I fear I'm at the age where one night of drinking has two day consequences 😩

Saw a guy ralph outside the passenger side window of a car the other night, and honestly it be like that sometimes.

Don't care if it's cringe, if you grab my biceps, I WILL flex 🙃

“i was thinking before we came, ‘wow i hope adam doesn’t make me take one of those pictures’” - @thomcb88.bsky.social

You ever think about insects and how some feed exclusively on specific plants? Like switch it up girl, have some variety.

The first person to sell boba:

Anything get lost in the Bermuda Triangle lately??

Thai people really went OFF with mango sticky rice 🤤🤤

Kumori this Kumori that how about instead you K** o* m* ****

And if i went to France then so what,?????🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷

Had dinner a few hours ago and now I'm hungry again. Wots this about then??

My favorite part of CRANK is when Slayyyter goes full Matthew McConaughey mode ("Alrightalrightalright")

Why was Oshawott, a water-type otter Pokemon, not named "Wotter"??

*Blasting KGB by Adéla on Joseph McCarthy's grave*

Met another gay named Adam (that's 4 so far) and I'm starting to think it isn't a coincidence.

I would never label myself a hater. But a Carissa Holly really is my nemesis. Never loathed a shrub so much.

Don't give up on your faith! Love comes to those who believe it!

Now why am I getting sucked off by mosquitoes midday. They're supposed to be crepuscular 😡

Whoever first had the idea to put flaky sea salt on a chocolate chip cookie needs to get their ass ate

Okay but why do we even need to have capsaicin receptors down there??

They should put a lil mirror next to the camera where you take your driver's license pic.

Have they ever tried making being at the DMV an enjoyable experience??

"Balls to the wall" is so interesting bc who was the first to do that and why?

Love seeing my profile pic in skircles bc it's usually hot guy hot guy cartoon hot guy hot guy... then coquettish little orange.

Torn between A) wanting bigger traps and B) being able to carry a tote bag on my shoulder.

Went on a sunset walk to get gelato after dinner and the serotonin surge was STRONG 😌 😌 10/10 absolutely recommend.

One (1) kiss to anyone who can get me to a pool and a margarita STAT❕️

The change in spelling of "ur" to "your" was the reptile leaving my body actually.

Irl bloomf shocked to know I also wear boxers

Y'all ever be drinking and enter reptile mode?

Shadow of a Man. Shape of a Woman.

Me when bloomfs post selfies: Aww what a cutie, love him 😊

Eating so many pastries this morning idgaf

Roxie and Velma to each other at the end of Chicago

The things I would do for a hot freshly made flour tortilla rn 🤤🤤

Bloomfs how did you choose which record player you have? I'm looking into getting one but I don't know nothing about anything 🙈

Need to memorize the Eastside Girls bridge STAT 📝

Ah yes, Thomas. Jeffer's son.

GMHFHAGD (good morning happy Friday have a great day) ☀️

Happy AAPI Heritage Month! Now give me $10.

If y'all aren't already aware, the Nine Inch Noize album is fantastic 🙌

@ guys that sing loudly in the gym: why do that?

Morgoth was really in his Swedish Girl Era when naming his fortresses. Angbänd and Utümno sound like items you can buy at IKEA.

Why "queued" pronounced "kewd" and not "kwayoowayd"?

I'll have a bowl of cool beans with awesome sauce on the side please.

Do you guys ever think about drought and the potential (and likely) oncoming collapse of freshwater resources?

Ducks hyping each other up

Can't wait for it to get hotter than a hoochie coochie 🤠 (minus the mosquitoes and heat exhaustion)

Uhaul Hamasaki.

Anyway, I miss train-obsessed mustached ex-bloomf. Hope he's doing well.