more like “wicked no good”

h-hey guys… can i be spongebob?

COMING STRAIGHT FROM YOUR HOUSE!!!!!! COMING!

koda’s asleep but i want to talk so now what

i should’ve been a 6’2 man with long flowing locks but instead i’m 5’3 and bald with one strand of hair with a bow on it

i do think one of the happiest times of my life was when the first 5 fnaf games came out. nothing beats the theorizing and finding the easter eggs in real time

i love freaking the fuck out i can’t get enough of

sometimes i get so hungry i become evil and then i eat and become normal. such is life

if u are on a bus and decide to sit on the outside seat to make it harder for someone to take the empty seat beside u go fuck urself

@cuntcestor.bsky.social if you’re reading this i’m gonna get u

Fuuuck i could really go for an itch rn

non-binary friend named itch

i’m ftm (female to muppet)

uncle komg

please don’t use this against me

i have never done bloody mary and i’m still too scared like i’m prob never going to

is this a safe space to say i hate pentatonix.

how i felt winning catan

gonna start telling people al is short for alucard

my whole life i’ve had such vivid reoccurring dreams i was flying i swear i bet i could do it irl

thought i handled the divorce well but looking back i was convinced i had crows following me and i prayed to hades. to be fair my prayers were answered and my friends also saw the crows so….

girl you need a shot of B12

sometimes a scheme is necessary to keep ur sanity

it’s crazy how free i am after my period i’m hooting and hollering i’m free i’m whimsical i’m crying over black eyed peas life’s beautiful i’m gonna take my top off

streets are calling me spiders georg

just sipped my water bottle and felt something against my tongue and spit out my water and this guy was in the straw and now i’m never going to sleep again

at the point in my cycle where everything is hopeless

okay i need two gofundmes one for top surgery and one to move out of my dads basement. i accept cheques, e-transfer, robux, and overwatch credits

i’ve never seen chicken little

dming dnd for the first time in like a month super excited but also the thought of prepping making me wanna pull my eyeballs out rn

new slimey just dropped

im bald im chopped i’m unc i have no prospects and i’m probably trans but i can’t worry about that right now

togoretastic

my septum stretch has been very divisive in the community

just thought about rouxls and started tearing up

this is where i’m at

My son: Dad, I don’t WANT to do a heavily modded playthrough of fallout new Vegas, I want to ✨dance✨ Me: your mothers been showing you Hamilton again? My wife: He wants to- Me: He doesn’t KNOW what he wants!! (I slam the garage door and finger 11s Paralyzer begins to play)

just an unprompted attack from my mom

linkdin keeps deadnaming and misgendering me

the wizard was setting the house on fire and demanding 2dozen rolls of toilet paper and my dad was rlly worried about it but it’s okay i brought them up

if i smoke weed there’s a 100% chance i will find the closest person to me and start talking about deltarune

i feel like the boy who lived

drunk ethan in the uber as dance monkey is playing keeps saying to turn it up and it’s so loud now

fahad after sleeping for 3 hours after getting crossed: i wasn’t sleeping i was healing

high as fuck on the subway and just saw gore that’s gore of my comfort character (spamton) when i opened twitter i’m gonna freak out

i love being graduated and unemployed living in my fathers basement reading spamtenna fanfic and playing lego batman 3. this is my peak form

put ur hands up if u have a nephew. and keep em up if he’s in the building

holy shit

tricky tony symphony today