if your car alarm goes off more than twice in an hour, i should be allowed to light it on fire. i can be trusted with this power.

my doctor and i agreed on a medication for me between pharmacy bullshit and how long turnaround clarifications from this busy ass MD are, we're 3 weeks past and i still don't know when i'll be able to get this shit and if i'll have to pay $80 a month out of pocket or not for it USA #1 baby!!!!!!!!

i got news from my doctor monday that i need to make a couple small adjustments to my diet for blood health my local coffee shop didn't sell many donuts today and just gave me a whole box for free the universe is trying me for tipping well (i gave the donuts away)

t4t musician4musician going through a rough breakup be like:

currently embroiled in very serious domestic problems such as the financial benefits of buying rice in bulk vs "where the fuck would i store all this rice in my san francisco apartment"

If I were an ascending superpower right now, I would do everything I could to convince the dumbass legacy rival superpower to pour everything into AI, while I spent a large majority of government science funds cementing my dominance in renewable energy.

san francisco we have to start a feud with nyc and outdo them by electing an outright commie to the office of the mayor

Zohran at the rally for trans youth on february 8 ❣️ he was polling single digits.

nvm i read the news and it's soothing the damage from the horrors

when the sun sets at 5pm for the third day in a row

when the sun sets at 5pm for the third day in a row

if you wish to spite the memory of dick cheney you can one-up him by shooting your friend in the face with a shotgun and then admitting wrongdoing

i can't not click on this much concentrated awful which is the primary reason the internet has been bad for my mental health

walked and talked for 10 miles yesterday and my GOD everything is sore

so hungry i misread clipper card as clipper carb

"Friends" is a beloved American sitcom that aired from 1994 to 2004, following six young adults—Rachel, Ross, Monica, Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe—living in New York City. The show explores their friendships, romances, careers, and personal growth over ten seasons.

i know it's rarely meant this way but i feel insulted when people compare my media thoughts and opinions to some youtuber's or worse, just say "oh you watched a video by X" i TALK to people about what i'm reading/watching/playing to develop my opinions, not Consume Content to have them handed to me

oh sick it turns out we took out half the internet on monday with a DNS error because of course it was DNS it's fucking always DNS aws.amazon.com/message/1019...

dude i think my phone is bad for me

Being a transsexual puts you at an inherent advantage with FPGA engineering, since you already have experience with reconfigurable hardware alongside minimizing clocking issues.

i know god's a dyke because i'm so loveable and that bitch is cruel to me just to fish for a reaction

reaching new lows in media literacy by having "the matrix didn't do a good job convincing me that the real world was the better option" takes put in front of my own eyes

i'm spending this weekend in a forest in northern california and it's either going to be good for me to be without cell service for a weekend or give me incurable mental illness and turn me into a hippie

5 books and a weekend without cell service would not fix me but it would probably alleviate like at least two of my current brainworms

estrogen injection kurosawa edition

some of my friends have like 100 followers and then i find out they have nsfw alt accounts with like 2k followers and it becomes so clear that the people want your most unapologetically horny thoughts and they want them now

i want someone to love me the way baseball fans love insane statistics

we’re going to have to invent a treatment for lowtax syndrome if society wants to keep this social media thing going

horrified to learn my aim is way better after 2 drinks

it's happening again folks, everyone draw up your syringe of delusion as we contemplate the splendor of possibility and the joy inherent in schrödinger's box while it's unopened

I burst into tears at this. Even after 5 1/2 years with it, positive scientific confirmation of what I knew - this is real, I’m not imagining it, it’s not ageing, it’s not depression or anxiety, it’s that my brain *does not function properly* - means so much. And a big step towards treatment too.

Frosty Faustings 2026 babyyyyyy looking forward to freezing my ass off every time i have to leave the hotel

a kitten passed out on me at dinner last night and this morning i woke up at peace naturally i ruined this by checking the news

marxist authors are singularly goofy they’ll write two commies hate fucking in the middle of a novel and use “private property” as a safe word

truly remarkable how the nature of the news cycle makes mondays depressing even for our friends without 9-5s, a+ world we’ve built

marxist authors are singularly goofy they’ll write two commies hate fucking in the middle of a novel and use “private property” as a safe word

really wish i could tell the difference between getting stared at because someone is a bigot and stare at because 6 foot tall woman wearing all black

i love having short friends they’ll make a huge deal out of mundane shit like “being able to see the top of the fridge unassisted” and you’ll briefly feel cool

earthquake happens -> determine you're not going to die -> immediately post about earthquake

someone called me tia/auntie last night

one day you graduate college and the next you're the oldest woman in the queer gamer discord call this is so fucked up

the writers keep using me as yuribait

modern automatic targeting and motion prediction systems are a shiny toy that ultimately hinder the development of intuition around how enemy mechs move that are necessary for an ace pilot's tactical movement. they make you weak and predictable.

earthquake happens -> determine you're not going to die -> immediately post about earthquake

aftershocks are crazy

EARTHQUAKE

i'm sure there's much more interesting forms of disrespect in 2xko but point blank assist -> tbag spam -> tag is *very* funny

pretty sure i have an llm spambot in my texts soliciting suggestions on something i can ask it to do to smoke a ton of compute and cost the spammer money

every time i've liked a joke this week it's felt like this