“professional-grade logistics” lol bro this is like average coordination with your kid’s friends’ parents for going sledding at the Good Hill later this afternoon

it’s that time again

Kare 11 local news just read, in full, this statement from Michael and Susan Pretti, the parents of Alex Pretti. "Please get the truth out about our son."

It seems clear Alex Pretti, a healthcare worker, was murdered for engaging in the exact kind of community care we hope all care workers to embody: the kind that doesn’t stop at the threshold of the hospital, the clinic, but that aims to care for and support the community where and how they can

actually, the moderate position is redacted

oot and aboot review: at least it’s not windy? yet?

the moderate position remains “straight to the hague do not pass go”

the meanest thing a european has ever said to me while traveling was when i was working in italy — i declined a cigarette from a guy who then silently lit one, took a drag, exhaled and said, "all you americans think you'll never die"

okay on the bright side the four boxes of girl scout cookies i bought from a trans scout arrived

dunkin advertising their lattes as being made with “protein milk” ………… okay why does that feel like it’s cum though

12 days into 2026 like

check this shit out motherfucker *hits self in dick with kettlebell, its not clear what kind of move I was trying to do*

you don't have to watch more awful video but it's apparent what these insults to bottom-dwellers, absolute scum of the earth motherfuckers find exculpatory: their victims being visibly queer, being joyfully defiant, being unafraid, being women

sat around and cried for a solid 10 minutes this morning after my family left for the day—good work if you can get it!

A friend in Minneapolis just sent me this video. Looks like thousands have come together for a vigil after an ICE agent shot and killed 37-year-old Renee Nicole Good. This was my neighborhood for several years before coming to Portland.

Really worth watching this interview with a bystander who witnessed the ICE shooting in Minneapolis: "I'm pretty right-leaning. But seeing this, this is not how we're supposed to be doing things in America.”

wow stuff is grim but on the other hand i donated like two gallons of pumped breast milk to support vulnerable lil bbs—luv 2 do a tits-based public good

truly has there been a better face on television than michele solara

welp

I feel like I haven’t even been properly lied to about the purposes of this war

Outlook for the new year ...

a not-so-funny part of this is this is not enough daycares—it’s nigh impossible to find spot in daycare around here!! we had to start looking before our kid was born!! but also if one of these dudes shows up at my son’s daycare I will [redacted]

no one who is younger and funnier than me is allowed to die—it’s not right!

post offices with threatening auras

looks like this one still works! samizdat 5ever

okay I also love the gay hockey show

It's your birthday, Duane.

can't wait!!!! (i assume i'm godzilla)

squeeze! squeeze!

first of all: you don't have to have skill to be creative! you can just ... make a thing! it's not illegal!! the gatekeepers are only in your head!!!!!

tossing like slumberers in their beds; the ever-rolling waves but made so by their restlessness

much better

i love that i still get the occasional email about a thing i wrote for the awl about boston sand & gravel—the most impactful thing i've written by miles lol

me at the airport pulling a hustlers on dudes in business class by challenging them to a pull-up contest for their seat

coulda called it the nobel peeFA prize

new york review of new york review of books personals ads

hell still not hot enough for everyone involved

diamonds and rust (10 minute version) (joan's version)

me eating 10 crab rangoons: haha fuck yeah!! yes!! me 40 minutes after eating 10 crab rangoons: well this fucking sucks. what the fuck.

jd vance sobbing in the bathroom looking at this

the globe's editorial board is run by some of the doofiest just-asking-questions-ass centrists and everyone should tell them to take their shitty substack ideas and go to hell

i expect my esteemed alma mater to resolutely denounce this student and his actions! waiting patiently ...... any day now ..............

today's my dad's birthday; in honor of it, everyone do something a little bit stupid, the purpose of which is primarily to entertain yourself—it's what my dad would have done!

i like weed and healthcare and feeding people and being gay and apparently there’s no political party for that in america