comes in a little glass vial

Taliesin Jaffe has once again created a character I desperately lust for

“I’m wet”

give it up to god if your first word was “motorcycle” 🙏🏻

put a finger down if you lost sensation in the tips of your fingers because the gold foil at the borders of the baseboard of your childhood bedroom warned you not to touch tongues with your friends but you did it anyway

Do you have any memories of plastic bins full of strange toys that aren’t yours that you only remember in flashbacks when your parents were driving you home in their Toyota Previa and the moon spoke to you for the first time put a finger down

Hozier was the joy Remmick wasn’t worthy of knowing

I’m negative nine votes down on a Reddit post and I need a little tongue on my face

Dye-drate comes in a little glass vial

Hozier was the joy Remmick wasn’t worthy of knowing

When I get enough glasses of blush wine in there’s only one thing that’ll sooth my ragged nerves

Chop time 💈

I feel like shiiiiiiit 🫩👍

Also, omg, have you guys seen my new tattoo??

Does anyone have a spare genie I can get to make it so I never have to sleep again because barring the inevitable consequences this legit rules

Yo whaddup still conscious eeeeeeyyyhhhhh 😜

This one was inspired by Omega Mart in Las Vegas, NV.

Also, omg, have you guys seen my new tattoo??

lol literally just got off the phone with emergency care, we both think im going to be fine but I do have the number for poison control currently written in green marker on my forearm at her insistence “just in case”

haha it’s not the mania it’s the accidental vyvanse

This also means I took four times my normal dose which im pretty sure is medically fine, but im riding a shooting star into a pulsar void made of holy geometry

Your girl definitely took vyvanse instead of gabapentin but tbh idk how hard I can blame myself for this one. Why do they look the same, are they trying to kill me. It’s gonna be an interesting night.

The way Abby Thorn gives away her Philosophy degree for free, I want to give away my therapy masters but with asmr this is a great idea im a genius

So many movies this year that I was excited for that I really, really wish had cooked a bit longer and gone through like one more draft.

Love it when I get a burst of manic energy the second I snuggle into bed. In other news I’m getting an undercut and starting an ASMR channel

How cool would it have been though if I stretched, yawned and looked out the window to seeing just grips of people floating up into the sky

The new ruler of the universe has had enough of your nonsense.

gods my hair is so soft and this playlist is so sad

when I forget to pay attention to my hair I become either lion or snake. Never both. But wouldn’t it be something to see me rooted with both faces. Fearsome.

I’ll worship now the ph balanced chimera, pearl polished, super pink glow boosting exfoliating clay pore shrinking smoothing softening Made In France blessed be to her purify me

space goatse, coast to coatse

Welp. I’m still here.

My heaven is a coterie of my favorite people first cooking together then lounging and munching what they’ve made together, watching and listening to their favorite stories together and I get to be there, around the whole time, loved and wanted as well.