All time MVP at the bank

Having a ticker for “Miles to the Moon” fucking rocks, I love going to the moon

I could both launch and fly that rocket. No problem.

Haven’t seen this one in a while. Truly evergreen

I hear that brother

Every day this week I changed my alarm from 5:45 to 5:10 and when asked if I want to change to schedule I scream NO and hit that button. Because I am an optimist

March Break-up: A Bend in the North River Maurice Cullen n.d.

Lmao

Rare good news!

Bernie Madoff would blush at these numbers

My pal @maggierahr.bsky.social has a missing cat in the north street neighbourhood of #halifax, please keep your eyes peeled and share #hfx

Overheard coworkers having same conversation about me. Inappropriate

It’s Friday and I am having a few large beers

Long since past the point where google is pretty much useless

Look at her face. What a nice thing. That rules

It’s Friday

The other night I decided we were gonna call our local conspiracy peddling mushroom dealer Temu Mulder

Yowza!

Also me trying to have a soda water at the bar

You’d have to be quite the simpleton to think this is good

Costco has the most helpful employees in the biz and every register is open compared to local grocery stores where they have 2 registers open, one kid overseeing eight self checkouts and security guards to make sure you don’t steal anything (i still do)

I also get these because I’m in a coma

Get Jorty

Dudes rock

You really always have to keep your head on a swivel

I want a beer that you drink out of a hand grenade

Hell yeah

Sometimes you see a picture and you just know you’re gonna be seeing that shit at least once a month for like ten, fifteen years

Without fail when people who scoff at CBC tell me what they listen to or read for news it’s genuinely laughable. It’s always YouTube drivel or talk radio where white guys call in to shout nonsense

I’ll just say this, anybody I can get my hands on who takes pictures of me with these, without telling me and posts them is gonna get a shit kicking

Siri, thank you

Embarrassing that New Brunswick did this before Nova Scotia. That being said, I stopped using X, The Everything App for routine communications a long time ago. I even stopped using it for banking

Night court theme fucking slaps

SKOL

The official app of sports

I’m having a few small beers

So annoying when your porno machine accidentally does anti-semitism

Yeah why ask the guy who’s job it is to know about and sell tires and instead ask a shitty computer program that’s wrong at least half the time

These people are absolutely cooked

Measles super spreader event incoming

Betting this kind of thing without having the prerequisite inside info is dumber than betting on professional wrestling. Just real ol timey mark shit, spending your life savings to win an Xbox at the fair type shit

There used to be a set of John swartzwelder novels available for purchase and I can’t find it anywhere now and I’m so pissed I didn’t buy it when I could. Huge regret.

A touching tribute to Mike F

I fucking loved this show when I was a kid. Truly excellent stuff

The most hospitalized man in history

Weird name for a cat

I’m well past the point where if someone says they use this I assume they’re a moron and usually tell them as much

I remember this happening and trying to get my normal friends to look at it and they absolutely would not. Their loss