I’m trying to weigh myself less frequently so I don’t stress out at day to day differences (I didn’t follow it today and it said I’m up 4 lbs and I want to die, all over a single serving of French fries - I hate sodium fluctuations)

Halfway thru today’s workout and I swear tea is the only thing keeping me going. 30/60

So just updating bc why not. Found out my back pain is bc I have a spinal abnormality (tldr my L5 and S1 one have a natural fusion so everything above and below is overworking) and my pain has gotten significantly worse since. It’s bad enough that it hurts to chew so I’ve been on soft foods for

I forgot blue sky existed but I’m alive

Sick bc of my period, I’m going to try to up my intake so I don’t keep having to worry about passing out.

Today’s body checks no waist trainer and yes I need to clean my mirror.

Early morning workout

So my family did Christmas today and my mother bought me an insane amount of candy. It’s really funny how her envy comes out by trying to trigger me to binge.

Fell off on working out, shooting for 30 minutes everyday for a week, then I’ll double it. 2/7

Mmmm have been doing that thing where I shut down 100% socially and lock tf in, I’m alive tho

I don’t know what happened this week but I snapped and I know how to get back in the mindset I was before, I don’t like who I am when I’m like that. I’ve given up everything to be skinny so far, what’s one more facet of myself?

good afternoon edsky

I don’t know how people function with physical jobs being sober.

Honestly making content where my body is recorded is one of the biggest motivators to keep losing weight, I hate the way I look on camera.

Am I using substances to make myself sick to get back on track? Yes, yes I am.

Need to lock in. Need to lock in. Need to lock in. Need to lock in. Need to lock in. Need to lock in.

No energy and so much to do and can’t seem to push myself to start

Everytime I eat out even if it’s low cal I feel like a failure who just wasted money

Did my hour workout today now that my tattoo is healed enough to take the saniderm off. God I missed working out.

It’s always funny when my mom’s friends kid comes over and thinks he understands the world so well (he’s like 18) and tells me his philosophy on life and how black and white it is. While I don’t argue since idc about his beliefs, I do ask him what makes him believe he’s an authority on how others

I’m sharing these tips and things based off what people have told me that make me come off as “aggressive” or “intimidating”. If they can help even one other afab person feel more confident/protect them then I’m happy to share them!!

Afab ppl tips: get prominent tattoos, esp face tattoos, big prominent face tattoos. I have two of them myself, since getting them men have been less mouthy with me or because they don’t find me attractive they’re upfront about what they’re seeking.

More afab tips: If you can’t get your hands on pepper spray for whatever reason or want a sneakier way to carry it, carry alcohol based perfume to spray in an attackers eyes. They’re more likely to get an infection and it won’t draw attention to you. Plus it’ll be easier to identify the attacker.

Men who come into my work and try to mansplain smoking products to me are a joke, you didn’t listen to what I said about not having a specific cones, I offer an papers+tips you said yes ,then got upset it wasn’t cones . Mother fucker you’re buying cones at 7am, you should check yourself.

Without downloading new pics, where are you mentally?

Periods + physical jobs suck so hard

Can I just say mukbangs make me uncomfortable and it’s not because of the noises or anything like that. So many “messy” mukbangs are tailored to appeal to feeders or sometimes are funded by them. So they’re basically fetish content, and they’re allowed on TikTok where minors can find it?

Break time, I’m ready to melt ngl

I feel so bloated I don’t want to go to work tbh, but I like money more than I hate myself.

Also if you’re an afab person with long hair and concerned about someone grabbing it when you’re out, you can braid razor blades in your hair without them being visible w enough practice, just saying.

I love it when people want to comment on my personal habits without realizing that gives me permission to comment on those someone referred to me as a “busy body” because I’m always working (yk not at all what it means) and it took everything I had to say “well maybe you’re just lazy”

Tfw all you want is junk so your lunch becomes two servings of chips.

@homicidalkgs.bsky.social can you turn ur messages on?? I had something to send you if that’s ok !!

Haven’t been able to work out the last few days bc I’m healing two tattoos but they look AMAZING SO WORTH IT

I’ll always maintain that non disordered individual’s opinions on my body will never hit the same as feedback from disordered individuals. I don’t know if that’s weird but when you understand what it’s like to struggle with this stuff it’s like, okay omg you get the hell this is

november will be my month november will be my month november will be my month november will be my month november will be my month november will be my month november will be my month november will be my month november will be my month november will be my month november will be my month november will-

Morning workout: 60 mins / 420 calories burned Breakfast: 2 cups of coffee / protein shake / 170 cals

Finished my workout and showered, Dannon light and fit with water, collagen peptides, and benefiber. Might also add a couple cups of coffee with a protein shake since my weekend job involves being on my feet.

Woke up at 2:30 am instead of 3am to make time to workout and shower before I leave for work at 5am. I feel so gross and don’t want to reek at work but I need a morning workout.

Btw if any of my moots wants to follow me on twt just message me for my @ my account is private and I talk more freely there and I post my bc’s there and stuff

Even if I don’t finish this I should probably only have a protein shake for dinner and try to shoot for another hour of exercise tbh

Finished an hour morning workout and having some veggies and veggie pasta for lunch.

Still sobering up but at least it’s easier to restrict.

I swear to god my cat George is the only one who can match my freak (I pretend to be dead to be ott and he bites me to call my bluff)