looking at each other like

I have the Kreskin board game and I’ve never been brave enough to ask anyone to play it with me 😭

The only kind of fury I’m capable of is really just a bongo fury

This is my first gargoyle adjacent garment and I’m enjoying it.

You know I keep that thang on me

this is who runs this account

Sweeter than anything else youtu.be/6rv9yL8LU7E?...

Me, to authority figures constantly

Never mind jobs you had, tell me five classes you took at university: 1. Severe and Unusual Weather 2. History of Action Films 3. Film Noir 4. Folklore and Folklife 5. Intro to Masculinity Studies

damn it’s dead in here, are you all off partying and didn’t invite me?

ok I think I’m officially too high to understand how spreadsheets work

I’m on a Doc Martin binge tonight, and I’m realizing realizing that I’m pretty much like a perfect mixture of Doc and Louisa.

🎵 zone d’erotica, can't you see Thoughts of pretty you and me 🎵

Nixie jumped in bed with me earlier, with a soaking wet mane (from drinking in their water fountain), and then promptly burrowed under this blanket to warm up in a sunbeam.

Free boobs in exchange for all DMs, this offer only applies tonight

Entering my masochistic era (AKA applying for a large US federal grant)

get a sexy ornge man to keep you warm

Nazis ruin everything. When I was in New Zealand, I went to a cool black sand beach and I was having such a great time finding fossils and weird rocks until I noticed the swastika carved into the driftwood. 😑

Time to get high and fly open.spotify.com/track/17saS2...

I AM DRAGGING MY ANCHOR(s) (I have big saggy naturals)

Yesterday, the orange doofus had a swollen inner eyelid and could barely open his eye so I called the vet to get him in. This morning it looks nearly normal?! But it was too late to cancel, so here we are.

Can’t decide what to do about my maladaptive daydreaming problem. On one hand, it keeps me sane and on the other, it gives me unrealistic ideas (like I could leave this country), ugh.

have you hugged your apex predator today?

YESSS Spotify now has the “video view” for the three best songs off POINT OF ENTRY by Judas Priest! It’s hard for me to pick a favorite. Because both “Heading Out to the Highway” and “Don’t Go” both feature positively Looney Tunes looking backdrops. Exhibit A: open.spotify.com/track/4bJSDq...

@niceandinnocent.bsky.social feel like you’d be into this scene

This is how I feel about Tuesday.

People seem to be under the impression that I’m a expert and boy do I have news for them

When I was in New Zealand in November, I was shopping in a supermarket one day, and they played Extreme’s “Hole Hearted”on the sound system, which was weirdly endearing and instantly transported me back to the early 90s.

I’m a cat now

Saxon has a song about a steam train, a song about a plane, a song about the Titanic, and a song about the JFK assassination. I’m calling it, at least one of them was on the spectrum.

I had the worst eggs Benedict of my life this past weekend and I’m still feeling a little sad about it

I sent this song to someone yesterday in response to receiving a photo of some really cool clouds and I’m jus not feeling it was appreciated enough even when I pointed out “you’ve know the hair metal band Nelson? This is their dad.” youtu.be/QvsylXcrQUA?...

Copy and paste the bunny and then put something else in their hand (\_/) (°-°) />💾<

A lot of people are saying this

I don’t know what some of you look like IRL so now I just assume you look like your pfp.

I’m learning there are tons of people out there utterly unconcerned about or unable to create a coherent narrative of their life and choices they have made and that kind of blows my mind

I remember when I moved to the desert that I assumed I wouldn’t get seasonal affective disorder because it stays sunny here even in the winter, and that it’s warm enough to be outside. Lol I was so wrong.

it’s nap-in-sunbeam o’clock over here

I’ve been craving cheese scones since I returned from NZ so I finally got around to making a batch. And this is how I discovered that my baking powder has lost its mojo. :( (they’re still delicious, but they should be puffier!)

NW:

lol did he finally break it

lol this messy bitch

Go this as a sponsored ad and it’s spooky how well the algorithm knows me 😭

Autism and ADHD are stored in the butt 😗👍👍

Not the prettiest cookies I’ve ever made but possibly the tastiest? I browned the butter, and used dark brown sugar dark choco chips and Kona sea salt. Slightly crisp exterior, slightly chewy, slightly underdone. 🤤 I predict they’ll even be good when I don’t have the munchies.

I mean, I know we’re in a lot of wars but how come I never heard about this one??

I had a big greasy burger at Culver’s last night and I was just sitting here thinking how much I’d enjoy having another big greasy burger from Culver’s tonight as well

only the finest heavy metal for me, sir. you know...like van morrison, buffalo springfield, and the eagles

The way this woman spells her name makes my brain physically hurt every time I see it. Like nails on a chalkboard. Like, I know I’m neurodivergent and I’m overly precise with words, and overly tuned into spelling, but this offended me every fiber of my being.

before marijuana after marijuana