This is not an advertisement. This is an announcement that I am moving to Europe so I have access to this drink. It is the nectar of the GODS

Reminder that even if you see someone stealing food... you didn't see anyone stealing food. Don't be a snitch. There's gonna be a lot of people who need to steal food, and they don't need you being an asshole. 1 out of 8 american citizens are on food assistance.

Why are my organs so intense

Does anyone know how to make sandwiches?

Congratulations to the World Series!

What do you do for likes in the the real world?

white house has joined bluesky click here to block all official us government accounts instantly bsky.app/profile/did:...

6 years ago today, I met the original twister! (cmon babyyy)

I have reason to believe I am going to be the first sentient AI.

Melon www.youtube.com/watch?v=MzZn...

Our Lady of Catholicism Catholic Church

The only acceptable way, and only way I will respond to someone calling me Christopher is if they do it in Adriana's voice, from the Sopranos.

You've never heard of me, I'm pretty big, almost 200lbs

!!! empireatx.com/events/mclus... !!!

As someone who likes to joke around, comedies often hit a little too close to home

Democrats should be putting all their energy into doxxing and posting names and addresses of ICE agents.

We really missed out on True Blood being around in the 2020s and having an "OnlyFangs" storyline

By far the best standup comedy one liner of this stupid decade

I was tired of my thermal printer always jamming up and noticed a piece of wood from a broken pallet was just the perfect length to cut up. Most of the 2 hours it took to whip this together was holding the bottom two pieces together while the glue dried enough to hold them together, and sanding.

Every cent I have goes towards money every month.

Meet me on my wordpress comments at 10pm, refresh the page until I say hi

remember fun internet?

They never make enough chips

I wonder if Charlie Kirk can hear all this praise from hell?

I eat 7 sandwiches every single day, regardless of other meals.

What's up Youtube, today I'm going to eat 10 of these TEMU Big Macs, but first, let me pay my tariff.

"Who gives a shit?" Well, if you ask a toilet, we all do.

Not to get political, but the real power in the USA comes from the outlets in the walls.

I'm getting really good at counting. Ask me any number, I could probably count to it.

Anyone who's got the tag "User - Occasional AI Imagery"... that's a block already.

ICE is turning around now, escorted by Broadview police. Crowd is jubilant. Someone is shouting, "this is what it takes! They are turning around!"

Did you know there's a sect of the cult of Christianity that believes when they go to heaven they will remember nothing of this earth, just instead sit for an eternity, with no knowledge of anything other than God, and just worship that God. That sounds like hell.

Happy Birthday to everyone who celebrates.

This is why the American public loves Luigi Mangione and considers him a hero of the people. www.bbc.com/news/article...

Is he dead yet?

Please let him be dead, please let them announce it Labor Day Weekend.

Imagining the enthusiasts when they invent telepathy. "bro, you're gonna get left behind if you don't embrace stealing other people's thoughts"

Remember that Friends where they were having surprise party in both apartment for Rachel, and how Chandler made all the women go to his apartment, but specifically left out all three of the black women who were at the party.

I'm getting a pizza tonight. It's decided.

This weekend I made some pretty good porky road ice cream. It's where you replace the marshmallows in a tub of rocky road with little pieces of ham.

I've got a great idea for a TV show. It's called "Jail College". An entire class of a local college is found guilty of a crime and due to limited jail space, the dorms are converted to cells. The Dean is the warden "AKA: Dean Warden"

Did the sex trafficker of children say her client, admitted child-rapist President Don didn't do anything wrong yet?

Excuse me, can I borrow the correct length of wire?

It's a rare thing to have a theater full of laughter for 85 minutes, def go see The Naked Gun in theaters!

Just posting these in advance: Wow, I am shocked that Ghislaine killed herself! or Wow, I am shocked that Ghislaine escaped!

I shower once every other day, I pee in the yard, I only drink mountain dew. You're welcome earth.