JD Vance addresses rumors about Trump and Bill Clinton. #bubba

15-year-old girls need to start saying racist stuff on a text thread so Republicans finally see them as “just kids.”

Had a great time with @mattkoff.bsky.social on this week’s podcast! Check out My New Thing!

What the GOP sounds like when discussing Epstein. @danwilbur.bsky.social

JD Vance reacts to the release of the Epstein Emails.

Fun idea for a standup show: everyone gets to go on early so they can get to another spot. We all show up late. Show’s 14 minutes long.

JD Vance responds to Josh Shapiro about turning his back on Appalachia.

JD Vance responds to Josh Shapiro about turning his back on Appalachia.

Found the tweet that Joyce Carol Oates bodied Elon Musk with and it's so beautiful in its eloquent, simple take down. So much so he's crashing out trying to prove he reads books now. Put this in the Louvre.

The government shutdown was painful for many people but at least we all got… we got the… there was talk about healthcare… and when the Republicans want to take more stuff… uh… they can?

Democrats: we will not budge on our ask for you to extend the ACA subsidies. Republicans: No. Democrats: OK, whatever works!

Ordered a Switch 2 on Temu and they sent a PalmPilot with Mario stickers on it??

I studied Ancient Greek in college and I sometimes think I should be writing “smarter” comedy but then I remember that dressing like a giant cock and humping the stool is exactly what Aristophanes would want.

We had the great @arielcomedy.bsky.social on today’s podcast to talk about Welcome To Plathville and that time someone threw a beer at her while she was performing. Listen here: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/m... @zachsims.bsky.social

We had the great @arielcomedy.bsky.social on today’s podcast to talk about Welcome To Plathville and that time someone threw a beer at her while she was performing. Listen here: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/m... @zachsims.bsky.social

Just because it rhymes doesn’t mean it’s good life advice! “I’m rubber, you’re glue. Suck me off at the Brooklyn Zoo”??

JD Vance explains why cancelling flights and not paying air traffic controllers during the shutdown is a good thing.

JD Vance reacts to Zohran Mamdani becoming the next mayor of NYC.

In the criminal justice system, the people are represented by two separate, yet equally important, groups: the police who investigate crime and the federal agents who commit them.

How can conservatives claim Democrats are all weird uggos when we’re the party of AOC, Mamdani, and Jerry Nadler?

Big Stretch is back in Huntington, NY on Tuesday, 11/18! Featuring: JL Cauvin (Showtime’s Billions, Late Late Show) Ariel Elias (Jimmy Kimmel Live) Harry Freedman (Everybody Loves Raymond) Dennis Rooney (Don’t Tell) m.bpt.me/event/674462...

It’s not too late to enjoy this week’s spooky episode of My New Thing! We talk about the new book of scary stories written by The Boo Boys! podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/m... @zachsims.bsky.social @zachbroussard.bsky.social

ICYMI

JD Vance addresses rumors that he’s sleeping with Erika Kirk.

JD Vance addresses rumors that he’s sleeping with Erika Kirk.

*panicking at the sound of the doorbell* “Uhh. Uhh. Do you kids like off brand decaf k-cups??”

Carrying around a folding chair that says “CUCK” on it and whenever anyone at the Halloween party asks what I’m supposed to be, I sit down and say “an ICE Agent!”

Love is Blind should be called Say Yes Under Duress

JD Vance is right. The real victims of the 9/11 backlash were the 600,000 dead Iraqi civilians who had nothing to do with it. Thank you for pointing this out!

Comedy isn’t the problem, man. It’s society as a whole that’s the problem and that’s why I’m not going to do anything to help fix that either.

I’ll see you in Hell! (complimentary)

Spring-summer: “I got something until 4:00. Can I meet you at 4:05 right outside the building?” Fall-winter: “I can’t hang out this week because I need to go to the pharmacy on Thursday and I’m going to need some down time around that.”

Every Facebook post now: “Heard someone say the ballroom needs to be 90k square feet so Trump’s balls can fit in there!! Hah! 🤣🤣 The Mamdani family invented the measles #MAGA”

We had a great time talking to @thecaitlinreese.bsky.social about vegetarianism and animal rights on this week’s podcast! Check it out: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/m... @zachsims.bsky.social

Don’t talk to me until I’ve had my morning weeping and gnashing of teeth

Halloween edition of Incorrect Film Quotes

Free Stand-up comedy show in Brooklyn tonight! Wednesday, October 22nd at 7:30 PM includes Jenny Tian (Chinese Australian YouTube special) Claudia Cogan (NBC’s Last Comic Standing) Pedro Salinas (HBO) Nick Ciaccia (What’s the Worst That Could Happen Comedy) www.eventbrite.com/e/we-have-fu...

My friend got a tattoo and said she was worried it might look stupid when she gets older, but I assured her that it looks stupid now.

“Who gives a shit?” - @jd-vance-1.bsky.social

JD Vance does the ice bucket challenge to raise money for ICE agents.

The Schumer Shutdown means the military and wannabe military isn’t getting funded. So @jd-vance-1.bsky.social is doing the ICE Bucket Challenge.

JD Vance does the ice bucket challenge to raise money for ICE agents.

Had a blast talking to Peter Grosz (Veep, NPR’s Wait, Wait…) this week about his love of watching videos of restaurants preparing to serve food to patrons. We also talked about what it was like to film The Menu! podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/m... @zachsims.bsky.social

We need the National Guard to come to NYC and help the police look at their phones in the subway

“Must be the weather that’s bumming me out.” he said and he unwrapped his 6th Reese’s cup

BOTH sides need to tone down the rhetoric! You can’t call Obama a Nazi for trying to give people health care and then expect people not to call you a Nazi when you do a bunch of stuff the Nazis did.

JD Vance spends the government shutdown shopping for couches. @jd-vance-1.bsky.social

JD Vance spends the government shutdown shopping for couches. @jd-vance-1.bsky.social

Who's this 'With' character, and why are they always holding my father's approval?