Stan Wawrinka’s retirement party in Melbourne has been officially postponed! Through to the second round in 4.

I reserved judgement until seeing them on court, but yes, all Nike tennis players should boycott their kits. Even Alcaraz. Heinous. #AO2026

Turned on the tennis and caught Crowded House performing Don’t Dream It’s Over. 10/10. It’s all gone a bit flaggy now though. Bring on Roger!

An UNPRECEDENTED DOUBLE Taking Out the Trash Trophy goes to #AustralianOpen #OnePointSlam icon, Joanna Garland. 🎾👸

Stan with the break in the second! Has he hit the sweet spot for the timing of his retirement? Still able to take out the odd top 30 player (e.g. Rinderknech) and keep it exciting when he loses (eg Cobolli)? #UnitedCup 🎾

“i want back my rocking chairs, / solipsist sunsets, / & coastal jungle sounds...” A poem by Renee Nicole Good, who was murdered by ICE earlier today. lithub.com/renee-nicole...

It was not "domestic terrorism.” It was state sanctioned violence. A family will forever live with the pain caused by the admin's reckless and deadly actions. Abolishing ICE is not enough. They must be held accountable.

Hurkacz is channeling flamingo power. 🦩 #UnitedCup 🎾

Questionable to slap a discount appliance shop-looking sign on such a cool arena. #UnitedCup 🎾

That’s right, Hubert Hurkacz, you and Team Poland won the FIRST Taking Out the Trash Trophy of 2026. Brawo! #UnitedCup 🎾

I have REALLY good news for the whippersnappers who liked the guy who sang Somewhere Over the Rainbow at Mamdani’s inauguration: open.spotify.com/album/39reYi...

January 2 watching United Cup like I found an ice-cold Coke after crossing the desert. 🎾🦘

My MiL endearingly thinks Mambo No. 5 is a Christmas song. *loads up the playlist*

The Bluesky tennis feed is just Catalan people wishing each other a ‘Bon Nadal.’ 😂🎾🫠

This is designed to become terf propaganda and I wouldn’t watch Kyrgios if you paid me. www.theguardian.com/sport/2025/d...

Perry is to Brand<Trudeau as Kalinskaya is to Kyrgios<Sinner

2026 predictions: a different woman wins each major, including a surprise Czech. Iga will beat Alcaraz to the career slam by one day. The WTA Finals photo will look like my dad took it before prom.

I should have been rooting for Spain, but Cobolli and Berrettini were SUCH a Davis Cup vibe! Three-peating sans Sinner and Musetti is incredible. Such depth! 🇮🇹🎾🤯

And the final Taking Out The Trash Trophy of 2025 goes to a red hot Félix Auger-Aliassime! Well done, sir!

After his nightmarish, exhausting journey to qualify, I am so pleased for Musetti that he at least got this win in front of his home crowd.

That aged well!

I can’t wait for Rybakina to win the WTA Finals and not react, which will perfectly complement the vibe of Saudi tennis events.🎾😒

Looks like I have the chapter headings for my next book sorted

Help, I’m using up my entire quota of Guardian articles on Lily Allen West End Girl thinkpieces.

Rybakina’s serving is terrifying. Well done to Anisimova for not just curling up in the fetal position. #wtafinals

In case you blinked and missed it, Sinner Took Out the Trash rather emphatically in Paris for two in a row!

Let it a bit late this week, lads! You made Sinner get his hands dirty, but of course Jannik Takes Out The Trash in Vienna! 🥕🎾🚮🏆

Underfunded Schools Forced To Cut Past Tense From Language Programs

This is a wild stat, and the final against Moutet in Almaty was insane; come for the crafty rallies and stay for the outfits: www.atptour.com/en/video/ext...

The head of @netflix.com marketing realising the #SixKingsSlam final is on #NOKINGS day. (PS Boo sportswashing!)

#NoKings ad for Dubuque, Iowa 🤣🔥

The ATP needs more francophone crying. 🎾 🇫🇷 🇲🇨 🥹

Rinderknope! The lanky Frenchman bags a second Taking Out the Trash Trophy this year in Shanghai. Allez!

AMANDA DAMN ANISIMOVA! Loses a heartbreaker at the US Open final. Wins her very next tournament -- after getting her wisdom tooth out the day she flew (OMG) -- winning the China Open for her 2nd WTA 1000 trophy of the year.

Some good news out of the tire fire that is America right now: www.theguardian.com/us-news/2025...

KOKO THE GORILLA: Koko birkin bag. Practical Koko possession bag RESEARCHER: No, Koko. You can’t have a Birkin bag. KOKO: Good Birkin good Koko give beautiful Koko deserve gorilla RESEARCHER: Koko, we simply can’t afford a Birkin bag. It is an unjustifiable expense. KOKO: jealousy professor

Meddy must have an entire room in his house in Monte Carlo to store all his Taking Out the Trash trophies. He racks up another in Beijing. 🙌

A special Laver Cup edition of the Taking Out The Trash Trophy for Demon!

The fact that @bjkcup.bsky.social hasn’t even posted on @bsky.app DURING the finals makes me think that as much as I have enjoyed not using twitter, #tennis is really just not happening here. Who else should I be following? 🎾

‘Is that a fox screaming or one of my children?’ is a very London question I just had to consider.

Mouth hanging open at Barbora Krejcikova saving 8 match points on Armstrong! The DRAMA! 🍿🎾

FAA TOTT US Open. Allez, Félix!

The correct outcome.

Sara Errani after winning US Open mixed doubles with Vavassori against Swiatek & Ruud in the final “I think this one is for all the doubles players that couldn’t play this tournament. I think this one is also for them.” 🥹

Omg Venus holding serve in that game validated the entire format change, thank you for that moment, #USOpen

Osaka at the net… yikes.

Errani and Vavassori’s celebration when they took down Fritz and Rybakina was for doubles players everywhere! Loving the new #USOpen mixed format and I’d be lying if I said this wasn’t the first time I’ve gone out of my way to watch it, so, mission accomplished!

Carlitos wins the coveted Taking Out the Trash Trophy at the semifinal stage in Cincinnati.

And ATP workhorse Karen Khachanov wins the Taking Out the Trash trophy for Toronto. Bravo, Karen!

A compelling narrative… who to root for? The Canadian rising star on home turf or the old champion whose comeback after mat leave hasn’t been going so well… until now! 🍿