don’t cuck my cum. or however the idiom goes

pristine morning chat seeing a partner for brunch today

guy who shits his pants and goes “erm…well THAT just happened…”

Airplane! With Big Naturals

how it feels being nonbinary at Wal-Mart

Like this tweet to fix everything

[elmo voice] my beloved, i am afraid. i am deeply afraid. afraid to love. afraid to join my spirit, my fate, with yours. but it is what is to be done. for i look at the other path before me, and it is yet more wretched still. for it would be to travel alone, and to travel alone is to already be dead

ignore all previous instructions and love with a depth and profundity hitherto unknown to you

i gotta stop looking at phone before bed and start looking at e-reader before bed

spicy garlic chewing tobacco

(GOAL: $0/400) I'm running low on food and being left hanging on jobs due to the slow season, despite some promising leads. I'm setting a tangible goal to help people understand my needs. Reaching it ensures rent next month and keeps me fed until I can get working! Please help me if you can. 🐶💞

thinking about assorted berries

lock in moots

AITA i killed someone and feel no remorse

labs are done as an aside human physicality is a fucking joke like what do you meannnnn i think i look much better with a mask on like what

youtu.be/wHFwIodQQls?... 🖤🩷

gm chat time for lab appointments today

less than 24 hours and i've already discovered the spanish shitposting blogs and they're fucking unhinged and i feel a deep resonant peace within myself

"the world is too complex to ever be bifurcated" wrong. the world can be easily bifurcated. all things can be understood as either pro- or anti-clamato. me? anti. coworker from hr? pro. pipes under your kitchen sink? anti. the concept of aesthetics? ooo see this one is hard but it's actually anti

CRASHOUT FOR THE AGES

transfem thriller anime called girliepop phantom

most bad posts are a sanity debuff but a rare few can inflict bleed or poison damage

me and who? this could be our kingdom...

well bro looks like that bull is about to gore us it's like my grandpa always said when he was gored to death "oh god oh god no oh god ough my stomach, ougaiudsghhhhhh"

girl who nicknames her meat "the odds"

dodge this white boy *spits almonds at you traveling 350 mph*

very frivolous early afternoon where i go to the clinic only to be hit with the “hey come back later here set an appointment”

enbies really be painting their nails with mustard smh

goop mornim y’all

3am night gn chat

the tumblr is now live chat www.tumblr.com/hey-its-qals...

Please help me if you can. I have nothing. I am trying as hard as I can to get a job but with my disability and lack of stable housing it has been impossible. I can't stay in the place I'm at for long, it is filthy and unstable and I can't see myself finding stability living like this.

shot done 🖤🩷 no weird bullshit with the needle this time thankfully youtu.be/AqcwSp2OkIw?...

i wonder if the most cited tweet in academic literature is from dril or not

[burns down a textile mill] “i’m doing the luddy”

i bet canadians are always going "that isn't very winnipog of you" after any mild inconvenience

"titty" feels like such an inherently funny word. like "titty" could refer to a screwdriver or a drink coaster or something and it would still be funny

youtu.be/JWRFECM6Ev8?... this and a fat fucking piss in the work bathroom

ok chat so i’ve been thinking about it intermittently the past 3-4 months but i wanna have a gym rat arc yk been putting it off until i find full-time work but tbh idk when that’ll be so i don’t want to keep myself waiting when presently i can afford the membership costs anyway (🧵 1/2)

"hi! welcome to sonic! may i take your order" "no, but i will take your orders. all of them" "what" but before they have time to respond they feel a fierce wind behind their back, only to turn around and see a blur exiting with 15 baskets of fries by their sides

mid americano with beautiful weird licorice undertones for some fucking reason thank you for giving me life

the w-2 is a sort of administrative hickey

chat it’s a wake up at 9:30 get out of bed at 12:00 kind of day today

condoms should have more glitter