@robplotkinwrites.bsky.social
📤 14
đź“Ą 12
đź“ť 58
Follow for more humor (and occasional food writing) at
https://substack.com/@robplotkinwrites/likes
New humor on
@litoldladyhaha.bsky.social
www.littleoldladycomedy.com/all-works/76...
loading . . .
The Votes Have Been Tallied: We've Gutted School Funding, but Construction of the Velociraptor Statue is About to Commence! — Little Old Lady
73 “For” and 29 “Against.” We’re slashing school funding and building the velociraptor statue. I think I speak for the rest of the Board of Selectmen when I say, you’ve made the right decision. For t...
https://www.littleoldladycomedy.com/all-works/76a2ou73jfj1vf2372dszxe7pzc2nk
7 days ago
0
0
0
reposted by
*not based on a true story
add a skeleton here at some point
about 1 month ago
0
0
1
*not based on a true story
add a skeleton here at some point
about 1 month ago
0
0
1
New humor in Slackjaw!
medium.com/slackjaw/if-...
loading . . .
If Finding The Guest Towels While My Wife’s Away On A Business Trip Makes Me A Hero, So Be It
How I finally understood the meaning of “invisible labor”
https://medium.com/slackjaw/if-finding-the-guest-towels-while-my-wifes-away-on-a-business-trip-makes-me-a-hero-so-be-it-25314bc1eaa9?sk=87c368d012c26590e0693b79c4444ed6
about 1 month ago
0
0
1
New piece in Jane Austen's Wastebasket:
medium.com/jane-austens...
loading . . .
We Regret To Inform You That We’re Kicking You Out Of Our Parents Group Chat
It’s not you, it’s the demon that possesses your son
https://medium.com/jane-austens-wastebasket/we-regret-to-inform-you-that-were-kicking-you-out-of-our-parents-group-chat-1032cf153d06?sk=4ad20c10eed5c01a2f8b68ace85f18c6
about 1 month ago
0
1
0
New Humor in Jane Austen's Waatebasket!
medium.com/jane-austens...
loading . . .
What Your Drink Order Says About Your Teaching Career
Please don’t invite the home economics department — I can’t handle Jell-O shots at the holiday party.
https://medium.com/jane-austens-wastebasket/what-your-drink-order-says-about-your-teaching-career-77fc0251caa9?sk=dcb39e9bb46e1e86ed0e2ba72c6de5ca
about 2 months ago
0
0
0
Teachers on Bluesky: I see you!
open.substack.com/pub/funnytea...
loading . . .
What Your Drink Order Says About Your Teaching Career
Please don't invite the home economics department—I can’t handle Jell-O shots at the holiday party.
https://open.substack.com/pub/funnyteacher/p/teacher-drinks?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=wo0pu
about 2 months ago
0
0
0
New humor in FunnyTeacher
open.substack.com/pub/robplotk...
loading . . .
Quiz: Am I Coaching Archery or Potty Training a Two-Year-Old?
Visualize your target
https://open.substack.com/pub/robplotkinwrites/p/quiz-am-i-coaching-archery-or-potty?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=wo0pu
about 2 months ago
0
0
0
reposted by
Frazzled Humor
3 months ago
Dear Susan, It was Clara who told you about Santa and the Easter Bunny, wasn’t it? And laughed as you broke down crying. By
@robplotkinwrites.bsky.social
medium.com/frazzled/san...
loading . . .
Santa and the Easter Bunny Might Just Be Kids’ Stories, but I, the Tooth Fairy, Am As Real as It…
And I think you have something that belongs to me
https://medium.com/frazzled/santa-and-the-easter-bunny-might-just-be-kids-stories-but-i-the-tooth-fairy-am-as-real-as-it-e5f159aa0816
0
1
1
reposted by
Frazzled Humor
3 months ago
Always check to make sure no loved ones or prized possessions stand between you and your target. By
@robplotkinwrites.bsky.social
medium.com/frazzled/qui...
loading . . .
Quiz: Am I Coaching Archery or Potty Training a Two-Year-Old?
I need you to visualize success
https://medium.com/frazzled/quiz-am-i-coaching-archery-or-potty-training-a-two-year-old-32818034bcb6
0
1
1
Read “Choosing A College Major For The 21st Century“ by Rob Plotkin on Medium:
medium.com/slackjaw/cho...
loading . . .
Choosing A College Major For The 21st Century
Let’s just say “literary criticism” is unlikely to be in high demand.
https://medium.com/slackjaw/choosing-a-college-major-for-the-21st-century-1e7cb92cdf34
3 months ago
0
0
0
New work on Slackjaw! “Choosing A College Major For The 21st Century“ by Rob Plotkin:
medium.com/slackjaw/cho...
loading . . .
Choosing A College Major For The 21st Century
Let’s just say “literary criticism” is unlikely to be in high demand.
https://medium.com/slackjaw/choosing-a-college-major-for-the-21st-century-1e7cb92cdf34
3 months ago
0
0
0
reposted by
Points in Case
3 months ago
I’ve developed a ranking system reducing their performance into a simple number: Progeny Plus-Minus (PPM).
loading . . .
As a Mother of Three Who Loves All of Her Children Equally, I’m Excited to Unveil My Updated Power Rankings
I’ve developed a ranking system reducing their performance into a simple number: Progeny Plus-Minus (PPM).
https://www.pointsincase.com/articles/as-a-mother-of-three-who-loves-all-of-her-children-equally-im-excited-to-unveil-my-updated-power-rankings
0
1
1
New post in
@pointsincase.com
3 months ago
0
1
1
Read “The NBA’s Plan To Put Snake Pits Along The Three-Point Line Is Highly Problematic“ by Rob Plotkin on Medium:
medium.com/slackjaw/the...
loading . . .
The NBA’s Plan To Put Snake Pits Along The Three-Point Line Is Highly Problematic
An editorial
https://medium.com/slackjaw/the-nbas-plan-to-put-snake-pits-along-the-three-point-line-is-highly-problematic-39542be9983a?sk=486808f488c4e31eb3144248e58ee682
4 months ago
0
0
0
The in season tournament is one thing... “The NBA’s Plan To Put Snake Pits Along The Three-Point Line Is Highly Problematic“ by Rob Plotkin on Medium:
medium.com/slackjaw/the...
loading . . .
The NBA’s Plan To Put Snake Pits Along The Three-Point Line Is Highly Problematic
An editorial
https://medium.com/slackjaw/the-nbas-plan-to-put-snake-pits-along-the-three-point-line-is-highly-problematic-39542be9983a?sk=486808f488c4e31eb3144248e58ee682
4 months ago
0
0
1
The real awards ceremony from last night:
open.substack.com/pub/funnytea...
loading . . .
The 2026 All-American High School Teaching Awards
And the award goes to...
https://open.substack.com/pub/funnyteacher/p/the-2026-all-american-high-school?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=wo0pu
4 months ago
0
0
0
I want to thank the big guy and my mom...
muddyum.net/i-cant-belie...
loading . . .
https://muddyum.net/i-cant-believe-i-won-substitute-teacher-of-the-year-28c0eb4f1d3d?sk=ba25e45b0776fda5621e42c1e5775647
4 months ago
0
0
0
reposted by
Teachers, let's abolish the lesson plan! (Kind of).
add a skeleton here at some point
5 months ago
0
0
1
reposted by
In a change of pace, check out my travel piece on Greenland:
medium.com/travel-memoi...
loading . . .
Travelling Without an Itinerary in Greenland
Two weeks in Disko Bay
https://medium.com/travel-memoirs/travelling-without-an-itinerary-in-greenland-8f7a22b42b08?sk=b710c28d60358697e3d64080354ea272
4 months ago
0
0
1
In a change of pace, check out my travel piece on Greenland:
medium.com/travel-memoi...
loading . . .
Travelling Without an Itinerary in Greenland
Two weeks in Disko Bay
https://medium.com/travel-memoirs/travelling-without-an-itinerary-in-greenland-8f7a22b42b08?sk=b710c28d60358697e3d64080354ea272
4 months ago
0
0
1
Teachers, let's abolish the lesson plan! (Kind of).
add a skeleton here at some point
5 months ago
0
0
1
Thoughts on "the lesson." I can be serious from time to time:
medium.com/age-of-aware...
loading . . .
The Perfect Lesson, and Why it Doesn’t Exist
And why it doesn’t need to
https://medium.com/age-of-awareness/the-perfect-lesson-and-why-it-doesnt-exist-ac599cd1e8ff?sk=8edd81d8a330ecb92d98b49cbd86bfa9
5 months ago
0
0
1
I wouldn't miss your wedding for anything in the world, as long as it doesn't clash with mushroom season. New humor in Jane Austen's Wastebasket
medium.com/me/stats/pos...
loading . . .
Medium
https://medium.com/me/stats/post/c087c852eec3
5 months ago
0
0
0
I'll say it. sleeptraining/not sleeptraining your baby is essentially child abuse:
medium.com/frazzled/fiv...
loading . . .
Five Reasons Why You Should(n’t) Sleep Train Your Baby
Hint: All decisions lead to permanent trauma
https://medium.com/frazzled/five-reasons-why-you-should-nt-sleep-train-your-baby-3c27da1cc070
5 months ago
0
0
0
I'm not a doctor, but
add a skeleton here at some point
5 months ago
0
1
1
Let's face it, a school reunion can be brutal for anyone who made unconventional life choices. Humor on FunnyTeacher.
open.substack.com/pub/robplotk...
loading . . .
As an Aspiring Warlord, I Find These High School Reunions So Awkward
Not everyone dreams of a house, a family, a car, and a mortgage
https://open.substack.com/pub/robplotkinwrites/p/as-an-aspiring-warlord-i-find-these?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=wo0pu
5 months ago
0
0
0
Be honest, how many laptops are in your closet right now? New work in Slackjaw
medium.com/slackjaw/im-...
loading . . .
I’m The 2008 Macbook That’s Been In The Back Of Your Closet Since 2014, And I Can’t Live Like This…
It’s time to pull the plug
https://medium.com/slackjaw/im-the-2008-macbook-that-s-been-in-the-back-of-your-closet-since-2014-and-i-can-t-live-like-this-f7d5bf23e7ab?sk=57f682ee24440297ca1171e7eedbe8e5
5 months ago
0
0
0
Read “At IKEA, We Sincerely Apologize For the Damage We Have Done to the Institution of Marriage“ by Rob Plotkin on Medium:
medium.com/jane-austens...
5 months ago
0
0
0
The top reasons to get your kid a fake ID New humor in Funny Teacher. Originally published in
@frazzledhumor.bsky.social
)
open.substack.com/pub/funnytea...
loading . . .
Why I Got My Five-Year-Old Son A Fake ID
I'll give you a hint: No one's around in August
https://open.substack.com/pub/funnyteacher/p/why-i-got-my-five-year-old-son-a?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=wo0pu
5 months ago
0
1
0
New humor on Funny Teacher. All the reasons to travel while you're still young. First published in
@litoldladyhaha.bsky.social
open.substack.com/pub/funnytea...
loading . . .
Life After Graduation: Why I Travel, and Why You Should Too
A testimonial from a GHRHS graduate
https://open.substack.com/pub/funnyteacher/p/life-after-graduation-why-i-travel?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=wo0pu
6 months ago
0
0
0
reposted by
Reading recommendations:
open.substack.com/pub/robplotk...
loading . . .
Five Reading Recommendations 01/23/2026
4 Humor Pieces and 1 Wildcard
https://open.substack.com/pub/robplotkinwrites/p/five-reading-recommendations-01232026?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=wo0pu
6 months ago
0
0
1
Reading recommendations:
open.substack.com/pub/robplotk...
loading . . .
Five Reading Recommendations 01/23/2026
4 Humor Pieces and 1 Wildcard
https://open.substack.com/pub/robplotkinwrites/p/five-reading-recommendations-01232026?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=wo0pu
6 months ago
0
0
1
Follow my newsletter for more teaching and academic tinged humor
open.substack.com/pub/funnytea...
loading . . .
You Can All Stop Worrying about AI. I Wrote a Policy Document
I think this will clarify things
https://open.substack.com/pub/funnyteacher/p/you-can-all-stop-worrying-about-ai?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=wo0pu
6 months ago
0
0
0
add a skeleton here at some point
6 months ago
1
0
0
New Humor, published in Jane Austen's Wastebasket! I just published I’m the Boogeyman in Your Son’s Room, and We Need to Renegotiate My Lease
medium.com/jane-austens...
loading . . .
I’m the Boogeyman in Your Son’s Room, and We Need to Renegotiate My Lease
This just isn’t what I signed up for
https://medium.com/jane-austens-wastebasket/im-the-boogeyman-in-your-son-s-closet-and-we-need-to-renegotiate-my-lease-51519786babc?source=social.bluesky
6 months ago
0
0
1
add a skeleton here at some point
6 months ago
0
0
0
add a skeleton here at some point
6 months ago
0
0
0
reposted by
Points in Case
6 months ago
10th-grade math teacher: Once a year, on your birthday, you drink a full pint of vodka, walk into your closet, and scream.
loading . . .
What Your Drink Order Says About Your Teaching Career
10th-grade math teacher: Once a year, on your birthday, you drink a full pint of vodka, walk into your closet, and scream.
https://www.pointsincase.com/articles/what-your-drink-order-says-about-your-teaching-career
0
1
1
New humor in
@pointsincase.com
What does a teacher's drink order say about their career?
www.pointsincase.com/articles/wha...
loading . . .
What Your Drink Order Says About Your Teaching Career
10th-grade math teacher: Once a year, on your birthday, you drink a full pint of vodka, walk into your closet, and scream.
https://www.pointsincase.com/articles/what-your-drink-order-says-about-your-teaching-career
6 months ago
0
2
2
Work in Slackjaw! Dedicated to anyone who's ever dreamed of taking to the mountains ...
medium.com/slackjaw/as-...
loading . . .
As An Aspiring Warlord, I Find These High School Reunions So Awkward
Not everyone dreams of a house, a family, a car, and a mortgage
https://medium.com/slackjaw/as-an-aspiring-warlord-i-find-these-high-school-reunions-so-awkward-08b064b341b7
6 months ago
0
0
0
The one food to rule them all...
medium.com/rooted-publi...
loading . . .
My Love Affair With Uyghur Cuisine
A cuisine at the crossroads
https://medium.com/rooted-publication/my-love-affair-with-uyghur-cuisine-46a45db8879b
6 months ago
0
0
0
What's the right way to handle show and tell ?
open.substack.com/pub/funnytea...
loading . . .
Six Simple Moves to Dominate Show and Tell
How to win friends, gain influence, and rise to power in your second-grade class
https://open.substack.com/pub/funnyteacher/p/six-simple-moves-to-dominate-show?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=wo0pu
6 months ago
0
0
0
Enjoy my humor writing? Ever been a teacher? A student? Follow my FREE newsletter for one piece of humor writing each Monday, adjacent to the world of edication.
open.substack.com/pub/funnytea...
loading . . .
Welcome to Funny Teacher
A newsletter for anyone who's ever found the humor in school
https://open.substack.com/pub/funnyteacher/p/welcome-to-funny-teacher?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=wo0pu
7 months ago
0
1
0
My reflections as my first year of writing humor comes to a close. @Medium
#mediumabridged
medium.com/@robplotkinw...
loading . . .
On Learning to Write Humor
Everything I’ve learned (not much), what I want to learn, and the year ahead
https://medium.com/@robplotkinwrites/on-learning-to-write-humor-878d2edb4a38
7 months ago
0
0
0
My writing goals for 2026. But first I need to recruit a bot army. Can someone direct me to Bluesky grok who might be able to help me with this ?
medium.com/another-fuck...
loading . . .
My Writing Goals for 2026: Grow Grow Grow
Hiring: An army of Medium bots
https://medium.com/another-fucking-publication/my-writing-goals-for-2026-grow-grow-grow-cbe1f2fab077
7 months ago
0
0
0
My much belated Christmas essay, that asks a very reasonable question: what would I, a 2 year old, like for Christmas?
7 months ago
0
0
0
reposted by
Frazzled Humor
7 months ago
Remember last Christmas when I told you there was no Santa, and that me and your dad were the ones giving you presents? I lied. By
@robplotkinwrites.bsky.social
medium.com/frazzled/i-k...
loading . . .
I Know I Told You Santa Wasn’t Real, but I Take It All Back
It’s not just your dad in a suit
https://medium.com/frazzled/i-know-i-told-you-santa-wasnt-real-but-i-take-it-all-back-d6cb700e3646?sk=a1df31e63f99a95ac7bbca6344343005
0
2
1
My (hopefully not-too-navel-gazey) piece on what I learned in writing humor and fiction this year. + a list of my favorite publications on Medium, including
@frazzledhumor.bsky.social
, Rooted, Sharing Food, and Jane Austen's Wastebasket.
medium.com/@robplotkinw...
loading . . .
My Year in Writing
Finding my writer identity and negotiating genre
https://medium.com/@robplotkinwrites/my-year-in-writing-71884a97f316
7 months ago
0
1
1
reposted by
Frazzled Humor
7 months ago
Dear Santa, I’m pleased to finally have the opportunity to create my own Christmas wish list. This is my first Christmas after all. By
@robplotkinwrites.bsky.social
medium.com/frazzled/as-...
loading . . .
As a Two-Year-Old, I Expect to Receive Every Item on My Christmas Wish-List
It’s not too much to ask
https://medium.com/frazzled/as-a-two-year-old-i-expect-to-receive-every-item-on-my-christmas-wish-list-66300878003b?sk=deb8c9f97d52dce8e706986fe77dbb6c
0
2
1
Load more
feeds!
log in
