If you want to know how Monday went just know that I activated not one but two of my emergency measures for stress: I had takeout AND a glass of wine.

Anyway, as we celebrate the 21st of September, please also celebrate the birthday of my mother and godmother, two Notorious Virgo women. 😮‍💨🤣

I was going to try NOT to look like an American in Paris, but honestly that might be the best pickpocket deterrent. They know we’re ITCHING to unleash pent-up aggression.

Other People’s Children Reveal the Passing of Time to Me, a Childless Woman: a memoir. Like why is the baby I held six months ago going to high school now?!?

I’m on the couch trying to talk myself into washing my hair. Being an adult never gets easier.

Last Wednesday a student asked me to be the advisor for his rap club. He warned me that it might not actually get approved b/c they need at least 15 students…flash forward to today. The club currently has had over thirty students join the group chat. 🤔🤪😅

I don’t know where your life is, but I’m currently listening to a Dan Brown book in 2025…and enjoying it! I’m recapturing a specific moment in time.

And the arms of the ocean…delivered me.

Never let me go. Never let me go.

I feel like the unasked question floating around was, “Who can burn out first?” and I’m going for gold 🤭

This school year is already full of drama and we’re just five days in!

I try so hard to articulate through writing how much goes into teaching, how much my mood or my morals or my ideas can shape my students for good or for bad, but it’s so hard to put into words.

Today I raised my voice to rant at my G12 students about their lateness and the phrase “Lax Discipline” leapt from my mouth like my mother was speaking through me. My transition into her is rolling over me like a wave.

I said “Put that in your pot and cook it” with all seriousness and feeling and I think I should get my AARP membership now.

First day nails.

First day of school officially tomorrow but no classes. Still😆 I’m too excited to calm down and sleep.

If you’re a light foundation girly, I can’t recommend Ilia’s Super Serum Skin Tint enough! You can put it on with your hands and your skin will glow all day long.

I bought myself a big fancy tote as a gift to myself to start the new school year.

Watched Infinity War and Endgame on the plane back to Shanghai & can confirm: Thanos was ice cold. A level of “I don’t give a fuck” that has yet to be recreated.

Baking humbles me every time. If whatever I tried to make comes out edible that’s a blessing.

I just put my first (and last!) pound cake into the oven. My God! Baking is rough.

There’s a reason I don’t watch most mainstream shows because The Hunting Wives had me ready to write a dissertation about the decline of morality 🙄

Talk to your neighbour! Start train spotting! Consider tennis! Get a dog and go to puppy classes! What of lawn bowls? What of music lessons! Learn to ceilidh dance! Take French! MY GOD LADS IT DOESNT HAVE TO BE FASCISM.

Just finished Nosferatu and not anticipating sleeping tonight

you know shade comes from reading...

Making lesson plans and feeling sad that Lorraine Hansberry only lived to age 34. But whew, she got a lot of work done. Amen.

I’m 28 episodes into a fantasy cdrama and this is pain like I have never known. No one does high drama like the Chinese!

I think…in order to meet the kind of men I’m interested in…I have to… go outside. *wails*

In case you wondered: the dating apps continue to feel like being in the depths of hell.

Florence sings “delivered me” & that’s as close as I get to church.

Coldplay gave us free and excellent entertainment yesterday.

Important lesson from Columbo: the minute you go back & try to correct things that didn’t need to be corrected, you’re cooked! Leave it alone.

I know that I’m not living my life right until I can be like this cat at 2:53 on a Thursday afternoon.

I can’t believe how stupid everything is. Like just when I worry things can’t get stupider, life finds a way.

How do we get men to reincorporate the lightweight trench into men’s daily wear á la Columbo?

I am so nosy and I do not care. If you are speaking aloud in a public place please know that my antenna is tuned all the way in. MATERIAL COMES FROM ALL PLACES.

While getting a manicure today I overheard a story so interesting I accidentally turned and said, “Really?!” Left with all the details, pictures, and a debrief.

As Maria Bamford says, “There’s no rule that says we can’t lead him into a bramble.”

Absolutely ready for a Frenchman to ruin my life. It's time.

I am not worried about Paris Syndrome. Instead, I am worried that I will want to drop everything and move to Paris.

Just finished Jess Walter’s So Far Gone. Feels good that I can still count on him to use fiction to express so many inexplicable feelings that so many of us are experiencing right now.

The way my barely-there-but-still-there southern lilt came back the moment I stepped off the plane in CLT needs to be studied.

Someone tell me to have the wine. I need an outside force to assert pressure.

The relief in knowing I can always watch a few episodes of Columbo.

Being on the dating apps in America comes with the sad realization that if someone mentions NOT being vaccinated then nothing else on the profile matters to me.

Spending money and then being shocked when I see it being withdrawn from my account: on repeat.

Explains so many decisions I’ve made & why I covet my freedom.

I got super teary thinking about the people my grandmother & mother could’ve been if they’d waited to have children or even decided not to have them at all.

Just saw a picture of my mother aged 22, one & a half years before she would have me and… that’s a baby 🥲 I wish she’d given herself more time.