Would love to have a boyfriend that is just a little bit dumber than me 😍😍 like yes baby let me do those pesky math problems while you harvest the fields

Do we think I might do well on FetLife? Are gingers in high demand…

Love how gays will blatantly ignore a parallelogram shaped head if you have a decent body

Reminder: Real happiness/satisfaction comes from within…if you are always searching for it externally, you will always be left searching/wanting 😌

Am I the only one who doesn’t remember Alien: Covenant at all?? I may have never seen it but am being fed propaganda about it and now I need to watch…

I need less straight & lesbian attention and more faggotry immediately

This & Demon Slayer

I’m really out here sending nudes on instagram to get people to play video games with me….bring back shame in 2025 😔

Anyone wanna come over and watch me play demon souls..

Once the resist libs get a hold of a post…..DELETE! The dopamine from likes won’t even overcome the insufferable commentary

Hey guys I got a clip job what do we think

Fuck fags

Going to a second exercise class today for 2 reasons: 1. Mental illness 2. Unfathomably hot twunk with tattoos was in this class last week and I need him to turn my pelvis into dust

I have a special talent for absolutely destroying work laptops so they become unusable in a very short amount of time. I really don’t know how I do it….

Famous last words…2 pics and asking me to message on signal…I might be cute but not dumb 😇

Astigmatism makes cruising impossible…one day I’ll get contacts and be unstoppable

i just know a brazilian man could fix me

Love when I try to take a pic and I’m like ok I’m actually ugly asf!!! Better luck tomorrow bitch

Preparing corporate budgets in my living room when instead someone should be kissing my circumcision scar (they hurt me 😩)

Roommate/bf could fix me….i need to feel shame about my shopping and food delivery habits 😔

Fuck

Saturday pov

Should I delete tinder and hinge and go to Omegle?? I’ll use classifieds before I touch Grindr for another thousand years

Not to make it about me but why the FUCK do none of the people emojis have red hair….

2nd time this week I’ve been told ppl can’t tell im faggot…how do we fix this? Can you be a 6’1” 205lb femboy?

Do not ever show me Ed Sh*eran on my new music Friday playlist again

5-course meal with this one ngl

now that's how you clear a bitch

Just scraping by today…need a haircut so badly, sinuses eating me tf up, undereye bags going crazy.

Need bf to stir my guts around like a brand new Vitamix

No one asked, and I’m not usually one to disappoint….BUT the only place a fist is going (ever) is MY MOUTH.

Creatine PAUSE

Squeak squeak squeak

Require 1-3 hrs of exercise/day Plain meals bc im lazy I might as well be the family pet

Tip: Any joke related to someone’s name is not clever or witty. Someone equally as dumb as you has already made the joke before and we never found it funny :)

The duality of being competent in the workplace and subsequently getting assignments that I have 0 experience with 😇

If I’m at a man’s house and he starts pulling out chemistry equipment to make a coffee I am fucking leaving immediately

Need them to start making hot men irl and not just on the internet

Cookie Monster pajamas, a camel crush, and a rural Walmart would fix me

Should I cull the mustache today? Will that please shareholders…

BoySky™️

2nd time I’ve matched with a personal trainer at my work gym

I think I exploded my ACL last Wednesday…watch this space 😌

Off until Tuesday…what should we do?

Accidentally put cayenne pepper in my oatmeal instead of cinnamon 😞

The crumbl cookie CEO is gay but everyone is missing the point that they don’t taste good

Favorite part of falling asleep is jerking awake prior to deep sleep because it feels like someone else is in the room

Spent the past 3 days eating like each meal was my last and I’ve GOT to end that streak

Good Morning (gays only)

My feeling when Kali Uchis said yo quiero sentirte inside of me