Newfound appreciation for my brother and how well-adjusted/normal he is, because I could cry in front of him and ask whether he thought it was time, and get some other answer than him locking up or avoiding the entire subject or doing anything, like my parents.

Feeling guilty for not being there for my cat in 2023 when he was put down & my parents didn't tell me & left it too long and he suffered. Feeling guilty for being there for my cat in 2025 to be put down before she suffers too much, because the car ride ended up at the vet's instead of at our cabin.

Relevant narration

Just looked out the window and automatically wondered if she was gonna be sitting in the back yard.

Hilpuri 2006-2025

When it's 2:56 am but you have to go and quickly pee under the trailer in midwinter, and are pleasantly surprised the human hold the door open for you the whole time

Be blessed by her purrs

Whole weekend I've thought about how it feels cruel that we can't take the cat to a vet until Monday, and the reality of it possibly happening before noon tomorrow is now destroying me. It's the right thing but I wish there was some other option.

Been one whole day and having to exist in proximity to my parents' horrible same-but-different emotional unavailability and lack of communication and the constant problems it causes is so exhausting

Oh great, 5am and I've just realized that part or the reason why I haven't been able to sleep is because my mother has turned the radiator in my room on full blast without asking or saying anything. Because why the fuck not.

I wish cats would just live forever. It's not fair.

My parents are an advertisement for singlehood.

Proudly told my dad that I finally got a work of fiction read and the first thing he says when opening the book is "oh, the font is really big. *Glances at a page* yeah, this English looks like I could finish it too" Mind you, I told him exactly because we've both said we haven't read a whole book

I finished Wuthering Heights. I reckon it's the first piece of fiction since the last Potter books that I've read-read, as embarrassing as that is to admit. I think the first third was really engaging, then I kinda lost interest once it became about the lives of the kids, and the end was just w/e.

I love this one of her either saying hello to a magpie or telling it to get lost

It seems that she's dying. She purrs when pet, but she's struggling with breathing. Won't really eat or clean herself. Just wants to rest. Here she is at 17 a couple years back, which is more than a lot of cats get in such good condition. But it still hurts.

The classic Finnish accent in English cracks me up

10th of October and everywhere is selling Christmas stuff. Psychotic.

Dreamt that my mom was nice and chill. Womp womp.

Love her so much. She's such a smart tiny old girl.

I got a 400e gift card from an airline a year ago for swapping to a flight 4h earlier, and I finally used the last of it and I'll miss it forever.

Apparently the cat is under the weather. Happy, but not engaging as much as usual, or following my brother around like she usually does. Not really eating. Shouldn't expect anything more considering she's 19,5 years old, but it's still upsetting.

work work

Been having to deal with men who'll avoid accountability at all costs even when they've clearly been caught, and it truly boggles my mind. Personally I never really understood the point of lying, but what really makes my eyebrows fly off my face is someone being confronted and them lying even more.

she doesn't even know what a merge conflict is

this is sorta kinda funny since he every so often slips into the whole "rich people are evil and pitting us all against each other" and other opinions bout The Man keeping the average guy down, then performs for oil princes

A supermarket was opened a 5min walk away from my flat and that makes me feel like a king.

This fucking arrest video is made with AI and I am not okay with how real this looks www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujDO...

Screamiiiinngggg 😩😩😩 love her

Saw this beautiful big dog that started barking at me relentlessly when I wanted to take a photo of it

'St Paul’s Cathedral from the River Thames by Night' by St. Clair Augustin Mulholland (1839-1910) (Private collection)

This? Oh it's nothing, it's just my cat bean that knits socks to keep me off my phone and an ugly bird to whom I'm accountable about doing daily chores and self-improvement and things I'm 33 btw

Dr. Jane Goodall filmed an interview with Netflix in March 2025 that she understood would only be released after her death.

Lmao this fan caught a pass from Josh Allen and just ran away with it the play by play is hilarious!

I wish I'd written down all the bits in this book that have made me laugh

Dreamt that I moved to New Zealand and lived in a bungalow

I swear that before when I was feeling tired, but I'd start tidying up or doing something else, the tiredness would abate and I'd get into some type of groove. Now it's like the tiredness is just permanent and I have to tolerate it the whole time I do anything.

Death from above. Photo from my collection, 1959.

Brother Herbert's Big Onion

London and Glasgow pals ⚠️ Fancy coming to see live music from me, my friends Michael and Michael, and Tom from MySpace? Please come along for a nice wee night out and stop me panicking than nobody is going to show.