"Chola or Orient-made" really is a crazy lyric

Gym crush came into the locker room humming a lil tune, and I just love seeing my guys happy!

Secured my first Tevas. Can't wait to have my little piggies out 😁

Not to size queen bait but why are most sunscreen bottles so small?

Why do I need to pay a mechanic for a tire rotation when my tires rotate on their own for free????

Cropped and hemmed this shirt and honestly I'm into it! Work!

Met a gay from Williamsburg and idk he was nice!

Yeah but have you ever stopped to listen to the sweet sounds of your dog crunching on an apple?

At a friend's place to watch Drag Race and these gays just started making FUNNEL CAKES 🤤🤤

The transition from Chromatica II to 911 still gives me chills every time!

I think I'm going to debut my Teva era this summer ☺️

If you're in public and standing in the way, you get 1 polite "ope 'scuuussseee me 🙂" after that you get "*ahem* EXCUSE ME 🤨"

This is one of the best songs released so far this year and they deserve more hype!

Ibuprofen for breakfast LETS FUCKEN GOOOOO 💥‼️🎭

I need Michelle Visage to give a TED talk on exactly what she is looking for in a family resemblance for the makeover challenge.

Well fellas, it's the time of year to start cropping all of my shirts

I just want to put my long johns away but it's still so cold outside!!!! 🥶

First person to bring me a corned beef sandwich today is getting a kiss immediately.

I love going on vacation and coming home with a powerful life lesson like a surviving White Lotus character.

Always funny walking by someone who gives you the dirtiest look.

Never not thinking about my Next Hit Skeet™️

...should I move to Seattle??

Need you all to know that the REAL me is a Southern girl with her Levi's on and an open heart.

Literally who is up and why

I do my best comedy bits with my Uber/Lyft driver tbh

Trying the -going to the bar solo- thing and honestly I feel uncomfortable about it. Chat chime in.

Why is it so cold in Seattle rn. This is the coldest I've ever felt.

Man I love rivers, creeks, streams, and babbling brooks 😍

Need to start saying "right on" more

Whoever invented waterfalls needs to get their ass ate.

At gay guy music video night and a gay unironically requested Suit and Tie by Justin Timberlake. Should he be tarred and feathered?

This morning I learned the first verse of Ray of Light is a sample! Knowledge really is power.

Omw to see how many of my students show up to class the Friday before Spring Break.

Is Portland (Oregon) fun?

I just know a saucy double patty burger with melted cheese in a potato roll bun would heal me rn

I just know a doughnut would heal me rn

Improve your quality of life and that of everyone around you by acquiring these 3 things!⭐️Decorum ⭐️Couth ⭐️A Damn Clue

I had such a great weekend so here's a toasty one ferda boys 🫡🤙

Eating a chocolate chip cookie with espresso powder in it for breakfast is basically the same thing as having just a black coffee right?

Breaking out the Spring decorations today THANK GOD 🪻🐣🌷🐇

Nevermind I just finished my slice of apple crumb pie and am ready for bed now.

Will people think I'm weird if I go to Little Gay Pub solo rn?

Girl, if you're not [reracking your weights], you're only getting [the electric chair]⚡️

Daffodil leaves are up and jelly beans are in the grocery stores! Spring is almost here!🪻

I have a tendency to avoid conflicts at all cost, but I think my quarter year resolution is to be more confrontational with people who are overtly rude or disrespectful to me, my husband, and/or my friends.

Amazing how much popcorn can fit in those lil bags

Today was v v rough but I made it to the gym anyway 🤸‍♂️✨️

What's a guy gotta do to hear back from potential employers?????????

#1 is Lady Gaga - Venus (feat. The Muppets) And then this one for variety. A silly one but still entertaining!

When the hot gay weatherman posts on his Close Friends and it's not a spicy pic but rather just a fun picture of his girlfriends <<<<<<<<<<<