Listen, I don't eat hotdogs more than maybe two times a year, but aint no way I'm taking the latter if my two choices are between "cancer" or "made from marinating carrots..." gizmodo.com/americans-ar...

I need to go grocery shopping after work, but I’m so exhausted from the long weekend in SF that maybe I’ll just go to bed?

“Thanks for the reminder that you are such a good kisser! And your bulge poking out of your shorts made my hole tingle…” People are just too sweet 🥰

Dude’s name on Scruff is “FantasBeast” and it’s not a soda reference. He says that he “was” a fan and “it’s complicated”. Too bad Scruff doesn’t let people change their display names. He could avoid some very awkward conversations.

Ooooh I wonder if my dr would prescribe this to me for my sensitive nose...

Adam and the Metal Hawks is like if Guns and Roses crossed with AC/DC and Tenacious D (if they were good).

You know, I love Tom Morello, but sometimes I really need him to call the fuck down with these squeaky high notes. #RATM

A few times I’ve been around that track so it’s not just gonna happen like that

I’ve been in a kinky book club before, but I’ve never heard of kinky bookkeeping before.

My brain, 24/7:

Are all interns like this???

Take Dennis’s voice out and this could be in a Banjo Kazooie game… youtu.be/yoFgccoxt3k?...

De-le-le-wooooooooooooop!

It's quite lovely to wake up to 15 photos of a hot fuzzy friend who I had a huge crush on back when I lived in SF... maybe he will let me touch his butt this weekend...

If you see me driving in PDX shirtless, no you didn’t

A Subaru Baja, no less!

Had someone come tell me his computer wouldn’t turn on because “the power button is stuck”. Sir, that is the SIM card slot.

Anyone with #PokemonTCGP want to trade me a shiny Gengar for shiny Manectric? I swear I have gotten 9 special Manectric cards, 3 special Slowbros, and 0 Gengar. I’m buying 1 Gengar with points but need the 2nd for my deck!

My desk is between two kitchens and someone just heated up their lunch, which smells a lot like cat piss. Is it Pho? Probably!

How the fuck do people wear long pants and sweatshirts on 90°F days? I could be naked and it still wouldn’t be enough. 🥵

You guys laughed when he used me to draw a dotted line around Alabama. I have no idea WTF is going on here.

You know when a song is played over and over for years and it gets real old real fuckin fast? One-Winged Angel.

Gay, and going out of town for Pride so you know what that means! Mohawk time!

Jim West, desperado, rough rider, no you don't want nada, none of this, six-gunnin this, brother runnin this, buffalo soldier, look it's like I told ya… 🤠

oooooh

DOG OOD. 🐶👾

Deviantart or IRC (mIRC, specifically)

"H/T Christian Cole" lmao

Main reason I want to upgrade my iPhone soon. I need more OSes with this feature for automation pls. If Windows had this.... ooh baby. "Enable fingerprint reader on login screen immediately when computer wakes from sleep" would probably be the first thing I set up. www.macrumors.com/2026/06/08/a...

From what I can tell after searching the entire last 10 years of the internet for an hour, is that there is ZERO way to enable the on-screen keyboard when clicking a text field with a mouse and no keyboard attached, but PLENTY of people who want this feature.

WRONG THERE IS NO SETTING FOR THIS. The only way to enable to the on-screen keyboard when there is no keyboard attached is with a fucking KEYBOARD SHORTCUT. What the actual fuck #Microsoft

omfg holy shit Reddit ppl

Wow, #Windows11 has to be the most advanced operating system I've ever used. Like, when I use my laptop in tablet mode (no keyboard) and click with my mouse at the log in screen, it doesn't show me a keyboard to type my PIN or password until I click with my finger! So smart. Makes perfect sense!

Being forced to use Apple (iTunes) for mp3s is truly the worst considering there are zero good music alternatives on iOS. I just use it for the smart playlists! Ugh.

If I have copied 600 songs from #iTunes to my iPhone in 15 minutes, then how long will it take to copy 17,113 songs? Hmmm about 7-8 hours maybe?

Getting older sucks. I had to get up at 6:30am to pee and now I am wide awake. I wanted to sleep in!! I was hoping for at least 3 more hours ffs!

*big stretch*

Ugh I have to leave the house to get groceries.

Do I want to go to sleep, or put stuff up my butt? Sleep. Yes. Pillows. Zzz. Tomorrow, maybe (I say every day).

My teeth hurt and I'm out of Rum and it's the worst cinco de mayo ever.

Why is the rum always gone

Friend's straight roommate: "And btw YES I do wash my butthole and that's the last we'll speak about it." Me: "Now I'm just thinking about his butthole."

*googles "magic underpants"* "Do you mean Temple Garments"

Snakes are sad about this restriction

#Overwatch is pretty much "how can I be super toxic without being chat banned" and then they get banned and just start another free character with a bogus email address .

FUCK*

How about you lay here, and watch me play FFVI while I eat your ass.

I periodically check in on #SecondWind for #BreathoftheWild and last I had checked they encountered a memory issue preventing more items/quests/etc from being added. I think maybe they fixed that? Seeing some updates from last month so crossing my fingers! Been waiting a decade for the finished mod!

Do they sell big, hairy adult booty fuck toys or just the small, hairless toddler-size?