Eliza Skinner - comedian
@elizaskinner.bsky.social
đ¤ 4818
đĽ 116
đ 887
Comedian, writer, producer, ceramicist, slave to the rhythm (and my dog.) BooBerryJones.etsy.com
Private message to freaks like me: The holiday bath bombs are 50% off at Lush now but you gotta go into the actual store.
about 6 hours ago
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Finished a 7 season rewatch of Nurse Jackie today, starting The Pitt now. This is gonna be ok, right? Itâs not like a TV speedball?
about 6 hours ago
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If youâve found yourself viewing men, or white people, or straight people as the default - the âcheese pizzaâ if you will, and every other kind of person else is just some kind of variety of toppings on it, I beg you to take a class or something this year. Go on a journey. Get smarter. Itâll be fun!
about 6 hours ago
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When I see a shitty person I know becoming really successful online I like to lay back and enjoy the âtick tick tick tickâ before that first big drop.
about 7 hours ago
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I got a new haircut the day the US invaded Venezuela and no one mentioned it on the news :(
about 7 hours ago
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I have become the unnecessary unofficial street team for Heated Rivalry. Iâm less proud of the dozen or so people I have recommended it to who came back obsessed - the real point of pride is the one who RANTED to me about what TRASH it is & how she couldnât BELIEVE she watched every single episode.đ
about 7 hours ago
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Walking the dog on a rainy New Years Eve in Los Angeles, seeing everyoneâs giant TVs through their windows, replaying Heated Rivalry.
3 days ago
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Every time I hear reports about Hudson Williams and Connor Storrie being out and about in Los Angeles I worry, because remember how they had to remove the Jack Sparrow walk-around character from Disney World because he kept being groped by horny moms? Stay safe fellas.
3 days ago
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2026 top trendâ Out: Bittersweet Symphonies In: Honey Mustard Rags
4 days ago
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Donât forget to check inside your shoes before you put them on, because what if there is a great big crunchy spider in there?
4 days ago
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My dog coughed and audibly farted at the same time and in my house we call that The Christmas Miracle.
8 days ago
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Get Hudson Williams in a Steve Perry biopic STAT and let me write it.
14 days ago
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The greatest bag ever fumbled was Restoration Hardware discontinuing their foot duvets. How did yâall fuck that up??
14 days ago
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Some really impressive work being done the field of ânot all menâ in quote replies everywhere.
16 days ago
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I am confident that we could solve the male loneliness epidemic if men just started talking to people in their communities instead of into podcast microphones.
17 days ago
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Please watch Aparna Nancherlaâs special, Hopeful Potato out NOW on Dropout! Aparna is the best, and the special was directed by the devastatingly gorgeous and very smart guy, me!
add a skeleton here at some point
19 days ago
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LAST CHANCE FOR XMAS SALE - today and tomorrow everything is 20% off, but you gotta order by tomorrow to get it in time for Christmas.
BooBerryJones.etsy.com
20 days ago
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Sometimes I have to remind myself that everything I say in casual conversation does not have to establish my entire character, because I am not a character in a movie - and thank god bc movies are dead so Iâd be screwed.
21 days ago
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Check in on your friends who know what they are doing. They donât know what they are doing. Knowing what youâre doing is a trauma response. There is no âknowingâ or âwhatâ, only âdoing.â Can this đ be a book proposal? Money por Eliza, sâil vous plait.
23 days ago
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Hitting pause on my life until the US release of Pillion in February 2026.
about 1 month ago
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Itâs time for some REAL cultural advancements - letâs start pronouncing P.M. and A.M âpeemâ and âahmâ. YOU CANT SPEND YOUR LIFE FEARING CHANGE, YOU COWARDS!!
about 1 month ago
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reposted by
Eliza Skinner - comedian
Nick Wester, PI
about 1 month ago
I already bought the cool hand-crafted (Not) Poison mug featured in the preview, but there was one with a different handle and lots more cool stuff! It's artisanal, get a mug your future great grandkids will think you're a witch for having!
add a skeleton here at some point
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My mugs & jars Etsy shop update is live - and 25% off! Wall monsters & dishes coming Monday and the sale will continueâŚ.
BooBerryJones.etsy.com
about 1 month ago
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Seeing that BOTH versions of the Johnny Lee Miller / Benedict Cumberbatch Frankenstein are streaming on the National Theater App made me exclaim âooh!â in a way only a confirmed hermit can. Very mumbly and hoarse, through a thick beard and mustache - but excited!
about 1 month ago
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I have become a creepy pottery reply guy. Every time I see a post of a cool bowl I gotta comment something like âgorgeousâ, âbeautifulâ, or âhello bowl, do you need a sugar daddy to spoil you, $7000 a week, no nudesâ
about 1 month ago
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Send in the perimenopausal neurodivergent women. You think we havenât been called names before? You think we donât talk back to powerful idiots? Even if it will cost us a job/career/citizenship?? Oh boy - FILL THE PLANE WITH US.
add a skeleton here at some point
about 2 months ago
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Itâs 7pm in November so itâs midnight. See you in the spring, early evening!
about 2 months ago
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LA DOGS - the rain is gonna be heavy today. Thunder starting in a few hours. Time to put on your headphones and get into your audiobooks. Youâll need peanut butter on deck. Dog be with you.
about 2 months ago
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Me pitching to O Henry: Ok, so the dog - heâs a very good dog, you know? Real good boy. But hereâs the thing - he hates the rain. Canât stand it. Refuses to go outside to potty. Instead heâs gonna wait it out. So heâs waiting all morning - because again, heâs a good boy. Thatâs important to him 1/2
about 2 months ago
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Fuck the âbirdâ theory. Thatâs amateur hour! Iâm going with the âwhen you tell me you traveled to another reality and back I will believe youâ theory.
about 2 months ago
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Upon this most recent rewatch, the most relatable parts of The Leftovers are the the absolutely batshit, intense, â¨meaningful⨠dream sequences. Hands up, who is having Leftovers-style dreams these days?
about 2 months ago
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There should be a scientific study of the women who get close to Elon Musk and want to fuck him more than they want to stab him in the neck. Either way you can definitely grab some cash on your way out the door, girl - may as well swing for the fences.
about 2 months ago
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Also, here is a photo of a good grilled cheese I made with kimchi and a monster vase I made with stoneware clay.
about 2 months ago
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Hahaha our Governor is a ski club bully taking a break from hazing frosh.
about 2 months ago
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Feeling a lil depressy, decided to start a rewatch of the Leftovers. Keep your eye on this space for downdates!
2 months ago
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Perimenopause should be a universally accepted legal defense. âThis woman kicked over her neighborâs garbage can because it was left in the street for a week.â âHow do you plead?â âNot Guilty Due To Perimenopause.â âCase dismissed!â
2 months ago
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Just had to go to a party next door to ask them to please move their party inside (it was drunk screaming outside my bedroom window.) The response from the tenants was very respectful, but the response from the GenZ girl guests made me want to drop everything and devote my life to becoming a witch.
2 months ago
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I donât get it, why donât they put turn signals on Teslas or Porsches? If I was gonna pay that much for a car, I would definitely want it equipped with turn signals.
2 months ago
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Hey, did you know that if you donate to
@laist.com
when you pick your âthank youâ gift you can choose from options like providing meals to families in need or shelter animals? Check out just a few of these options. Fund public local media!
2 months ago
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Every time I forget to limit my replies I get nothing but asshole replies.
2 months ago
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What happened to just shrugging your shoulders at people who seem weird to you? If we all just rolled our eyes and kept it moving - and let people live their freaky little lives in peace - we could all be happy! Make America âOk, whateverâ Again.
3 months ago
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If you are tempted to get mad at me for my last post, you should know that my cat just kissed me on the lips so I think weâre married now. Is it really worth arguing with me?
3 months ago
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One of the weirdest ideas going around is that immigrants are here getting free healthcare. But⌠we donât have that here. If that was idea they would truck on through and get to Canada or Mexico. We are the LEAST attractive system available. Itâs like saying they are stealing our magic wands.
3 months ago
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âLetâs hang out soon - grab coffee or something. I actually mean it, lol!â WHAT?!? I NEVER DONT MEAN IT. EVERY TIME, I ALWAYS MEAN IT. OTHERWISE I WILL SAY âit was nice to see/hear from you!â Or âWell⌠where did you park?â Or âcool shoes! Bye bye! Tell your cat hi from me!â
3 months ago
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Little old ladies at the protests are breaking me. I love them so much. These are the same women who have been protesting for just causes for decades and theyâre still going.
3 months ago
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#NoKings
! Only small princes taking a morning whiz on a hilltop! See you on the streets!
3 months ago
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JD Vance seems to be making more public appearances recently. I have to assume it is to remind the public that he has the energy of a dude who corners you at a party to ask (with thick, gummy, catshit breath) why you donât like him - tearfully begs you to kiss him - then calls you a bitch.
3 months ago
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This should be the absolute BEST time of year (2 more weeks of Spooky Season, then Vince Guaraldi Season begins). But this violent, racist, classist, misogynist administration has been DESTROYING it with - what I am calling - their War On Spooky Season.
3 months ago
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Not Pennyâs Boat
3 months ago
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Man, I am so here for all the DWTS love for Andy Richter. Itâs no coincidence that when I got my own show (Earth To Ned) Andy was literally the first guest we had. Heâs just a good, kind (and very funny) dude.
3 months ago
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