i have two therapists, one for each style of complaint

all im saying is nobody has ever seen david cronenberg and sam the eagle in the same place at the same time

the people who run websites are always so fucking stupid

calvaire is so good. we love calvaire, dont we folks

why wont paul mccartney die already

a sequel to yesterday about an alternate universe in which the movie yesterday was never made so the idea of the beatles not existing does not exist

i should go to ponyoke sometime soon

if he dies, he dies

working on a résumé for a stationery shop that is not hiring so i am exaggerating some of my skills, e.g., “i know more about pens than any human on the west coast,” “i can use my mind to force people to purchase stamps,” and so on

going back in time to assassinate ada lovelace so computers never come into existence

i like foreign films because glen powell isnt in them :)

ever since i saw that video of the guy riding his bicycle past his neighbors’ dogs and BTFOing them with bear mace my mind has not been the same

thats judith fucking light to you

its gonna be so funny on here when william shatner dies

ready or not 2 was both a delightful horror sequel and a somber meditation on the twin insurgency

roberto benigni should have been thrown down a well at birth

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i personally hate living in the dennis hastert extended universe

i love to downvote comments in r/teachers

i for one think larry david was right to actually kill that swan and kind of kill norm

the scene at the start of project hail mary with ryan gosling in the transparent rubber suit with white briefs underneath is going to be such a popular topic of discussion in government-mandated conversion therapy sessions twenty years from now

“who saw the tv glow”/“we saw the tv glow” is everybody’s favorite pep rally chant at the transgender high school

this information matters to nobody but myself but i am writing a little bit again

“rest in power, chuck norris” is an astonishing bit

its true that there is no left-liberal solidarity

i keep thinking about all the good that the 83 billion that meta wasted on their vr horseshit could have done if we lived in a fundamentally different world

there were so many movies from 2025 that deserved zero oscars and won exactly that many oscars. i cant be mad about that

"No to war... and free Palestine" Javier Bardem

you just know that maya rudolph is getting laid tonight

fiona dourif went to the emilia clarke school of forehead acting

the big bang theory featured a representation of autism so vile it caused some sick individuals to tolerate elon musk

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it continues to kick ass how unbelievably fucking annoying 10% of bluesky users are

the subtext of all modern advertising is wanting gwen stefani to suffer

it would be cool if the secretary of defense were gina gershon instead of pete hegseth

do you ever think about the ending of a widow for one year and cry a little bit in the bathroom while pooping

i like abortion and homosexuality more than i like any function of the united states government. which is probably why i decided to become a gender doctor if i am keeping it 100

remember that it could happen any day now

cf the filmography of parker posey

i really hate republicans, evangelicals, etc. they are all such terrible people

theres this old sitcom i used to watch as a kid but i cant remember what its called for the life of me. so it is about a family of dinosaurs,

showing erin psycho goreman and she likes it so far

bigotry is what conservatives have instead of a clitoris

took an edible and am now about to see the revenant in imax. i hope it is somehow good despite being an iñárittu movie

moby dick is a beautiful story about never giving up on your goals

I drew the three stooges for my friend

if you are transgender and you save a baby from icy oblivion i guess it is okay to be a comedian

an ai-generated death doula that sometimes selects the wrong person to guide into the afterlife but it happens less than 10% of the time so the company that runs the program doesnt find it cost-effective to fix it

i told erin about the rohrwacher announcement but she has yet to get back to me so lets just hold the excitement for roughly 25-35 minutes okay

there is nothing in the entire world more embarrassing than thinking that something could be your star wars and not immediately binning the entire fucking thing with maximum prejudice