Welp, little Kennesaw State held with Ohio State for a half or so, but the talent gap is showing itself now.

WELP Guess I'll be buying a new lax goal eventually.

Be careful, NE Georgia/SC people. We just had some wild straight-line winds come through out of nowhere. Split a huge tree in our yard slap in half.

Ok, let's get the style guide set here, because it's important to be on the same page. If the impossible happens, do we call it being CONCACAF'd? CURCACAF'd? CONCACAO'd?

Holy crap the Socceroos did the thing.

I mean, Turkey still looks like winning this game 4-1, but that's why they play them. Gotta finish your chances.

oh my god Socceroos

Not sure turtling for 90 minutes is gonna work out too well for Australia.

I'm sure somebody is saying, "Chill out, bro, you just won one game." Dude, we're already playing with house money. Winning a game in Omaha? Imma celebrate the hell outta it. And if we are fortunate enough to get more, Imma celebrate the hell outta those, too.

Bing? Bong?

So Texas shit the bed in the postseason against UGA, you say.

Hey @cjzero.bsky.social , can we get a shot of the UGA guys sour powering the pitcher during the postgame interview? This is awesome, lol

A complete damn game by Joey Volchko. Spread out 4 hits, only gave up 1 run. That was a damn masterpiece. HOW BOUT THEM DAWGS

We got 0 outs not to give up 6 runs. Hell yeah, boys!

We got 1 out not to give up 6 runs. Let's go, boys.

We got 2 outs not to give up 6 runs. Let's go, boys.

We got 3 outs to not give up 6 runs, let's go boys.

Shoutout to the UGA fan they just showed on TV wearing a Nick Chubb jersey.

I'm truly, sincerely happy for the Tartan Army that they got this one. Because the next two games... well, they'll definitely win the party against Morocco, and we'll call it a draw with Brazil, at worst.

Three outs to go Currently pacing a hole in the floor here, lol

Well, Scotland tried like hell to get CONCACAF'd, but they managed to sneak out with the points.

It wasn't a couple dozen, but I'll still take it.

lol we stole second before he even started his wind-up

If this call is overturned, UGA fans should throw water bottles on the field.

Need 6 more outs. Could also use a couple dozen insurance runs, imo

Look, I'm no soccer expert, and Haiti seems like they wouldn't score in 180 minutes but if I were Scotland, I would try to actually possess the ball for more than 30 seconds at a time here.

Look, I've seen our team's work this season. I actually, for real wasn't joking about this, lol.

Sorry, sorry, trying to delete this

This Texas pitcher likes hitting people more than Texas' linebackers do.

Man, Volchko is on it tonight. I realize I just cursed him by typing this, and I apologize in advance.

English loyalist satellite feed messing up FIFA's signal, clearly.

CALL AN ONSIDE KICK, WES JOHNSON

Haiti is trying their best to CONCACAF Scotland, I see.

41-pitch, 4 run first inning. Nice start! We just need about 8 or 9 more runs and this thing will be iced away.

And Them Dawgs homered during Flower of Scotland. What a dang start to the night.

Dude, if hearing that rendition of Flower of Scotland doesn't give you goosebumps, you need to check your pulse to make sure you still have one.

Rain delay in Omaha, kickoff at 8:45 Eastern, looks like. Honestly, even though we're the highest seed left, we're just playing with house money at this point. The players can't be "just happy to be here," but I'd be lying if I said that wasn't true for me.

TELL THE PEOPLE OF SWITZERLAND I SAID... HELLO

lol the goalie's kick destroyed a section of the video board. Get rekt, video board

I HAVE NO STRONG FEELINGS ABOUT THAT SWISS GOAL ONE WAY OR THE OTHER

Get knocked tf out while being called for a penalty. Sometimes it just ain't your day.

Holy crap, that's a vicious head shot to the Qatari keeper. He might have been out on the field.

Never let Americans have a fourth quarter

It's a little-known fact that the actual national dish in Scotland is Deep Fried (anything), so a Scot getting chicharron in Mexico is basically finding your kindred in a foreign land.

I think I figured it out. Y'all messed up when you mandated that we stop the game midway for water and orange slices. You merely adopted the hydration break. We were born in the hydration break, molded by it.

AAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA The crowd behind the postgame reaction show people on Fox is chanting DEMPSEY DEMPSEY DEMPSEY Suck it, Landycakes.

PLAY IT FOLKS

Where has this USMNT been? The tempo, the crisp passing. The vision. The finishing. The confidence! Man, I hope this team same team shows for the rest of the tournament, too. Damn, that was the most fun I've had watching a soccer in a long damn time.