Today was DOJ's court-ordered deadline for releasing unredacted FBI records about Trump's 13-year-old r*pe victim. And they blew it. Here is the sum total of mainstream U.S. news coverage about it from the last 24 hours. Thanks for nothing, eh, @katiephang.bsky.social?

You'd never know from the total of zero Epstein mentions at @nytimes.com and @washingtonpost.com, or from the blissfully ignorant tweets of prominent Beltway reporters, but today is Todd Blanche's court-imposed deadline for releasing the missing FBI testimony of Trump's 13-year-old rape victim.

Last Thursday, a federal judge gave DOJ one week to unredact FBI interviews with a 13-year-old Trump r*pe victim, or explain its refusal to do so. And while the conservative Washington Examiner cashed in with a blindingly obvious headline, the hated “liberal media” has buried the lede.

You'd never know from the total of zero "Epstein" mentions at @washingtonpost.com, but Americans just learned that Trump was never "sympathetic to his supporters' concerns" about his best friend's crimes against children, and never had any "interest" in keeping his campaign promise of transparency.

You'd never know from the total of zero Trump-Epstein headlines at @nytimes.com, but Trump fired last week's star Epstein witness for releasing the unsettling testimony of his 13-year-old rape victim, and has not denied the allegations his own FBI deemed credible.

You'd never know from the total of zero "Epstein" headlines at @washingtonpost.com, but Trump's disgraced former child sex crimes coverup coordinator sat for an oft-delayed Epstein interview last week, and the transcript released yesterday shows that she refused to answer Trump-related questions.

You'd never know from the total of zero "Epstein" headlines at @nytimes.com and @washingtonpost.com, but Trump's disgraced former child sex crimes coverup coordinator sat for an oft-delayed Epstein interview four days ago, and declined to say whether Trump ordered the withholding of specific files.

30 days since Trump fired Bondi to prevent her Epstein testimony. 6 days since Trump bought her silence by giving her a new job. 3 days since she declined to answer Trump-related Epstein questions from lawmakers. 1 Bondi-Epstein headline at @washingtonpost.com that mentions none of the above.

30 days since Trump fired Bondi to prevent her Epstein testimony. 6 days since Trump bought her silence by giving her a new job. 3 days since she declined to answer Trump-related Epstein questions from lawmakers. 1 Trump-adjacent "Epstein" headline at @nytimes.com that mentions none of the above.

You'd never know from the total of zero "Bondi" and "Epstein" mentions at @nytimes.com and @washingtonpost.com, but Pam Bondi will finally field Epstein questions from lawmakers today, and the guy who delayed her testimony by firing her just bribed her with a new job.

Pam Bondi's long-awaited Epstein testimony is scheduled for tomorrow, and she is expected to say nothing about the ongoing White House coverup, because Trump just bribed her with a new job. But, of course, there are zero "Epstein" headlines at @nytimes.com and @washingtonpost.com

You'd never know from the total of zero "Epstein" headlines at @nytimes.com and @washingtonpost.com, but Pam Bondi's oft-delayed sit-down with the House Oversight Committee is scheduled for tomorrow, and Trump just bought her silence by giving her a new job.

No one knows if Pam Bondi got fired because she had botched her attempted coverup of a 13-year-old Trump rape victim's testimony, and had just been subpoenaed to discuss it under oath. But two days ahead of her hotly anticipated Epstein interview, "Epstein" headlines are nowhere to be found.

You'd never know from the total of zero "Epstein" headlines at @nytimes.com and @washingtonpost.com, but two days ahead of Pam Bondi's oft-delayed sit-down with the House Oversight Committee, Trump is still illegally hoarding 2.5 million Epstein files and mulling a pardon for Ghislaine Maxwell.

No one knows if Pam Bondi got fired because she had botched her attempted coverup of a 13-year-old Trump rape victim's testimony, and had just been subpoenaed to discuss it under oath. But three days ahead of her oft-delayed Epstein interview, "Epstein" headlines are nowhere to be found.

You'd never know from the total of zero "Epstein" headlines at @nytimes.com and @washingtonpost.com, but three days ahead of Pam Bondi's oft-delayed sit-down with the House Oversight Committee, Trump is still illegally hoarding 2.5 million Epstein files and mulling a pardon for Ghislaine Maxwell.

Jeffrey Koterba, Omaha World Herald

The congressional switchboard number is (202) 224-3121. Put it in your cell phone. Use it. If you're not calling at least once a week, you're not doing your part.

Mike Luckovich, Atlanta Journal Constitution

“What earth is Jeff Bezos on and where are the peptides that he's getting?” @timmiller.bsky.social, @sarahlongwell25.bsky.social and @samsteindc.bsky.social talk Bezos glazing Trump at our live show in San Diego.

Introduce yourself with 10 bands / musicians you've seen live The Who The Police The Flaming Lips Cheap Trick Elvis Costello and the Imposters Bo Diddley U2 Page and Plant Pearl Jam Ween

You'd never know from the total of zero "Epstein" headlines at @nytimes.com and @washingtonpost.com, but 10 days ahead of Pam Bondi's hotly anticipated grilling by the House Oversight Committee, Trump is still illegally hoarding 2.5 million Epstein files and mulling a pardon for Ghislaine Maxwell.

You'd never know from the total of zero "Epstein" headlines at @washingtonpost.com, but one week ahead of Pam Bondi's hotly anticipated sit-down with the House Oversight Committee, President Trump is still mulling a pardon for Ghislaine Maxwell and illegally hoarding 2.5 million Epstein files.

You'd never know from the lone "Epstein" headline at @nytimes.com, over a story that mentions neither Trump nor next week's oft-delayed Pam Bondi interview, but the White House is still illegally hoarding 2.5 million Epstein files and mulling a pardon for Trump's convicted Palm Beach pedophile pal.

“This is a defining moment for the Republican Party… If we do not reject this way of thinking clearly, without any ambiguity, we will have lost our way. If we don’t reject it, we’ve lost the moral authority, in my view, to govern this country.” —Lindsey Graham on Trumpism, c. 2016

You'd never know from the total of zero "Epstein" headlines at @washingtonpost.com, but 14 days ahead of Pam Bondi's hotly anticipated sit-down with the House Oversight Committee, President Trump is still illegally hoarding 2.5 million Epstein files and mulling a pardon for Ghislaine Maxwell.

You'd never know from the lone "Epstein" headline at @nytimes.com, over a story that mentions neither Trump nor the testimony of his 13-year-old rape victim, but the White House is still hoarding 2.5 million Epstein files and mulling a pardon for Trump's Palm Beach pedophile pal Ghislaine Maxwell.

You'd never know from the total of zero "Epstein" headlines at @washingtonpost.com, but 17 days ahead of Pam Bondi's oft-delayed interview with the House Oversight Committee, President Trump is still illegally hoarding 2.5 million Epstein files and mulling a pardon for Ghislaine Maxwell.

If Trump follows through on his threat to invade Cuba, the Democrats who pushed for the release of the Epstein files will have even more blood on their hands.

You'd never know from the total of zero "Epstein" headlines at @nytimes.com and @washingtonpost.com, but two weeks before Bondi's hotly anticipated appearance before the House Oversight Committee, Trump is still illegally hoarding 2.5 million Epstein files and mulling a pardon for Ghislaine Maxwell.

TRUMP SAYS “TRUMP SAYS” HEADLINES THAT DON’T ALSO SAY “E*****N” ARE HIS FAVORITE

Katie Phang visits the Donald J. Trump Jeffrey Epstein Memorial Reading Room, an exhibition that displays the 3,437 volumes of The Epstein Files. “Each of them weighs about 5 lb. … 3.5 million files bound into 800-page volumes. Altogether, it weighs about 17,000 lb.”

You'd never know from the lone "Epstein" headline at @nytimes.com, over a two-day-old story that does not mention Trump, but his DOJ is still illegally hoarding 2.5 million Epstein files and mulling a pardon for his Palm Beach p***phile pal Ghislaine Maxwell.

61 days since Pam Bondi was forced to release credible Trump rape evidence she'd tried to bury. 33 days since Trump delayed her Epstein testimony by firing her. 9 days since Trump melted down about Epstein in response to a WHCA shooting question. Zero "Epstein" headlines at @washingtonpost.com

You'd never know from the lone non-coverup-related "Epstein" headline at @nytimes.com, but eight weeks after Pam Bondi doomed herself by releasing credible Trump rape evidence she'd been caught trying to conceal, the Trump DOJ is still illegally hoarding 2.5 million Epstein files.

60 days since Bondi was forced to release credible Trump rape evidence she'd tried to bury. 32 days since Trump delayed her Epstein testimony by firing her. 20 days since her successor confirmed that DOJ is withholding "millions" more Epstein files. Zero "Epstein" headlines at @washingtonpost.com

60 days since Bondi was forced to release credible Trump rape evidence she'd tried to bury. 32 days since Trump delayed her Epstein testimony by firing her. 8 days since Trump melted down about Epstein in response to a WHCA shooting question. 1 non-Trump-related "Epstein" headline at @nytimes.com

10 YEARS OF “RUSSIA RUSSIA RUSSIA” TAUNTS MAKE THIS NOT MAKE SENSE

57 days since Pam Bondi agreed to release credible Trump rape evidence she'd been caught trying to conceal. 29 days since Trump preempted her April 14 Epstein testimony by firing her. 2 days since her testimony was re-scheduled for May 29. Zero "Epstein" headlines at @washingtonpost.com

The attempt on Trump’s life two days ago means the upcoming election is indefinitely deferred until civility is returned to a nation divided. by Marc Thiessen Nov 2, 2028

If a broadcast network runs a segment decrying those who commit rape and pedophilia, then by law they must give equal time to President Trump. by Brendan Carr

55 days since Pam Bondi agreed to release credible Trump rape evidence she'd been caught trying to conceal. 27 days since Trump preempted her April 14 Epstein testimony by firing her. 1 hour since her testimony was re-scheduled for May 29. Zero "Epstein" headlines at @washingtonpost.com

SAVVY REPUBLICANS SUMMON RED WAVE BY TELLING VOTERS TO GO F*** THEMSELVES

53 days since Bondi released Trump rape evidence she'd been caught trying to conceal. 25 days since Trump blocked her scheduled Epstein testimony by firing her. 1 day since Trump melted down about "Epstein" in response to a WHCA shooting question. Zero "Epstein" headlines at @washingtonpost.com

You'd never know from the lone week-old "Epstein" headline at @nytimes.com, but in interview aired last night, President Trump responded to a question about the WHCA shooter by bringing up the 2.5 million unreleased Epstein files and screaming about how he's not "a rapist" or "a pedophile."

JOURNALISTS ARE DEFINING MORALITY DOWN BY PLAYING DUMB ABOUT TRUMP’S 13-YEAR-OLD R*PE VICTIM

He seems happy

Notice that Norah didn't say the shooter was directly referencing Trump. He just immediately went there.

We have collectively watched three people get murdered on video in cold blood since September