Whenever a new coffee shop opens round here I always wait a few weeks before I go in cos I don't want them to think I'm too keen

"Andy Burnham" sounds like a 17th Century Bristolian describing the actions of a witch finder

Her tweet, of course, is a complete lie. I reckon I know rather more of the “movement” than she ever will, and just, no. If you drink from a deluge of rightwing quackery, you will become a rightwing quack. That any newspaper takes her seriously is a testament only to her money.

Crikey those Argentinian players are a bunch of dickheads, aren't they

"Andy Burnham" sounds like a 17th Century Bristolian describing the actions of a witch finder

Andy Burnham unveils his Minister for AI

It's always the person you most suspect, isn't it

On that note, I've just bought an album by a guy that wrote, performed, recorded & mixed everything himself on old 4 and 8 track tape machines. It's janky, pitchy and out of time, but it's so interesting and fun. The mistakes and limitations are part of what makes it special.

I've seen so many fan films by people who can't write, act, direct, do special FX etc but made by people who clearly love what they're doing. But now people are posting AI generated "epic incredible adventures" on YouTube and literally who gives a fuck

I would rather watch, read or listen to something rubbish made by a passionate human who cares about their project than something "perfect" generated by AI. I don't understand why people don't all think like that.

Well. Watching the game later on iPlayer has been ruined for me now, thank you very much #ENGARG

Is it really a coincidence that this happens after Starmer's last ever PMQs? Open your eyes, people! #ENGARG

There's someone very nearby literally going "ARRRGH! AAAAAAAAAAHHHH!! AAAARGHHHAAAAA!!" at the top of his voice. So if you're planning on murdering anyone now would be a good time to get away with it

I knew Argentina had equalised because of the needlessly terrifying man shouts that just erupted through the night air

Honestly I just hope all the players are having a nice time with their friends #ENGARG

My t-shirt is haunted by an incredibly sweaty ghost

The fact that J.K. Rowling successfully bullied Amnesty International into taking down a report that accurately called out her attack on trans people, especially trans women, is so repulsive and such a display of the power of her money, and her choice to put her vast fortune behind persecution.

Had a wonderful time at the Lifehouse acoustic gig at Bush Hall in London yesterday. The guys were so lovely and it was genuinely the best concert I've ever been to.

Every time I wear clothes I think I look nice in, the pictures people take VERY quickly disprove that theory

Got to the venue super early - cos I'm me - so I've stopped at a pub for a pint. The perfect drink for today. But 8 quid?! Bloody London

Our poor little cat Jack has been suffering for weeks. He gets really bad idiopathic cystitis. We've taken him to the vets several times - he's emptying his bladder, he's had his anal glands checked, we're doing EVERYTHING you're supposed to do, but he's just constantly in & out of litter boxes...

I'm off to London tomorrow to see Lifehouse, my favourite band, do a tiny intimate acoustic gig. 100 seats, amazing. But I have to go by myself cos Ally can't go anymore and I'm bloody terrified.

I was just in the toilet, which is a great start to any anecdote. And these lads were just in there and I heard them saying "oh for fucks sake, these signs were made from fucking waste materials? Fucking wokerati out in force! Fucking tossers!" ... What the ever loving hell are you talking about

The other parties collectively deciding not to indulge Farage has very strong "ignore him, he'll tire himself out" energy

The fact Count Binface could actually win and that would be the best outcome sums up how ridiculous the universe is at the moment, doesn't it

Count Binface Vs Cunt Binfire

I swear the damn things follow me. I'm at Bletchley Park. And yet... Cybermen

And yes, I know it's a cypher, not a code. Don't yell at me.

I'm at Bletchley Park. I'll tell you what's weird - using the toilet in the same building where they broke the enigma code.

Watched Ready or Not 2. Preferred the first one. This one was ok but it was too big.

I just hope the England and Mexico teams both have a nice time.

Little Jack is still having a horrible time with his cystitis. I think he's feeling quite needy. (Fun fact: he was on my throat and I couldn't breathe)

Two weeks ago I released my first ever music video. Every frame was made by me in Blender, and I wrote, performed, recorded and mixed the entire song myself. If you enjoy it, please give it a watch and share it. It'd mean the world to me. youtu.be/5hZJERKIvN4?...

Well, there goes my plan to marry Taylor Swift. I swear I was gonna ask any day now. Sigh. Snooze ya lose, you know.

Two weeks ago I released my first ever music video. Every frame was made by me in Blender, and I wrote, performed, recorded and mixed the entire song myself. If you enjoy it, please give it a watch and share it. It'd mean the world to me. youtu.be/5hZJERKIvN4?...

Any time someone tells me "you HAVE to see...." I can basically guarantee that I'll instantly hate it

"Pride has succeeded" I say as my country attempts to implement a nationwide trans bathroom ban

People post "Wow! AI is the future of film making! Soon every movie will be made to this outstanding level of brilliance that no human could ever create!" and then it's just a slow motion video of The Hulk and Batman fighting on a beach.

All singer/songwriters these days are either trying to be Taylor Swift, Phoebe Bridgers, Ed Sheeran or John Mayer. As someone who's trying to rip off John Mayer I'm finding this very annoying.

Well who would have thought in a million years...

Without downloading any new images, sum up your mental state in one picture

metro.co.uk/2026/06/26/r... he's absolutely faked his death.

Hope everyone is as completely fine as I am in this heat.

I have no idea if this is satire but I have a horrible feeling it's not

I'm just playing around with new music making software. It's designed to emulate how a tape recorder works. The problem/great thing with modern audio software is you can edit and tweak and edit and edit some more and tweak and change and add a billion tracks.

I've basically guilted my boss into letting me have today and tomorrow off as holiday, whilst my incredibly pregnant colleague still has to come in and work in a room with 0 air conditioning.

Our local facebook group is literally just: Person 1: It's too hot, and in fact deeply cruel, to take your dog for a walk in this heat. Here's a big list of facts. Person 2, 3, 4 etc: HOW DARE YOU TELL ME WHAT TO DO, SNOWFLAKE! WHAT DO DOGS THAT LIVE ON THE SUN DO? WE USED TO BE A REAL COUNTRY....

I don't know if anyone else has noticed, but it's r8 fookin 'ot today, ent it

I've released my new single and FIRST EVER MUSIC VIDEO!! Which is spectacularly exciting and scary. I modelled and animated the whole thing in Blender and wrote, performed, recorded and mixed the song, all in my little home office. Check it out, I'm really proud of it youtu.be/5hZJERKIvN4?...

Our little Jack is on day 4 of his idiopathic cystitis. He seems so miserable and in pain. He's been getting it on and off for years but it's always horrible.